The star ship Idiot

[J-Kama-Ka-C]

*The captain grumbles at the lose of the present like material and is forced to temporarily suspend the second in commands teleporter priviages, the captain then further grumbles since its unlikely to stop the problem

*Wo2 rushes off to some part unknow to explore all the dark corners of the ship with a flashlight. Unfortuatly every time he gets close to one it gets bright.*

ARGH no corners are there they always hide

[Gryffin]

*Gryffin plants a flag on top of the bunker, and has a picture taken of him doing it. He then sticks the picture up in the Officer's Mess, with the legend, 'Gryffin scales Mt. Ginge!' written underneath it.*

[Evil_Ginge]

*the security guns incinerate the flag and the picture, then ginge teleports Gryffin into a maze, with drones to get away from

[Gryffin]

*Gryffin wonders why they had security guns in the Officer's Mess, and he ports himself back there. He then gets a toasted cheese sandwitch.*

*sniff sniff*........i smell CHEESEEEEE.....EAAAHAHA *Wo2 jumps on gryfinn and takes the cheese of the bread and runs down the hall way laughimg insanely.*

EEEHEHEHE MINE MINE MINE.............

[Gryffin]

*Gryffin flies down the corridor after wo2, hanging on by the cheese in his mouth, because it is that exact texture of cheese that will never break after it is melted. Gryffin begins to eat his way along the cheese, getting slowly closer to the Cheese Thief.*

[QazokRouge5]

Teleports onto the ship and shoots the cheese, making Gryffin fall flat on his face

[Gryffin]

*Gryffin throws a multi-spanner at Qazok.*

"What did you do that for? I would have got him and everything."

[Evil_Ginge]

*Ginge finds out a way to control all the ships functions through a chip in his brain, so makes this chip then vapourises the bunker

"right now lets see what i can do"

[ToeJam]

toe jam materializes in a secluded part of the ship.. he looks around and see's that he is all alone.. he then comences to paint graffiti on the ship walls.

as he runs thru the halls with his spray paint he notices a small hole in the ship that is leaking atmosphere he starts to kick at it.. thinking i bet i can make it bigger

[QazokRouge5]

Qazok decides to freak everybdy out and so he makes all the lights on the ship like strobe lights.

[Shadow275]

*Shadow changesthe Strobe freauenzy so it goes back to normal

"teh stupid Qazok"

[Evil_Ginge]

*because ginge is feeling evil, as usual, he seals up the gap with a force feild, leaving toejam to kick at it indefinatly

[ToeJam]

toe jam notices that a force field has been placed over the hole.
he then departs to find the room of the evil_ginge .
as he walks into the evil_ginge room he commences to paint it in light fruity pastel colors making sure that evrey inch of wall floor cieling furniture and anything that moves are covered.including the evil_ginge doggy.

with 1 last look he smiles at his handy work and departs

[J-Kama-Ka-C]

*J-Kama-Ka-C returns to the bridge, wondering what happened to the bunker and more comically what happened to Ginge, he points and laughs

*Wo2 tears down the hall noticing a hole and teeth marks on his cheese*

Hey what gives. *Wo2 eats it*

[ToeJam]

toe jam hiding behind the bridge toilet watches as
j-kama-ka-c laughes at evil_ginge..

toe jam waits till j-kama bends forward from laughing and throws an empty paint can at him. toe jam then closes the door to the toilet and waits..

[Gryffin]

*Gryffin comes onto the bridge and notices Ginge. He opens the toilet door to find ToeJam hiding there.*

"Oh. You must be the new cleaning staff."

*Gryffin hands a toothbursh and a bar of soap to ToeJam.*

"Make sure you clean under the rim. We have to use that if we go into battle and things begin to look bad."

[J-Kama-Ka-C]

*Feeling a sharp clunk on the back of the head he turns around and picks up the empty can, while rubbing the sore spot looks around, finding nothing is now left holding the 'evidence'

[ToeJam]

*toe jam accepts the toothbrush and soap from gryffin,without saying a word*

as soon as gryffn departs toe jam removes a dozen pairs of very dirty socks from a pack on his side..he then comences to clean his socks with the toothbrush and soap.. he uses the overhead hot water pipes to hang and dry them..

toejam peaks out of the toilet but sees J-Kama-Ka-C still looking around with the empty paint can.. toejam quickly closes the door and continues to clean his socks

[Evil_Ginge]

*Ginge smiles as he electronically locks the door, and puts up force feilds all around the toilet toejam is in

[ToeJam]

toe jam hears as the door is electronicaly locked from the outside..seeing no way out at the moment he finishes cleaning his socks,
he then reaches into the same pouch and takes out a months worth of dirty underwear he then commences to use the toothbrush and soap to clean them..all the time he is chewing on a3 week old gum he found behind the toilet seat.

