User Name
Password

Go Back   Planetarion Forums > Non Planetarion Discussions > General Discussions

Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
Unread 12 Dec 2005, 22:57   #1
Tomkat
:alpha:
 
Tomkat's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: London, UK
Posts: 7,871
Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Tales from the classroom

I thought I'd share a few mildly amusing stories from the classroom.

Merry Christmas ****ers!


The Shopping List

We were in the 3rd or 4th week of term.

Year 7 class. ICT.

That's the lowest age group. They've just come into the school, so we're still seeing how well they perform with ICT. The skill-level varies a lot with this age, based on usage at primary school, and at home.

It was a very simple task on Microsoft Word.

Data Inputting for one lesson, then some simple formatting for the second, with a bit of extension for the more competent.

So for the first lesson they were copying a menu onto Word, then if they finished it they'd format it with colours/pictures/borders/fontstyles etc.

There was one boy in the class - we'll call him Bob.

Bob has Aspergers. Not a very funny mental condition - he can take things very literally, and is very suggestible. He also gets easily wound up.

He's actually a ****ing nightmare and is one of the main reasons I'm about a lesson behind with this year 7 class compared to my "good" one.

I'm not making fun of Aspergers here. Don't think I am. It isn't funny at all.

Anyway, the boys were all happily typing away.

One boy wants to print off his work, but the printer isn't working.

I turn away and fiddle a bit with the printer (it had a minor paper jam, so nothing big).

The door is behind me.

I hear the door open and close.

This is quite unusual - all boys have to ask me if they want to leave the room to go to the loo or whatever.

Noone has come into the room, so I look around.

"Where's Bob?" I say.

One boy happily chirps up.

"Oh he went to Tescos to buy all the items on the menu"

It dawned on me what he meant.

I opened the door and pelted down the stairs.

Sure enough, there was Bob, about to head towards the front gates of the school, ready to go shopping for this "shopping list" I'd given him.

I never did find out which kid told him that it wasn't a menu at all, but a shopping list he needed to go and buy.

Little ****ers.



Island Ikeda

It was my first Business Studies lesson with my year 10s.

They'd just started their GCSE Business Studies course.

The first topic in it is "Needs and Wants" - very simple stuff.

The BS department likes to ease the pupils in gently, so has a little scenario to demonstrate needs and wants.

It's just a map of an imaginary island, with trees, rivers, and things on.

The pupils have to decide what they will do in the first 24 hours on the island, based on what they need and what they want.

They're only allowed what they could fit in a matchbox.

I tell the boys that the best answer will get a commendation (a reward thing).

So we go through a whole load of options, with boys telling me that in 24 hours they'll do everything from collecting water, to berries, to hunting wild boar, to felling entire trees.

Anyway, we get to the last boy. He's been quite quiet up until now (very unusual for him - he's a pretty big troublemaker now). We'll call him Rob.

I ask him what he'd put in the matchbox.

He tells me "I'd put a few condoms in Sir!"

The whole class laughs.

I went into about-to-punish mode, but I stopped - I thought I'd give him a chance.

"Yeah, what I'd do is fill it with water because they expand, and then drink the water on the way to the berries, then fill it with berries as much as possible, then try and camp under the trees sir"

"Right..."

He got the commendation. I was very impressed with his lateral thinking. I still think he just wanted to say "condom" in my class, though



The Excitable Pupil

Now this didn't happen to me.

My friend Greta told me about it (she's just started, like me).

Anyway, she was taking a class of year 10s too (15 year olds).

They were watching a film.

Films in class are miraculous - they seem to freeze every pupil, which is quite bizarre to see.

She saw something out of the corner of her eye though, as she was watching the film too.

It was a rhythmic motion from the corner, right at the back.

She turned slowly and watched the pupil out of the corner of her eye.

He was behind everyone else, so noone could see him.

Sure enough, he was cracking one off in her class.

