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7 Nov 2005, 17:20
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#1
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Vermin Supreme
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 3,280
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Apparently Americans Are Fat And Lazy
this is a 'halloween thread', but i've been busy lately.
We moved into a house last summer. we share it with someone else, but we have the front door/front porch etc, so come halloween, we figured on having trick or treaters. Especially because our neighborhood is loaded with kiddies of the candy procuring age. Anyway. We bought tons of candy. We were prepared. And on the appointed hour, they came out in force; up and down our street.
But not to our door.
In fact, not to any door on our side of the street. Curious behavior. Talking with our neighbor, it turns out our side of the street never gets action. You see, there is a slight hill going down to the street on our side, and as a result, the houses on our side have ~4 more steps up to the front doors on average than the houses on the other side
'fat' and 'lazy'.
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7 Nov 2005, 17:26
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#2
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share the <3
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Location: Location:
Posts: 2,709
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Re: Apparently Americans Are Fat And Lazy
i loathe your country for infesting the pure heritage of my land with this blatant begging. Trick or ****ing treat, HOW ABOUT I ****ING RAPE YOU. I give them sweets they throw them on the floor and run off in search of money. ****s.
you should advertise sweets with higher sugar content to offset the calorie defecit
__________________
Sophie is hotter than you
though ive gone off her now; the way Susanna Reid squirms around on sml is, however, awesome
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7 Nov 2005, 17:33
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#3
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Next goal wins!
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: London
Posts: 5,406
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Re: Apparently Americans Are Fat And Lazy
I gave a couple of them a pringle each on halloween, and the ungrateful little bastards shoved them back through the letterbox.
In my day I would have been happy with a pringle (not that I ever went trick or treating).
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bastard bastard bastard bastard
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7 Nov 2005, 17:42
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#4
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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Re: Apparently Americans Are Fat And Lazy
in Croydon their were kids standing in the middle of the high street with their hands out for sweets in the middle of the day at the beginning of October.
Never seen that anywhere else before.
None of the little shits came to our house though.
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7 Nov 2005, 18:19
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#5
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USS Oklahoma
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,500
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Re: Apparently Americans Are Fat And Lazy
Quote:
Originally Posted by acropolis
'fat' and 'lazy'.
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First of all, I will note that this condemnation comes from someone who took an entire week to work up the enegy to post a halloween thread.
However, bypassing that, I would chalk it up to efficiency rather than sloth.
When I was a kid, my house was on one side of the stree and on the other side of the street was a railroad track. No one, not even me bothered to trick or treat on my block as it was a waste of precious time. The next block over had houses on both sides and we regularly started there so that we could get to the most houses with the fewest possible steps thus meaning that we got more candy during the 2-21/2 hours that we had to procure our hoard.
Walking up the extra steps would cut down on the toatal take for the night. Enterprising young capitalists of course want to maximize their return on their investment.
__________________
Ignorance is curable, stupidity is not.
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7 Nov 2005, 18:21
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#6
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Klaatu barada nikto
Join Date: Mar 2000
Location: St. Paul, Minnesota
Posts: 3,237
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Re: Apparently Americans Are Fat And Lazy
Quote:
Originally Posted by acropolis
this is a 'halloween thread', but i've been busy lately.
We moved into a house last summer. we share it with someone else, but we have the front door/front porch etc, so come halloween, we figured on having trick or treaters. Especially because our neighborhood is loaded with kiddies of the candy procuring age. Anyway. We bought tons of candy. We were prepared. And on the appointed hour, they came out in force; up and down our street.
But not to our door.
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Is it a duplex? Multiple family dwellings are generally poor pickings for trick-or-treaters, especially when they have a shared entrance. You have to go through an outer door, which sometimes is locked, and then buzz the individual units, who often won't answer. They also tend to have a higher proportion of single/childless residents who are less likely to be home. It seems counterintuitive, but you end up wasting more time for fewer treats at mutlple family units. It's all about time management.
There's also the problem with crossing the street--most parents won't let their children cross the street except at a corner, so they have to work one side of the street at the time. When they get to the corner, they have more options then simply coming back on the other side of the street.
I walked ten blocks with my daughter and we only hit both sides of the same street once (Summit Avenue, the motherlode of St. Paul trick-or-treating).