*wo2 runs to the captains room and raids his fridge and runs off yelling*

MINE MINE MINE

[ToeJam]

Toe Jam finishes his cleaning, he packs everything away very neatly.
he then notices that not only is the door elcertonicaly closed but there is a forcefield. he looks around and all of a sudden he smacks his head,, why didnt he think of it before the flow tube escape..
ToeJam slips on a very tight tube sock over his head and body the sokc is old and smeared with grease.. ToeJam sticks his head in the toilet and jumps in while flushing it at the same time.

he begins to turn then swooosshhh he is taken into the pipes as he goes along he systematically pokes holes in the pipes each hole is directly ove he beds of all the crew members aboard..

finally he reaches the sewer bin.. he climbs out via an opening and commences to walk the hall way while shaking himself dry..

[Gryffin]

*Gryffin decides in one of those Evil decisions ordained by the Plot God that he should vent the sewer bin. He therefore opens the chamber Toejam is in to open space.*

[Evil_Ginge]

*Ginge sends up a prayer to the plot god and turns to hsi consol, brining the weapons system,s online and ready for some target practice as soon as teojam comes into view of the outer guns

[ToeJam]

ooc?? haha i was already in the passage ways shaking off the dirt..

[ToeJam]

Originally posted by Evil_Ginge
*Ginge sends up a prayer to the plot god and turns to hsi consol, brining the weapons system,s online and ready for some target practice as soon as teojam comes into view of the outer guns

ooc/ im a nOOb ill take my abuse now..

ic

Toe Jam finds himslef sucked out of the bin and sent into space. now in full free fall he starts to spin ,,
he then finds himself being shot at as if he were target parctice.. owww,, uhhhh hey not there it hurts..

spin spin spin he is out of control:eek: :eek:

[J-Kama-Ka-C]

*The Captains searches his pockets for a moment and eventually retrieves a tractor token, slipping it into the console grabs the joystick and tries to locate ToeJam

*The crane game tractor system drops from the upper hull and jerks about, the claw repeatedly missing the target... several tokens later ToeJam is eventually deposited back in the cargobay

"Looks I could use the target practice too... *grin*"

[Evil_Ginge]

*The doors lock on the cargo bay and an announcement goes throughout the ship,

"attention all crew members, grab your pulse rifles, phasers and other shooting weapons you ca find, its hunting season on ToeJam, he's in the cargo bay"

[ToeJam]

having heard the announcemnt over the speaker system. toe jam immediatly opens a small hatch that leads to the outside of the ship. toejam puts on some gravity boots and starts to walk on the ships outter hull until he reaches a nice bif flat shiny area.
ToeJam takes out his special paint cans and commences to write on the ships hull..

"Evil_Ginge is a meany and a nOOb"

below that he writes

"Gryffin wears corsets to hide his belly"

and below that

"LadyHawk is a fox"

after finishing his work he runs off to special part he knows off outside the ship.

[Evil_Ginge]

*a large mechanical arm grabs Toejam and uses his body to rub off the bit about Evil_Ginge and the bit about Gryffin, leaving the but about lady hawk the mechanical arm brings Toejam back inside the ship and dangles him from the roof of the cargo bay

[ToeJam]

while dangling from the roof of the cargo bay ToeJam starts to recite .. that Evil_Ginge is a closet boy-george fan club president and he has proof...

ToeJam uses his ever trusty nasty sock with the special jam dissolver to bust loose he then runs off....

[Evil_Ginge]

.. after of course falling 300 feet onto the cargo bay floor

[ToeJam]

Originally posted by Evil_Ginge
.. after of course falling 300 feet onto the cargo bay floor

ooc//point well taken\\\ooc

luckily for Toe Jam while he was hanging from the cargo bay ceilings his load of dirty clothes and those he washed earlier fell to the floor this helped break his fall .
ToeJam quickly puts evrything back into his sock pouch he then dones his cloaking sock(ala harry potter) that not only makes him invisible to the regular eye but also hides him from any type of scanning device..
ToeJam exits the room singing "i'm a smelly toe ,i'm a smelly toe and you cant see meeeeeee.......na na na na nana nana

[Gryffin]

*Gryffin follows the sound and the signature of ToeJam's mind unitl he is right behind ToeJam. He then shouts boo really loudly.*

"BBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

[ToeJam]

ToeJam hears the BBBOOOOOOOOOOOO and gets so scareed he jumps up on his way down he accidetnly hits Gryffin in the nose..
he realizes what just happened and starts to run of.
he lays down a slimy sock for anyone that follows him to fall on..