"What should I do?" she thought.

She could have stopped him, but that would have scarred him for life and he would never have lived it down.

So she just let him finish it off, then wipe his hand on his friends bag, and continue watching the video.

Jeez.

It's stories like that that make me glad I'm a male teacher. Boys would never dream of wanking in a male teacher's class.
__________________
"There is no I in team, but there are two in anal fisting"
Tomkat is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 12 Dec 2005, 23:14   #2
_Kila_
break it down!
 
_Kila_'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 2,087
_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tomkat
I
Anyway, she was taking a class of year 10s too (15 year olds).
14-15. Calling them all 15 means I should be in Year 10, but I am intellectually superior to them (by a great deal)

But wanking in class? thats just sad...
_Kila_ is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 12 Dec 2005, 23:58   #3
Blastoderm
________
 
Blastoderm's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Somwhere I belong
Posts: 4,474
Blastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus would
Re: Tales from the classroom

Wanking in a class?

****ing hell, I went to an all-boys school and none of this ever happened.

South London for you eh?
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by blink 182
Breathing deeply, walking backwards,
finding strength to call and ask her
Roller coaster favorite ride,
let me kiss you one last time.
Blastoderm is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 00:40   #4
Superpig #1
^ ^ Clearly Stolen ^ ^
 
Superpig #1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Exeter
Posts: 753
Superpig #1 is infamous around these parts
Re: Tales from the classroom

Wanking in class, surely he would have been seen by a classmate??? Or heard?? And didnt a sound escape him when he "climaxed"?
__________________
This is a stick - |
This a squiggly line - S
This is a hole - o
This is a man in a wheelchair - &

and that was my sig.
Superpig #1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 00:42   #5
Blastoderm
________
 
Blastoderm's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Somwhere I belong
Posts: 4,474
Blastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus would
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by Superpig #1
Wanking in class, surely he would have been seen by a classmate??? Or heard?? And didnt a sound escape him when he "climaxed"?
Apparently, some guys don't let a sound out when they "climax"....

or some prostitute said at Soho.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by blink 182
Breathing deeply, walking backwards,
finding strength to call and ask her
Roller coaster favorite ride,
let me kiss you one last time.
Blastoderm is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 00:48   #6
_Kila_
break it down!
 
_Kila_'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 2,087
_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blastoderm
Wanking in a class?

****ing hell, I went to an all-boys school and none of this ever happened.

South London for you eh?
I go to a boys school in pretty much south London (Victoria = SW1 and most of the idiots here are from south London) and nothing like that has ever happened. Closest thing to it that I've heard of was a boy being caught behind a skip doing something, of course rumours said it was masturbating, but I dunno.

Quote:
Originally Posted by horn
you're brain's still growing, in a few years you'll think wanking in class would have been a fantastic idea !
i promise
I find masturbation wrong without the class bit, but doing it in class is just aweful.
_Kila_ is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 00:49   #7
Superpig #1
^ ^ Clearly Stolen ^ ^
 
Superpig #1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Exeter
Posts: 753
Superpig #1 is infamous around these parts
Re: Tales from the classroom

And then wiping it on his friends bag is just putting the icing on the cake. I wonder if his mate ever found out he has semen stains on his bag.

And surely there was a slight smell aswell?

Keep those stories coming (no jokes please) Tomkat mate.
__________________
This is a stick - |
This a squiggly line - S
This is a hole - o
This is a man in a wheelchair - &

and that was my sig.
Superpig #1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 00:51   #8
mist
Jolt's best friend
 
mist's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 2,101
mist is a name known to allmist is a name known to allmist is a name known to allmist is a name known to allmist is a name known to allmist is a name known to all
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by Superpig #1
And then wiping it on his friends bag is just putting the icing on the cake.
there has to be a monica + bill link in it somewhere, but i just can't see it :/
__________________
<Karmulian> subtle as a kick in the nuts as always
mist is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 00:52   #9
Superpig #1
^ ^ Clearly Stolen ^ ^
 
