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Unread 20 Jun 2004, 23:08   #1
Kurashima
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Crap Irish Joke

Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn't have a lot of
Money between them, they could only raise the staggering sum of 50
pence.
Murphy said "Hang on, I have an idea." He went next door to the
butcher's shop and came out with one large sausage.
Shamus said "Are you crazy? Now we don't have any money left at
all".


Murphy replied "Don't worry - just follow me." He went into the
pub where he immediately ordered two pints of Guinness and two glasses
of Jamieson whiskey.Shamus said "Now you've lost it. Do you know how much trouble we will be in? We haven't got any money!!". Murphy replied, with a smile "Don't worry, I have a plan. Cheers!"


They downed their drinks. Murphy said "OK, I'll stick the sausage
through my zipper and you go on your knees and put it in your mouth."
Said and done, the barman noticed them, went berserk and threw them out.
They continued this, pub after pub, getting more and more drunk
all for free.

At the tenth pub Shamus said "Murphy - I don't think I can do any
more o'this. I'm pissed and me knees are killin' me!"
Murphy said "How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage in the
third pub."
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Unread 20 Jun 2004, 23:14   #2
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Re: Crap Irish Joke

and the horrid blue colour was necessary ?
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Unread 20 Jun 2004, 23:16   #3
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Re: Crap Irish Joke

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kurashima
Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn't have a lot of
Money between them, they could only raise the staggering sum of 50
pence. Murphy said "Hang on, I have an idea." He went next door to the
butcher's shop and came out with one large sausage.
Shamus said "Are you crazy? Now we don't have any money left at
all".

Murphy replied "Don't worry - just follow me." He went into the
pub where he immediately ordered two pints of Guinness and two glasses
of Jamieson whiskey.Shamus said "Now you've lost it. Do you know how much trouble we will be in? We haven't got any money!!". Murphy replied, with a smile "Don't worry, I have a plan. Cheers!"

They downed their drinks. Murphy said "OK, I'll stick the sausage
through my zipper and you go on your knees and put it in your mouth."
Said and done, the barman noticed them, went berserk and threw them out.
They continued this, pub after pub, getting more and more drunk
all for free.

At the tenth pub Shamus said "Murphy - I don't think I can do any
more o'this. I'm pissed and me knees are killin' me!"
Murphy said "How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage in the
third pub."
Removing the shit colour so I can read the damn thing.
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Unread 20 Jun 2004, 23:23   #4
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Re: Crap Irish Joke

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stew
Removing the shit colour so I can read the damn thing.
Now blaming you for letting me read a crap joke
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Unread 21 Jun 2004, 11:23   #5
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Re: Crap Irish Joke

i think the correct subject should have been Crap Kurashima Joke
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Unread 21 Jun 2004, 11:28   #6
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Re: Crap Irish Joke

i smiled
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Unread 21 Jun 2004, 11:44   #7
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Re: Crap Irish Joke

Oh begorra, wasn't that a fine 'ol joke. *does a jig*

The joke would have worked just as well without any mention of Irish ppl you ****ing bigot.
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Unread 21 Jun 2004, 18:25   #8
Kurashima
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Re: Crap Irish Joke

Quote:
Originally Posted by IncubusGod
Oh begorra, wasn't that a fine 'ol joke. *does a jig*

The joke would have worked just as well without any mention of Irish ppl you ****ing bigot.
Congratulations on completely misinterpreting the term "Bigot". The wording this technically falls under is "Xenophobia" or "Racism" as the joke targets a specific race or nation. Bigotry is described as follows.


bigotry

\Big"ot*ry\, n. [Cf. F. bigoterie.] 1. The state of mind of a bigot; obstinate and unreasoning attachment of one's own belief and opinions, with narrow-minded intolerance of beliefs opposed to them.



I have no specific beliefs which are "Anti Irish" nor "Anti Anything" to be perfectly honest. If you think a Bigot is someone who makes Irish jokes , i strongly recommend you walk into any pub in Govan wearing a Celtic football top and tell everyone how wonderful your team is. At that point, you can experience Bigotry first hand.

Or perhaps youd like to take your 4yr old child to a catholic primary school in Northern Ireland, and walk through an area which is predominantly Protestant, whilst being spat on in the name of "Religion".

Next time you label someone a "Bigot" , try and understand theres a stigma attached to that wording which some people, ESPECIALLY those from the West of Scotland and Northern Ireland , take very ****ing seriously.

Back up your claims or shut the **** up. Bigotry is not an insult to throw lightly.
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Unread 21 Jun 2004, 18:28   #9
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Re: Crap Irish Joke

Shut up kura you faggot.
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Unread 21 Jun 2004, 18:35   #10
Kurashima
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Re: Crap Irish Joke

Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
Shut up kura you faggot.
Jonny sucks cocks for guinness!
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Unread 22 Jun 2004, 17:47   #11
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Re: Crap Irish Joke

Is jonny irish?
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Unread 22 Jun 2004, 17:49   #12
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Re: Crap Irish Joke

not bad
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Unread 22 Jun 2004, 18:23   #13
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Re: Crap Irish Joke

Quote:
Originally Posted by Baron Morte
Is jonny irish?
No I'm actually from Krygyzstan. Like many less well known nations we are not extremely well-off and our serious vowel shortage led to the name of our country being barely pronounceable at the best of times.

If you have some spare vowels please send them to me. We have many aid-workers over here who are trying to bring back the vowels to our native land but they earnestly need your help if they are to succeed. Please ring our donation line 888 - 155 - VWLPLZ if you have any vowels left over at the end of your day.



PS In my country Countdown is the great satan instead of the US. Their wanton excessive usage of vowels without consideration of those who are less fortunate than us disgust both me and my brethren.
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Unread 23 Jun 2004, 10:13   #14
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Re: Crap Irish Joke

Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
No I'm actually from Krygyzstan. Like many less well known nations we are not extremely well-off and our serious vowel shortage led to the name of our country being barely pronounceable at the best of times.

If you have some spare vowels please send them to me. We have many aid-workers over here who are trying to bring back the vowels to our native land but they earnestly need your help if they are to succeed. Please ring our donation line 888 - 155 - VWLPLZ if you have any vowels left over at the end of your day.



PS In my country Countdown is the great satan instead of the US. Their wanton excessive usage of vowels without consideration of those who are less fortunate than us disgust both me and my brethren.
You are a TRATOR to the motherland, the great nation of Krygyzstan has never needed imperialst pig-dog vowels before and we shall crush their pitiful civilzations and afternoon word jumble shows without them. Ever since our foundation by the all knowing Stan we have never needed or required the intervention of the corrupt west, using vowels as if they were free condoms being handed out at a white snake aftershow party.
Prepare to be boiled alive in unrendered hog fat you pitiful turncoat, you shall be forcefed consonants and viciously murdered until deemed rehabilitated and suitable to re-enter society.

ALL HAIL STAN!
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Unread 23 Jun 2004, 17:54   #15
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Re: Crap Irish Joke

Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
No I'm actually from Krygyzstan. Like many less well known nations we are not extremely well-off and our serious vowel shortage led to the name of our country being barely pronounceable at the best of times.

If you have some spare vowels please send them to me. We have many aid-workers over here who are trying to bring back the vowels to our native land but they earnestly need your help if they are to succeed. Please ring our donation line 888 - 155 - VWLPLZ if you have any vowels left over at the end of your day.



PS In my country Countdown is the great satan instead of the US. Their wanton excessive usage of vowels without consideration of those who are less fortunate than us disgust both me and my brethren.
You could just say "OFC you ****ing goon"
It would work the same way
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