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14 Oct 2005, 02:14
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#1
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Vermin Supreme
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 3,280
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Your Next Car Accident
This thread is about introspection. You look at your driving, and predict your next car accident. Then you go out and do what it takes to prove yourself right. Or don't. Would make a better thread if you did tho.
Anyway. I'm pretty confident that my next (first) accident will involve me turning left* through a green light, and because I'm watching for oncoming traffic I will find out about the people in the crosswalk to the left from the thumps they make under my tires.
I believe this because I've already had several close calls, and I don't seem to be learning.
*for you wacky brits replace all lefts with rights and this will make more sense.
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14 Oct 2005, 02:15
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#2
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I am.
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 6,580
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
cabbies don't/(better not if they value their lower class hides) ever crash
so i'm safe
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hi
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14 Oct 2005, 02:32
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#3
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Insanity Prawn Boy!
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: In a bush where you can't find me
Posts: 2,474
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yahwe
cabbies don't/(better not if they value their lower class hides) ever crash
so i'm safe
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even if they do crash, you'd be insured. As long as it was a Black Cab. Had quite an interesting conversation with a cabby about this last night
__________________
They shall not grow old, as we who are left grow old:
Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning
We shall remember them.
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14 Oct 2005, 02:34
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#4
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The brother of Spammer
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Paisley - Scotland
Posts: 2,352
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Quote:
Originally Posted by acropolis
I believe this because I've already had several close calls, and I don't seem to be learning. .
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All you can do is keep your speed down in town driving. Just reduce the risk of it happening.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yahwe
cabbies don't/(better not if they value their lower class hides) ever crash so i'm safe.
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Surprised you aint giving out business cards saying... If you have been in an accident and someone else is to blame.
No win no fee FTW.
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14 Oct 2005, 02:38
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#5
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Insanity Prawn Boy!
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: In a bush where you can't find me
Posts: 2,474
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Quote:
Originally Posted by buddies
Surprised you aint giving out business cards saying... If you have been in an accident and someone else is to blame.
No win no fee FTW.
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i think you'll find that Yahwe only deals with Criminal cases, none of this "I did something stupid and want money for it" rubbish
__________________
They shall not grow old, as we who are left grow old:
Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning
We shall remember them.
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14 Oct 2005, 02:54
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#6
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Vermin Supreme
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 3,280
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Quote:
Originally Posted by Demon Dave
i think you'll find that Yahwe only deals with Criminal cases, none of this "I did something stupid and want money for it" rubbish
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"I did something stupid and I don't want to face consequences"?
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14 Oct 2005, 02:54
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#7
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I am.
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 6,580
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Quote:
Originally Posted by buddies
Surprised you aint giving out business cards saying... If you have been in an accident and someone else is to blame.
No win no fee FTW.
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I can't be employed by the public.
the wonders of a gentlemanly profession ...
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hi
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14 Oct 2005, 02:56
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#8
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I am.
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 6,580
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Quote:
Originally Posted by Demon Dave
i think you'll find that Yahwe only deals with Criminal cases, none of this "I did something stupid and want money for it" rubbish
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actually I don't
I did a wonderful bit of work on the Belgian Law of commercial agency.
BUT it is soooooooooooooo less exciting to talk about
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hi
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14 Oct 2005, 08:40
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#9
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Heh, Leeds !
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In The Redfern
Posts: 3,790
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yahwe
cabbies don't/(better not if they value their lower class hides) ever crash
so i'm safe
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However plenty of people crash into cabbies.
True Story.
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The George Harrison of BlueTuba
Yes, I know he is dead !
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14 Oct 2005, 10:34
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#10
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Lord Denning
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: City of London
Posts: 2,548
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
If I do crash, it'll be because some stupid old lady from my village hasn't quite worked out that you drive on the left/put your lights on at night/indicate before turning/don't drive whilst under the influence of old age, etc.
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Please bear in mind when reading the above post that I am always right.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
He was crowned in York Cathedral as 'Expert in the West' by Pope Urban III in 1186.
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14 Oct 2005, 11:06
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#11
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BlueTuba
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 6,339
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
your next accident could be your last.
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"Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
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14 Oct 2005, 11:08
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#12
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uber pe0n
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 87
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Quote:
Originally Posted by Proteus
...don't drive whilst under the influence of old age, etc.