Superpig #1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Exeter
Posts: 753
Superpig #1 is infamous around these parts
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by _Kila_
I go to a boys school in pretty much south London (Victoria = SW1 and most of the idiots here are from south London) and nothing like that has ever happened. Closest thing to it that I've heard of was a boy being caught behind a skip doing something, of course rumours said it was masturbating, but I dunno.
In my school there was 2 6th formers that "allegedly" had sex in the toilets. We later found out this was true when my mate shouted out something and got chased around the school field for 10 minutes by an angry 6th former wearing tight jeans.
__________________
This is a stick - |
This a squiggly line - S
This is a hole - o
This is a man in a wheelchair - &

and that was my sig.
Superpig #1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 00:56   #10
Superpig #1
^ ^ Clearly Stolen ^ ^
 
Superpig #1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Exeter
Posts: 753
Superpig #1 is infamous around these parts
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nantoz
True story. I have on several occasions shocked some girls when I told them I came quite some time ago.
I am evidently not a "screamer"...
I'm no "screamer" either, but a satisfied "ahh" or making a sound like Hannibal Lecter has been heard to escape me.
__________________
This is a stick - |
This a squiggly line - S
This is a hole - o
This is a man in a wheelchair - &

and that was my sig.
Superpig #1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 02:50   #11
Knight Theamion
Miles Teg
 
Knight Theamion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Dom City
Posts: 5,192
Knight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like him
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by _Kila_
I find masturbation wrong without the class bit.


Eh? Explain.
__________________
Audentes Fortuna Iuvat
Knight Theamion is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 03:02   #12
vampire_lestat
Mathamagician
 
vampire_lestat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: At the very edge of existance
Posts: 1,803
vampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet society
Re: Tales from the classroom

how can a 15yo boy find masterbation wrong. Does not compute.
__________________
I think I just had an evilgasm
vampire_lestat is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 10:07   #13
Deepflow
Next goal wins!
 
Deepflow's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: London
Posts: 5,406
Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by vampire_lestat
how can a 15yo boy find masterbation wrong. Does not compute.
I think theres still some form of stigma about masturbation when you are 15, that could explain it to some extent.
__________________
bastard bastard bastard bastard
Deepflow is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 11:52   #14
Knight Theamion
Miles Teg
 
Knight Theamion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Dom City
Posts: 5,192
Knight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himKnight Theamion is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like him
Re: Tales from the classroom

No it can't, you know that as well as I do.
__________________
Audentes Fortuna Iuvat
Knight Theamion is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 14:55   #15
Marilyn Manson
Gone
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Exclamation Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nantoz
You're a handsome lad, Tommy boy. I wouldn't be surprised if quite a lot of your stil-closeted-semi-gay pupils wouldn't mind taking a wank to your thight, jeans-clad behind.
If you don't already write gay fiction - and frankly, I wouldn't be surprised - then you really should consider it.
Marilyn Manson is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 15:39   #16
Blastoderm
________
 
Blastoderm's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Somwhere I belong
Posts: 4,474
Blastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus would
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by vampire_lestat
how can a 15yo boy find masterbation wrong. Does not compute.
The thing is, you didn't say that you masturbate if you went to secondary school.... especially an all-boys school.

You'd get harrassed for it.

Everyone would think you can't get a girl to shag or jerk you off or something.