[J-Kama-Ka-C]

*J-Kama-Ka-C heads back into his office and brings up an isometric holomap of the ship so he can track 'the hunt' and intervein if nessisary

[ToeJam]

Toe Jam quietly enters Evil_Ginge sateroom.. he rummages thru until he finds what he is looking for..
he then runs over to Gryffin stateroom and again rummages thru unitl he finds what he is looking for.

having found the items in question he moves to the replicator that happens to be located near by..
he removes some more objects from his every trusty sock pouch and places them inside the replicator, going to the far wall that contains a master board for all the ships el;ectronics toe jam commences a little rewiring interfacing the teleporter and the duplicator. rigging it so that it cannot be shut down unless all power to the ship is turned off..with all this acomplished and having run a test he is satisfied.

he hits the start button. immediatly blow up love dolls with the face of boy george and wearing a corset and having 2 hearts on its left rear cheek with the words "i luv Evil_Ginge" on 1 and "Gryffin is my slave dog" on the other commence to appear in random all over the ship..

of course the 1 st appear at J-Kama-Ka-C office


smiling at his handy work Toe Jam heads out to the mess hall for a good chili & carne with a hot dog and soda lunch

*all the guns stop working and Wo2 is seen running down the hall way yelling*

MINE MINE MINE.

[ooc] yess i'm gonig some what mad [ooc]

[Evil_Ginge]

*The internal guns easily make vapour of the items of clothing as they are placed, before anyone can view them

[ToeJam]

Toe Jam see's wo2 runing down the hall with arms full of guns and yelling "MINE MINE MINE"

Toe Jam chases him down and remove 2 guns and starts yelling
" MINE MINE MIE"

*Wo2 turns around and starts firing all his new guns at toejam.*

GIVE GIVE GIVE

[ToeJam]

Toe Jam is saved from wo2 blaster as at that exact moment 5
love dolls with the face of boy george wearing a corset and having 2 hearts on its left rear cheek with the words "i luv Evil_Ginge" on 1 and "Gryffin is my slave dog" appear in the space between Toe Jam and wo2.

Toe Jam continues running down the hall laughing and yelling
" MINE MIINE MINE "

*wo2 picks up the dolls and keeps firing*

GIVE GIVE GIVE

[Lady Hawk]

there is a sort of wheezing and gasping sound but mechanical as a rather strange blue Police box (circa 1950's) turns up on the Cargo deck of the ship

A bloke with long curly hair and a massive multi coloured scarf throws a blue flight suited female out of ther doors

".....and B****Y well stay out, you dirty hitch hiking b***h, you will not freeload on this miracle of technology....and another thing K-9 is not a "nice doggy"

with that the blue ploice box disappears leaving the female figure alone in space..

Errrrr....hello....helloooooo.....S**T where am i now???????

[ToeJam]

Toe Jam runs by the cargo bay and happens to see a very skantly but great looking female loitering around .. he reahces into his ever handy dandy sock pouch and pulls out a sock with a purple rose painted on it.. he throws it at the femal and conitunes running

yelling

" MINE MINE MINE"

fyi wo2 should be chasing me carrying and armfull of guns and
5 love dolls with the face of boy george wearing a corset and having 2 hearts on its left rear cheek with the words "i luv Evil_Ginge" on 1 and "Gryffin is my slave dog"

[J-Kama-Ka-C]

*J-Kama-Ka-C spins around in his chair for a moment and then wheels himself over to the ops station, to at least try and stop the replicator overload. He picks up the comm

"UH UGH UGH ...er... I mean, this is your captain speaking, we are experiencing some technical differculties, please hold your breath for the next seven seconds while the power core reboots, life support will not be available during this time, thankyou"

*He presses the shipwide reset button and all the lights, engines, etc go out momentarily. The main view screen flashes:

_
System ready...

(That's enough of my obscere JP parody, since I don't recall the outcome, only that it involves a T-Rex, some raptors and a large computer programmer in a hawaiin shirt)

[Gryffin]

*Gryffin finds the origional replicator, and destroys the hateful items inside. He hadn't even known that such things existed. Then he goes down towards the fighter bays to see if his beautiful fighter has been tampered with, and finds Lady Hawk.*

"Hello. Have you seen a small man with a lot of socks? It is just we are trying to kill him, and he keeps running away. Most irritating, don't you think?"