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19 Sep 2005, 10:00
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#1
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I am an idiot
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 2,145
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It is Official
I am going mental.
Trying to put my debit card into the railway turnstiles and buy groceries with my travel card.
Man, being mental sucks!
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19 Sep 2005, 10:21
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#2
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 940
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Re: It is Official
I lost my wallet the other day.
Walked out into the hall.
Picket up the phone.
Its a shame I couldn't remember the wallet's phone number to call it .
Are you exceptionally tired at the moment CT? Thats my excuse.
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19 Sep 2005, 10:49
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#3
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Lord Denning
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: City of London
Posts: 2,548
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Re: It is Official
I once tried to get money out of a cash machine with my Trinity buttery card (effectively a College membership card).
At least I have the excuse of extreme drunkenness, though.
And no one was looking at the time.
__________________
Please bear in mind when reading the above post that I am always right.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
He was crowned in York Cathedral as 'Expert in the West' by Pope Urban III in 1186.
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19 Sep 2005, 11:50
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#4
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I am an idiot
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 2,145
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Re: It is Official
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrPeach
Are you exceptionally tired at the moment CT? Thats my excuse.
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Seeing as you mention it, yes I suppose I am. Been doing a lot of manual labour recently and I am tired to the bone. Literally.
Do you think that is the cause of my failing mind?
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19 Sep 2005, 12:05
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#5
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Not Dark or Handsome
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Cwmbru
Posts: 2,588
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Re: It is Official
I put a full cup of coffee in the bin a few nights ago (~4am) instead of the empty coffee jar. :/
__________________
"You can't drink a pint of Bovril."
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19 Sep 2005, 12:59
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#6
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________
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Somwhere I belong
Posts: 4,474
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Re: It is Official
CT:
So?
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by blink 182
Breathing deeply, walking backwards,
finding strength to call and ask her
Roller coaster favorite ride,
let me kiss you one last time.
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19 Sep 2005, 13:59
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#7
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I am an idiot
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 2,145
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Re: It is Official
Blasto:
Wasup?
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19 Sep 2005, 20:04
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#8
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Monkey Man
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: UK
Posts: 173
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Re: It is Official
Once, when cooking something in a saucepan and simultaneously boiling water in a kettle, I picked both up and left the saucepan where the kettle should be and the kettle on the hob.
After a couple of seconds I realised my mistake, which was pointed out most poignantly as the base of the kettle burst into flames.
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19 Sep 2005, 20:08
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#9
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Re: It is Official
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ephor
Once, when cooking something in a saucepan and simultaneously boiling water in a kettle, I picked both up and left the saucepan where the kettle should be and the kettle on the hob.
After a couple of seconds I realised my mistake, which was pointed out most poignantly as the base of the kettle burst into flames.
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First post in this thread thats actually made me laugh.
Things which explode/go on fire by accident are usually very amusing.
The Twin Towers for example. Or a London Tube Train. Maybe even a good old red London bus.
Top Bombing!
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And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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19 Sep 2005, 20:12
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#10
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Love's Sweet Exile
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Living on a Stair (Now Sword-less)
Posts: 2,371
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Re: It is Official
I once put my uni-card in a cash machine, and only noticed when it told me it was going to charge me to make a withdrawal...it let me enter my PIN, then choose to get cash without even querying anything :|
__________________
--SYMM--
Ba Ba Ti Ki Di Do
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19 Sep 2005, 21:07
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#11
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:alpha:
Join Date: May 2002
Location: London, UK
Posts: 7,871
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Re: It is Official
I once put my penis into another man's bottom by accident instead of my girlfriend's vagina!
Oh how we did laugh!
__________________
"There is no I in team, but there are two in anal fisting"
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19 Sep 2005, 21:10
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#12
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Next goal wins!
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: London
Posts: 5,406
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Re: It is Official
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tomkat
I once put my penis into another man's bottom by accident instead of my girlfriend's vagina!
Oh how we did laugh!
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stop pretending you had a girlfriend.
__________________
bastard bastard bastard bastard
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19 Sep 2005, 21:12
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#13
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Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2001
Posts: 482
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Re: It is Official
I once slid down a mountain on a bin liner and run over a shard of glass.
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19 Sep 2005, 23:46
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#14
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________
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Somwhere I belong
Posts: 4,474
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Re: It is Official
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tomkat
I once put my penis into another man's bottom by accident instead of my girlfriend's vagina!
Oh how we did laugh!
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O-k.
I thought it was your gf's anus?
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by blink 182
Breathing deeply, walking backwards,
finding strength to call and ask her
Roller coaster favorite ride,
let me kiss you one last time.
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20 Sep 2005, 00:54
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#15
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WANNASEEMYNEWCHAINSAW
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Éire
Posts: 2,738
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Re: It is Official
I watched my cousin light a cigarette today with a match while talking on the phone, wave out the flame then throw away his phone.
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I came, I saw, I shouldn't mix pleasure with carpentry.
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20 Sep 2005, 01:58
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#16
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Still ace
Join Date: Sep 2004
Posts: 44
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Re: It is Official
I once pissed all over my sleeping wife
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20 Sep 2005, 02:06
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#17
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Queen of England
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: not where you think
Posts: 40
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Re: It is Official
I put water in a glass of milk the other day (thinking it was squash, I reckon). Tasted pretty shit.
(sup guys, anyone remember me?)