It's kinda what Deepflow said.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by blink 182
Breathing deeply, walking backwards,
finding strength to call and ask her
Roller coaster favorite ride,
let me kiss you one last time.
Blastoderm is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 15:54   #17
The Real Arfy
Registered User
 
The Real Arfy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 1,081
The Real Arfy has a reputation beyond reputeThe Real Arfy has a reputation beyond reputeThe Real Arfy has a reputation beyond reputeThe Real Arfy has a reputation beyond reputeThe Real Arfy has a reputation beyond reputeThe Real Arfy has a reputation beyond reputeThe Real Arfy has a reputation beyond reputeThe Real Arfy has a reputation beyond reputeThe Real Arfy has a reputation beyond reputeThe Real Arfy has a reputation beyond reputeThe Real Arfy has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blastoderm
Everyone would think you can't get a girl to shag or jerk you off or something.
Well in that case its a good job he crushed those accusations by knocking one out in class...
__________________
Dynamic Salvage!

[16:10:34] <[lfc]stif|afk> "dont be the worst in your alliance, join CT. We have Arfy!"
The Real Arfy is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 16:08   #18
vampire_lestat
Mathamagician
 
vampire_lestat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: At the very edge of existance
Posts: 1,803
vampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet society
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blastoderm
The thing is, you didn't say that you masturbate if you went to secondary school.... especially an all-boys school.

You'd get harrassed for it.

Everyone would think you can't get a girl to shag or jerk you off or something.

It's kinda what Deepflow said.
Dont get caught?
__________________
I think I just had an evilgasm
vampire_lestat is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 18:39   #19
Marilyn Manson
Gone
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Marilyn Manson has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Exclamation Re: Tales from the classroom

I've got the brains
You've got the looks
Let's make lots of money
You've got the brawn
I've got the brains
Let's make lots of...

I've had enough of scheming
and messing around with jerks
My car is parked outside
I'm afraid it doesn't work
I'm looking for a partner
someone who gets things fixed
Ask yourself this question
Do you want to be rich?

I've got the brains
You've got the looks
Let's make lots of money
You've got the brawn
I've got the brains
Let's make lots of money

You can tell I'm educated
I studied at the Sorbonne
Doctored in mathematics
I could have been a don
I can program a computer
choose the perfect time
If you've got the inclination
I have got the crime

Oh, there's a lot of opportunities
if you know when to take them
You know there's a lot of opportunities
if there aren't, you can make them
(Make or break them)

I've got the brains
You've got the looks
Let's make lots of money
Let's make lots of...
money

You can see I'm single-minded
I know what I could be
How'd you feel about it?
Come and take a walk with me
I'm looking for a partner
regardless of expense
Think about it seriously
You know it makes sense

Let's (Got the brains)
make (Got the looks)
Let's make lots of money (Oohh money)
(Let's) You've got the brawn
(make) I've got the brains
Let's make lots of money (Oohh money)
I've got the brains (Got the brains)
You've got the looks (Got the looks)
Let's make lots of money (Oohh money)
Money

All the love that we had
and the love that we hide
Who will bury us
when we die?
Marilyn Manson is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 19:29   #20
Belgarath The Sorcerer
First Disciple of Aldur
 
Belgarath The Sorcerer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: The Vale of Aldur
Posts: 1,470
Belgarath The Sorcerer has much to be proud ofBelgarath The Sorcerer has much to be proud ofBelgarath The Sorcerer has much to be proud ofBelgarath The Sorcerer has much to be proud ofBelgarath The Sorcerer has much to be proud ofBelgarath The Sorcerer has much to be proud ofBelgarath The Sorcerer has much to be proud ofBelgarath The Sorcerer has much to be proud ofBelgarath The Sorcerer has much to be proud of
Re: Tales from the classroom

That shit definately makes me want to apply to do a PGCE.
__________________
Yeah.
Belgarath The Sorcerer is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 20:06   #21
Deepflow
Next goal wins!
 
Deepflow's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: London
Posts: 5,406
Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by vampire_lestat
Dont get caught?
I dont want to get caught masturbating, it doesnt mean i dont do it or that i wont admit to it. In school it was different, there was barely even any admittance, especially at 15.
__________________
bastard bastard bastard bastard
Deepflow is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 22:38   #22
_Kila_
break it down!
 