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That is quite possibly one of the best lines of text i think i have ever read. [/offtopic]
For some reason all my crashes (3 so far) have been collisions at under 10 miles an hour but the worst thing about it is that all the cars I have hit have been stationary.
Does that make me a terrible driver?*
*Don't answer that...I already know the answer.
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Personally its not God I dislike, its his fan club I cant stand
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14 Oct 2005, 11:25
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#13
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NEWSBOT
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: The enby cave!
Posts: 4,872
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
yes yes it does.
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[20:27:47] <nodrog-aawy> **** i think my housemate just caught me masturbating
[11:25:32] <idimmu> you are a little piggy arent you
[13:17:00] <KaneED> i'm so closet i'm like narnia
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Pretty parks and funky scrap metal things here
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14 Oct 2005, 11:50
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#14
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Godfather
Join Date: May 2000
Location: England
Posts: 5,185
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
It will involve a fairly high speed collision with a fox or somesuch. I doubt much would happen bar damage to the front of the car and the Fox's demise.
I travel back from going out late at night too quickly sometimes :-(
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Forum Administrator
Mail : [email protected] // IRC : #forums
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It's not personal, it's just business.
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14 Oct 2005, 11:54
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#15
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Lucky
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: -
Posts: 3,830
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
my next car accident will be caused by a woman.
or a muslim.
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14 Oct 2005, 12:37
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#16
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:alpha:
Join Date: May 2002
Location: London, UK
Posts: 7,871
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
I'm pretty sure I need to re-pass my test again.
It's scheduled for December!
Then I'll probably end up drink driving again and kill myself.
WINNER
AT
LIFE
(DEATH)
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"There is no I in team, but there are two in anal fisting"
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14 Oct 2005, 12:57
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#17
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 3,174
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Quote:
Originally Posted by lokken
your next accident could be your last.
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Theres always one bringing down the atmosphere
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If one person is in delusion, they're called insane.
If many people are in delusion, it's called a religion.
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14 Oct 2005, 15:47
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#18
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
I don't drive, never had in my life, have no intention of starting anytime soon.
That seems easy enough to fulfil.
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14 Oct 2005, 16:43
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#19
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mmm lambs
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: London
Posts: 1,906
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Mine will probably be on the way into Cardiff. Coming up to a junction the left hand lane splits into two and the right hand lane curves right a bit. Quite a few times when moving into this middle lane I have had someone nearly crash into me after they just went straight on from the right hand lane.
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I drink therefore I am
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14 Oct 2005, 16:52
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#20
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Avenger of Calamari
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 939
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
I imagine my next one will be something with striking similarity to me bouncing off of someone's windshield. I don't drive as of yet (Paying out the nose for insurance is fun. no, really it is) so thus the only car accident I'm gonna come up with is some moron running a light while I'm on the crosswalk.
If I do start driving anytime soon... I'll probably be hitting some poor defenseless 200 pound critter who I didn't see in the dead of night on a highway. The moment I start driving, I'm heading to the mountains for a few weeks of camping (all ye critters out there be warned! )
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14 Oct 2005, 17:05
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#21
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Next goal wins!
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: London
Posts: 5,406
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
well, i dont drive, but hopefully it will be like the last one. I was just crossing the road on the way to work and a car went into my leg and knocked me a couple of feet. It hurt for about 5 minutes.
I'm not sure ill get the chance though as i almost walked in front of a tram yesterday.
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bastard bastard bastard bastard
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14 Oct 2005, 18:31
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#22
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Klaatu barada nikto
Join Date: Mar 2000
Location: St. Paul, Minnesota
Posts: 3,237
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
I suspect my next accident will be a lot like the previous four.
I'll be sitting at an uncontrolled intersection waiting to turn left*, with my turn signal on thankyouverymuch, and some inattentive moron will plow into the back of my vehicle. My most recent was when a priest driving a rented Ford Taurus rear-ended me** and nearly totaled my Civic.
I've modified all my usual routes to eliminate as many left turns as I can, but I figure it's only a matter of time before someone gets me again.
Tip: don't turn your wheels while waiting to turn left* because if you do and you get rear-ended the impact will push you into the path of oncoming traffic. :/
*right for you Brits
**insert gay priest joke here
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The Ottawa Citizen and Southam News wish to apologize for our apology to Mark Steyn, published Oct. 22. In correcting the incorrect statements about Mr. Steyn published Oct. 15, we incorrectly published the incorrect correction. We accept and regret that our original regrets were unacceptable and we apologize to Mr. Steyn for any distress caused by our previous apology.