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hello
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20 Sep 2005, 02:44
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#18
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so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
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Re: It is Official
A couple of months ago i forgot you needed to put your travel card through the barriers at the Underground.
I was stopped rather abruptly at groin/waist height.
DAMN CAPITALISTS!
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
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20 Sep 2005, 05:33
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#19
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mmm.. pills
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: Australia
Posts: 2,152
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Re: It is Official
As a couple of recent examples, I've attempted to extract money from the cash machine using my house keys, only realising when they wouldn't fit in the slot.. sadley I've actually done this twice.
Also at work the phone was ringing, but instead I attempted to pickup the tape dispenser and answer it.
you wonder why you do these stupud things sometimes.
__________________
CSS : the result of letting artists design something only an engineer should touch.
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20 Sep 2005, 05:48
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#20
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not the daddy...
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Chino Hills, CA.
Posts: 117
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Re: It is Official
Quote:
Originally Posted by CrashTester
I am going mental.
Trying to put my debit card into the railway turnstiles and buy groceries with my travel card.
Man, being mental sucks!
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I just stormed through the house looking for my garage key. Cursed my roommates for possibly having lost it...ripped through my drawers, pack, and furniture...
...in defeat, I reached into my pajama pockets to grab a smoke and think about where it might be...
Bloody hell, right in my pocket...folded up in my pouch of tobacco.
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Discussions in general...
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20 Sep 2005, 06:02
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#21
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USS Oklahoma
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,500
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Re: It is Official
At my age, the really unusual thing is when I go through an entire day without doing something indicating I am losing my mind.
__________________
Ignorance is curable, stupidity is not.
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20 Sep 2005, 10:06
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#22
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I am an idiot
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 2,145
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Re: It is Official
Oh yeah, the other day I was over talking to a guy at work and as I leant on his desk to look at something on his screen he flapped about a bit and told me to mind his glasses and not lean on them. We both looked at where I was leaning and there were no glasses!
He had them on
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20 Sep 2005, 10:08
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#23
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I am an idiot
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 2,145
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Re: It is Official
Quote:
Originally Posted by IncubusGod
I watched my cousin light a cigarette today with a match while talking on the phone, wave out the flame then throw away his phone.
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That is quite funny
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20 Sep 2005, 10:14
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#24
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nomen est omen
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Bristol, UK
Posts: 1,095
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Re: It is Official
Quote:
Originally Posted by CrashTester
Oh yeah, the other day I was over talking to a guy at work and as I leant on his desk to look at something on his screen he flapped about a bit and told me to mind his glasses and not lean on them. We both looked at where I was leaning and there were no glasses!
He had them on
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Try looking for your glasses whilst wearing them. I`ve done that before. It takes ages trying to find them.
__________________
Me=Hans_Blix
Views expressed are those of the author and not of any company or organisation I am associated with. Electronic communication can be forged and the integrity of this message is not guaranteed.
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20 Sep 2005, 10:33
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#25
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wild one
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: River Edge, NJ
Posts: 3,313
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Re: It is Official
I put 20 pence in the coke machine yesterday then complained to the internal tech guy's that the coffee machine wasn't giving me my coffee and had taken my money.
Thank god I'm moving away.
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20 Sep 2005, 10:52
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#26
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NEWSBOT
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: The enby cave!
Posts: 4,872
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Re: It is Official
Quote:
Originally Posted by laney
I put water in a glass of milk the other day (thinking it was squash, I reckon). Tasted pretty shit.
(sup guys, anyone remember me?)
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no
__________________
[20:27:47] <nodrog-aawy> **** i think my housemate just caught me masturbating
[11:25:32] <idimmu> you are a little piggy arent you
[13:17:00] <KaneED> i'm so closet i'm like narnia
__________________
Pretty parks and funky scrap metal things here
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20 Sep 2005, 11:01
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#27
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Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2001
Posts: 482
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Re: It is Official
Quote:
Originally Posted by CrashTester
That is quite funny
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Agreed.
In fact, the whole thread has turned into a right hoot
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20 Sep 2005, 11:09
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#28
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Hi there ...
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 481
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Re: It is Official
Quote:
Originally Posted by skiddy
I put 20 pence in the coke machine yesterday then complained to the internal tech guy's that the coffee machine wasn't giving me my coffee and had taken my money.
Thank god I'm moving away.
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20 pence for a coffee - wow cheap - 1 step closer to paradise
__________________
#Reunion
[Ascendancy] - While you were trying, we were sleeping
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20 Sep 2005, 11:43
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#29
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I am an idiot
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 2,145
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Re: It is Official
Quote:
Originally Posted by sword
Agreed.
In fact, the whole thread has turned into a right hoot
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DYB does it again!
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20 Sep 2005, 12:31
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#30
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nomen est omen
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Bristol, UK
Posts: 1,095
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Re: It is Official
A few years ago, one of my then lecturers (we used to call him "Grand dad" because of his age, maner, forgetfullness and generally likeable "fuddy duddiness", the girls loved him) took his two grandsons out shopping in the car one day; to some large out of town complex whos name I now forget. He leaves the kids in the car, and goes and does the shopping. After shopping he leaves the building and takes the train home. It`s only when he gets home, everyone asks "Where are the kids?"
__________________
Me=Hans_Blix
Views expressed are those of the author and not of any company or organisation I am associated with. Electronic communication can be forged and the integrity of this message is not guaranteed.
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