_Kila_'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 2,087
_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by vampire_lestat
how can a 15yo boy find masterbation wrong. Does not compute.
by getting real pussy instead of settling for my hand?
_Kila_ is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 22:58   #23
Deepflow
Next goal wins!
 
Deepflow's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: London
Posts: 5,406
Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by _Kila_
by getting real pussy instead of settling for my hand?
AHAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAAHAAHHAAAAAA

I'm not saying that you don't get pussy btw, just that (especially at 15) you'll be wanking as well.
__________________
bastard bastard bastard bastard
Deepflow is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 23:00   #24
_Kila_
break it down!
 
_Kila_'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 2,087
_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society
Re: Tales from the classroom

Whats the point in using my hand if I can get the real thing? I really don't understand you people
_Kila_ is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 23:01   #25
JonnyBGood
Banned
 
JonnyBGood's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by _Kila_
Whats the point in using my hand if I can get the real thing? I really don't understand you people
Whenever I need sex I click my fingers and women magically appear.
























It's called porn lololololol.
__________________
Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
JonnyBGood is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 23:02   #26
Deepflow
Next goal wins!
 
Deepflow's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: London
Posts: 5,406
Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by _Kila_
Whats the point in using my hand if I can get the real thing? I really don't understand you people
The hand actually has numerous advantages over women.
__________________
bastard bastard bastard bastard
Deepflow is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 23:06   #27
Hicks
Raaaaaaaah!
 
Hicks's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 2,296
Hicks is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himHicks is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himHicks is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himHicks is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himHicks is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himHicks is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himHicks is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himHicks is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himHicks is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himHicks is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like himHicks is an inspiration to us all and we should try to be more like him
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by _Kila_
Whats the point in using my hand if I can get the real thing? I really don't understand you people
This is fine if you have the sex drive of an 80 year old I guess.
__________________
Hicks
Mercury & Solace
Always [Fury]
Hicks is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 23:06   #28
Ste
Bored
 
Ste's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: Tales from the classroom

you can cheat on it with your other hand and it doesn't mind
__________________
Wise men write because they have something to write about; fools write because they have to write something. - Plato

yeh so Plastic Brilliance is now known as FOXYSTOAT - Come on by and check it out!
Ste is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 23:08   #29
JonnyBGood
Banned
 
JonnyBGood's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ste
you can cheat on it with your other hand and it doesn't mind
Left hand wanking is difficult.
__________________
Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
JonnyBGood is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 23:10   #30
Deepflow
Next goal wins!
 
Deepflow's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: London
Posts: 5,406
Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
Left hand wanking is difficult.
I thought it was too, so i had this wonderful plan of moving the mousepad to the left of the keyboard.

I've never looked back.
__________________
bastard bastard bastard bastard
Deepflow is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 13 Dec 2005, 23:45   #31
Tomkat
:alpha:
 
Tomkat's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: London, UK
Posts: 7,871
Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: Tales from the classroom

When I have a girlfriend and steady regular sex I don't masturbate as much, but I still do it.

Less hassle, it's just a quick release and sexual relief, and it doesn't need cuddling after in bed.

Stop talking the talk Kila, we all know you masturbate. It's normal, quit worrying :P
__________________
"There is no I in team, but there are two in anal fisting"
Tomkat is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 14 Dec 2005, 00:15   #32
Fluffie
, Mr. Fluffie
 
Fluffie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Posts: 2,273
Fluffie is a splendid one to beholdFluffie is a splendid one to beholdFluffie is a splendid one to beholdFluffie is a splendid one to beholdFluffie is a splendid one to beholdFluffie is a splendid one to beholdFluffie is a splendid one to beholdFluffie is a splendid one to behold
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
Left hand wanking is difficult.
No it's not.
__________________
i want to cover her body with apple pie and eat it off her
Fluffie is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 14 Dec 2005, 00:19   #33
Ste
Bored
 