Quote:
In fact, not to any door on our side of the street. Curious behavior. Talking with our neighbor, it turns out our side of the street never gets action. You see, there is a slight hill going down to the street on our side, and as a result, the houses on our side have ~4 more steps up to the front doors on average than the houses on the other side
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My street has a similar behavior. Our side of the street, which faces south, is mostly large single-family homes with big porches and we gets tons of trick-or-treaters. The other side of the street, which faces north, is mostly duplexes, fourplexes and apartment buildings--they get virtually no trick-or-treaters.
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The Ottawa Citizen and Southam News wish to apologize for our apology to Mark Steyn, published Oct. 22. In correcting the incorrect statements about Mr. Steyn published Oct. 15, we incorrectly published the incorrect correction. We accept and regret that our original regrets were unacceptable and we apologize to Mr. Steyn for any distress caused by our previous apology.
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7 Nov 2005, 18:22
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#7
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Next goal wins!
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: London
Posts: 5,406
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Re: Apparently Americans Are Fat And Lazy
Quote:
Originally Posted by dda
First of all, I will note that this condemnation comes from someone who took an entire week to work up the enegy to post a halloween thread.
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Can someone load the :iceburn: smiley so i can edit this post with it, thanks.
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bastard bastard bastard bastard
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7 Nov 2005, 19:03
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#8
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2000
Posts: 8,476
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Re: Apparently Americans Are Fat And Lazy
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ste
in Croydon their were kids standing in the middle of the high street with their hands out for sweets in the middle of the day at the beginning of October.
Never seen that anywhere else before.
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Why has Croydon been such a GD hot topic recently?
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7 Nov 2005, 19:05
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#9
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Vermin Supreme
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 3,280
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Re: Apparently Americans Are Fat And Lazy
Quote:
Originally Posted by dda
First of all, I will note that this condemnation comes from someone who took an entire week to work up the enegy to post a halloween thread.
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i see my fatness and laziness as only further proving my point.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tactitus
Is it a duplex?.
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nope. it's a straight up house, and the front door is unshared (other tenant uses the back door). and the other houses on its side are single family.
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7 Nov 2005, 19:10
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#10
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Bored
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
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Re: Apparently Americans Are Fat And Lazy
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nodrog
Why has Croydon been such a GD hot topic recently?
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Because I moved here and feel the need to moan about it at every oppertunity.
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7 Nov 2005, 20:44
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#11
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Re: Apparently Americans Are Fat And Lazy
they come to the door here , they respect what they get and they sing as soon as you open the door.
"Hop tu Naa , me mothers gone away , she wont be back until another day"
Its quite sweet really. The other half , coming from Liverpool, was shocked, she figured theyd have knives or bats, or at least a loaded weapon.
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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7 Nov 2005, 21:00
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#12
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Reject False Icons
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Your Hotel.... Fee:$999
Posts: 896
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Re: Apparently Americans Are Fat And Lazy
here in glasgow a boy knocked on our door and asked if we had any crisps. I felt sorry for him and gave him some skips. come to think of it it was in may so wtf was he doing lol?
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The Illuminati- NoS
[]LCH[]- dc
-=Destiny=-
Wolfpack - Dc
xVx - DC
Apprime -_-
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7 Nov 2005, 21:15
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#13
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The Twilight of the Gods
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 23,481
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Re: Apparently Americans Are Fat And Lazy
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rinoa
here in glasgow a boy knocked on our door and asked if we had any crisps. I felt sorry for him and gave him some skips. come to think of it it was in may so wtf was he doing lol?
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i dont kno lol
Maybe he was an enterprising young scamp, the kind which I hear tales of by the fire.
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8 Nov 2005, 12:20
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#14
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: Apparently Americans Are Fat And Lazy
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nodrog
Why has Croydon been such a GD hot topic recently?
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That's where all the GD orgies are now based.
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8 Nov 2005, 17:57
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#15
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deserves a medal
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,211
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Re: Apparently Americans Are Fat And Lazy
Next year just throw fitness candy at their heads and hope they eat it and get even fatter
__________________
"I have with me two gods, Persuasion and Compulsion."
Last edited by Alessio; 8 Nov 2005 at 18:02.
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