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15 Oct 2005, 00:20
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#23
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USS Oklahoma
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,500
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
I don't drive, never had in my life, have no intention of starting anytime soon.
That seems easy enough to fulfil.
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Then your next accident would probably be being run over while lying drunk in the gutter (or am I thinking of JBG?).
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Ignorance is curable, stupidity is not.
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15 Oct 2005, 01:02
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#24
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WANNASEEMYNEWCHAINSAW
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Éire
Posts: 2,738
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Mine will no doubt be me being creamed from the side by a bunch of asylum seekers in a shitty 1995 Ford Orion with no tax, insurance or licence, who've driven through a stop sign at a crossroads.
I say this because it's almost happened me 3 times in the past month.
3 ****ing times. All on the main street in the city. They just drive right across it from side streets.
I also say this because it's happened to my ex also. Some bint drove through a stop sign at an intersection and plowed into her at about 30mph. Putting her in hospital for 3 days.
No insurance. Learner Licence. Driving alone.
Fs.
Clearly African countries have yet to adopt hexagonal signs that tell you to stop at dangerous junctions.
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I came, I saw, I shouldn't mix pleasure with carpentry.
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15 Oct 2005, 01:13
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#25
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Luminous Flux
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: Fargo, ND
Posts: 215
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Mine will probably be running over a pedestrian on purpose. It's tempting, I don't know why.
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Cuddley_Battleship
Your neg rep destination.
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15 Oct 2005, 03:26
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#26
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Miles Teg
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Dom City
Posts: 5,192
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
I won't get any accidents that I cause, if I get an accident it will be their fault. However it might be because they do not see that I am speeding and take the risk....
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Audentes Fortuna Iuvat
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15 Oct 2005, 11:03
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#27
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PA Team
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 7,449
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Well, I think just generally hitting something without using mirrors properly.
My accidents so far have included:
getting rear ended at a junction when I stalled when I was a learner
pulling off my front bumper when coming out of my garage (the day after passing my test)
my dad reversing into my car because he forgot I was back from uni.
But, I've almost hit people several times, generally by not thinking* / looking at my mirrors enough
*almost emergency stopping on the M1 because the lane you want to pull into is full and you can't see how to get into it
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r8-10 RaH r10.5-12 MISTU
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15 Oct 2005, 13:14
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#28
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Tilting at windmills
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 579
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
I had a fellow steal my car, drive it about for three days, get involved in a police pursuit, then crash it head on into an oncoming vehicle at 70 kmph.
Just last week in fact.
Does that qualify as an accident by proxy?
If so, the benefits are a large insurance payout and no loss of my claims bonus (win).
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15 Oct 2005, 13:26
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#29
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Quote:
Originally Posted by dda
Then your next accident would probably be being run over while lying drunk in the gutter (or am I thinking of JBG?).
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We are all in the gutter, but some* of us are looking at the stars.
*Not Jonny. Jonny is furiously wanking himself off with one hand, drinking from a can of Guinness in the other, whilst calling random passers-by "Pieces a' shite."
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15 Oct 2005, 13:52
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#30
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Banned
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Further to the right
Posts: 19,441
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Excuse me I have more dignity than to be found drinking Guinness from a can.
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Some might ask what good is life without purpose but I'm anticipating a good lunch.
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15 Oct 2005, 14:14
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#31
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Lonely analytic
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 2,390
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Quote:
Originally Posted by KoeN
my next car accident will be caused by a woman.
or a muslim.
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What's with you and muslims nowadays.
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For real
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15 Oct 2005, 16:06
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#32
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Registered Awesome Person
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 5,676
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
I'll be hit by a car at night on St Marys Street in Cardiff. The bag of chips I was carrying will hopefully be smeared over the car, but no guarantees
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Finally free!
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15 Oct 2005, 19:42
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#33
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Street Tramp
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: Street Gutter
Posts: 341
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Last time I crashed (and only time so far!) it was into a policeman.
I think I need to outdo myself and go for an ambulance next time.
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Chimney Pots.
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15 Oct 2005, 19:55
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#34
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The Twilight of the Gods
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 23,481
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Re: Your Next Car Accident
Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
Excuse me I have more dignity than to be found drinking Guinness from a can.
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You drink it straight from the cask.
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