Ste's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Nottm ->Shef ->Croydon ->Manc ->Durham ->Sheffield
Posts: 6,506
Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Ste has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by horn
just don't use "ultra soft" kleenex.
They've got some weird gloss on them that seems to stop the cum absorbing into the tissue, possibly leading to spillidge.
mum's the word.
Ask skiddy about his sock pile
__________________
Wise men write because they have something to write about; fools write because they have to write something. - Plato

yeh so Plastic Brilliance is now known as FOXYSTOAT - Come on by and check it out!
Ste is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 14 Dec 2005, 00:49   #34
Blastoderm
________
 
Blastoderm's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Somwhere I belong
Posts: 4,474
Blastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus would
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
Right hand wanking is difficult.
Fixed.

(Even though I'm right-handed)
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by blink 182
Breathing deeply, walking backwards,
finding strength to call and ask her
Roller coaster favorite ride,
let me kiss you one last time.
Blastoderm is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 14 Dec 2005, 00:54   #35
_Kila_
break it down!
 
_Kila_'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 2,087
_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tomkat
Stop talking the talk Kila, we all know you masturbate. It's normal, quit worrying :P
Seriously... I don't :|
Probably cause I've grown up using the word "wanker" a lot and now have a mentality that says it is bad ergo wanking is bad.
_Kila_ is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 14 Dec 2005, 00:57   #36
vampire_lestat
Mathamagician
 
vampire_lestat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: At the very edge of existance
Posts: 1,803
vampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet societyvampire_lestat is a pillar of this Internet society
Re: Tales from the classroom

This is clearly what man-size cleenex was invented for.
__________________
I think I just had an evilgasm
vampire_lestat is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 14 Dec 2005, 00:57   #37
Deepflow
Next goal wins!
 
Deepflow's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: London
Posts: 5,406
Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Deepflow has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: Tales from the classroom

good pop psychology there chum.

If everyone who used the word "wanker" didnt wank then there would be an awful lot of very frustrated people going about.
__________________
bastard bastard bastard bastard
Deepflow is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 14 Dec 2005, 00:57   #38
Blastoderm
________
 
Blastoderm's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Somwhere I belong
Posts: 4,474
Blastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus would
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by _Kila_
Whats the point in using my hand if I can get the real thing? I really don't understand you people
What happens if you can't get "the real thing"?

Seriously, I think every human being has at least wanked some time in their life.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by blink 182
Breathing deeply, walking backwards,
finding strength to call and ask her
Roller coaster favorite ride,
let me kiss you one last time.
Blastoderm is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 14 Dec 2005, 00:58   #39
JonnyBGood
Banned
 
JonnyBGood's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.JonnyBGood has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by _Kila_
Seriously... I don't :|
Probably cause I've grown up using the word "wanker" a lot and now have a mentality that says it is bad ergo wanking is bad.
Are you seriously claiming you've never jerked one off? Ever? Did you not watch that masterclass of cinematic art, forty days and forty nights? Do you not know the discomfort you are forcing on your body? Oh won't somebody please think of the children
__________________
Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
JonnyBGood is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 14 Dec 2005, 01:13   #40
_Kila_
break it down!
 
_Kila_'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 2,087
_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society_Kila_ is a pillar of this Internet society
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blastoderm
What happens if you can't get "the real thing"?
I go to sleep
Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
Are you seriously claiming you've never jerked one off? Ever? Did you not watch that masterclass of cinematic art, forty days and forty nights? Do you not know the discomfort you are forcing on your body? Oh won't somebody please think of the children
I've thought about it before but then thought: **** it. For some reason
_Kila_ is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 14 Dec 2005, 01:21   #41
Blastoderm
________
 
Blastoderm's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Somwhere I belong
Posts: 4,474
Blastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus wouldBlastoderm spreads love and joy to the forum in the same way Jesus would
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by _Kila_
I go to sleep
What if you can't sleep because you're thinking about you're not getting "the real thing"? What do you do then?
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by blink 182
Breathing deeply, walking backwards,
finding strength to call and ask her
Roller coaster favorite ride,
let me kiss you one last time.
Blastoderm is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 14 Dec 2005, 01:27   #42
Dante Hicks
Clerk
 
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
Dante Hicks has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dante Hicks has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dante Hicks has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dante Hicks has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dante Hicks has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dante Hicks has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dante Hicks has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dante Hicks has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dante Hicks has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dante Hicks has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Dante Hicks has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: Tales from the classroom

To be fair I remember when I was a kid calling someone a "wanker" was a major insult. People would deny wanking all the time.

Now of course it's quite the opposite with people probably exaggerating the amount they wank. I would seriously think any (male) who didn't masturbate by the age of 16 or so probably had some psychological issues brought about by a weird upbringing.
Dante Hicks is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 14 Dec 2005, 05:13   #43
TheBerk
dazed and confused
 
TheBerk's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Defford
Posts: 379
TheBerk has a brilliant futureTheBerk has a brilliant futureTheBerk has a brilliant futureTheBerk has a brilliant futureTheBerk has a brilliant futureTheBerk has a brilliant futureTheBerk has a brilliant futureTheBerk has a brilliant futureTheBerk has a brilliant futureTheBerk has a brilliant futureTheBerk has a brilliant future
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deepflow
I thought it was too, so i had this wonderful plan of moving the mousepad to the left of the keyboard.

I've never looked back.

I tried that, I just cannot use my mouse with my left hand, so I learnt to wank left handed instead after getting fed up of having to stop every now and then to use the mouse .

I've never looked back*.




















*Except for the time I had my computer desk on the wall opposite my door, then I loked back every time i heard someone come up the stairs.. Oh the paranoia, moved the desk soon after that.
__________________
rats live on no evil star
TheBerk is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 14 Dec 2005, 07:51   #44
Tomkat
:alpha:
 
Tomkat's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: London, UK
Posts: 7,871
Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.Tomkat has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: Tales from the classroom

Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
Oh won't somebody please think of the children
Paging Dace to thread 2970773!
__________________
"There is no I in team, but there are two in anal fisting"
Tomkat is offline   Reply With Quote
Unread 15 Dec 2005, 23:06   #45
dda
USS Oklahoma
 
dda's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,500
dda has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.dda has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.dda has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.dda has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.dda has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.dda has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.dda has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.dda has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.dda has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.dda has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.dda has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: Tales from the classroom

THE SHOPPING LIST/response

When I was in school and was 15, there was a kid named Phillip who was in several of my classes. I have, upon reflection, concluded that he had Aspurgers. When attendance was taken in classes at my school, the teacher would write down the names of all of those not attending on a slip of paper and place it on a clip outside the door from which it was collected. It was a simple clip. Push on one part and the jaw opens. Release and it closes.
On this particular day, the teacher took role and then asked Phillip to go put the attendance slip out. Phillip went out the door and the door closed behind him. The teacher was doing a problem on the board in front of the class. After about ten minutes the teacher noticed that Phillip hadn't returned so he went to the door and opened it and Phillip was standing staring at the clip. The class erupted in laughter and Phillip looked through the door and said, "I'm not mechanically inclined."

ISLAND IKEDA/response

I thought that the student was going to say that he wanted the condoms because if he were stuck on such an island he would be f**cked.

THE EXCITABLE PUPIL/response

When I was in school, about 13-14 years of age. It became common knowledge that one of the kids in the class had admitted to masturbating. He was teased mercilessly teased by virtually everyone with the sing song phrase

David the masturbater
He is a woman hater.

I found it very witty at the time and I was also perplexed as to why one would masturbate. However, I later found out.
__________________
Ignorance is curable, stupidity is not.
dda is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools
Display Modes

Forum Jump


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 23:58.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright ©2002 - 2018