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4 Aug 2003, 10:04
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#1
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fascinated by bridges!
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Norwegiensis
Posts: 919
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Are you afraid?
This is perhaps a tad late, but ever since I saw Bowling for Columbine, a long time ago actually, I've been thinking more and more about fear.
Fear or concern makes us cautious, but caution can only be taken so far before it becomes paranoia. So when are we cautious, and when are we paranoid?
Some time ago my cousin married an American woman, from Texas. I've met her, nice enough girl. Point is, she was very concerned about safety. They have a kid together, and there's probably going to be more where that came from. So she got very concerned about the kids' safety - something which is normal, I mean who wouldn't be concerned about their kids' safety?
Yet I truly felt that she took her 'safety precautions' way further than any Norwegian mother I've ever met has done. There was this whole 'safety mentality' which I've never encountered before.
At that time I didn't think much about it, but after I'd seen Bowling..., and been given a view into what the film maker felt was the cause of all the handgun deaths in the US, which was fear, I started thinking about her safety mentality and how it would affect her and her children's life.
And suddenly I started to find the idea of fear very interesting. Now I belive it controls our actions in a much lager degree than I've thought before - actually I hardly thought of it before.
But enough about me, how big a part in our lives do you think that fear plays?
Matrim
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Holy smoke.
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4 Aug 2003, 10:20
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#2
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Angry Young Man
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Mister Cacciatore's down on Sullivan Street
Posts: 7,518
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W will probably say none.
And the less, the better i guess.
Personally, a lot though. Different sorts. Subliminal fears
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Believe in me, cause i don't believe in anything
And i wanna be someone, to believe, to believe in
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4 Aug 2003, 10:32
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#3
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Rawr rawr
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Upside down
Posts: 5,300
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Paranoia is where fear begins to affect your everday way of thinking and living. When you feel the need to buy "Survival pack 2000®" every time someone issues a terrorist warning.
Personally, I'm more affraid of the holiday pictures being shown to my parents than a terrorist attack or even me being in a traffic accident.
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4 Aug 2003, 11:07
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#4
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King of The Fat Boys
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: UK
Posts: 3,331
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A study of fear was done in the UK recently. It showed that there is not a strong correlation between fear of crime and actual crime. There were areas (Yorkshire I think) where people felt very little fear of crime compared to the national average, yet they are 25% more likely to suffer from crime than the national average.
There are also many areas (in the South East mainly) where people are very scared of crime yet are less likely to be affected by it.
This isn't unique to the UK either. As Michael Moore said in California incidents of crime on the TV have risen by 600% over the last 10 years, though crime has actually fallen by 3%. That might be a misquote, but you get the general idea. Basically it shows that Americans are becoming increasingly obsessed with crime, yet should have less reason to be.
Fear and reality are not correlated, which is just weird. Frankly it scares me (see what I did there?).
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4 Aug 2003, 11:08
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#5
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Guest
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Just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean there not after me
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4 Aug 2003, 14:21
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#6
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IRC Lackey
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Somewhere in the dark and nasty regions...
Posts: 1,471
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hrm
from a very early age, my mum told me not to do this or that because it could kill/seriously harm/damage me. Now as i realise she was just being careful, i also realise that this has affected me deeply because now i am not a risk taker at all - if something's risky, i'm incredibly unlikely to do it. I'm also rather safety/hygiene conscious because i've been brought up to be like that. Sometimes i wish i hadn't been, but then again maybe it's not so bad...
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-Mushroom.
"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it."
George Bernard Shaw
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4 Aug 2003, 14:40
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#7
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SHW
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: @home
Posts: 228
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Re: hrm
Quote:
Originally posted by Mushroom
from a very early age, my mum told me not to do this or that because it could kill/seriously harm/damage me. Now as i realise she was just being careful, i also realise that this has affected me deeply because now i am not a risk taker at all - if something's risky, i'm incredibly unlikely to do it. I'm also rather safety/hygiene conscious because i've been brought up to be like that. Sometimes i wish i hadn't been, but then again maybe it's not so bad...
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I had a lot of freedom when I was little. I did a lot of things that looking back, wasn't to clever.. But I survived, and I grew up to have little or no irrational fear.. until I got a daughter.. Now I have something to be afraid for.. but I have to not let it inhibit her natural progression.
But it is damn hard.. you just love those little buggers so increadibly much and don't want anything to happen to them..
There's this funny song in norway where an old man is talking to his grandson about all he did when he was little.. No bisycle helmets etc.. and he says it is a miracle he grew up at all..
Now we have EU regulations on what sand to use in kindergardens etc, but kids still get hurt, and some even die.. It is horrible but it happens, and I am not sure that all the precautions, and all kinds of rules and regulations can stop it..
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Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.
SHW, ReBorn, Wolfpack, NoS, Eclipse, Ascendancy
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4 Aug 2003, 17:52
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#8
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Dirte
Join Date: Apr 2002
Posts: 5,573
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Im not afraid for myself. I sometimes think people/things are after me, when im going home a few hours after midnigt, all alone in the big, dark concrete jungle. But im not afraid, im just more alert.
Im not afraid beacause i've realised that, no matter what safety precautions we take, we can die anytime, or get paralyzed, or get vegetablized. I mean, a drunken driver, a junkie whit a knife, a loose stone, a badly constucted house. So i just enjoy life to the fullest every day (or try at least), knowing that if i died tommorrow, i would look back and be happy.
Im more afraid for others. I mean, like my mother. Im scared ****less somebody is going to abuse her, rape her, or just break her heart. Or that somebody would kill my best mate. Or that my brother fell down a staricase and broke his neck. That's a greater fear for me then the fact that i could die.
I don't think i'l have kids, as i know too much about children/teenagers, and the dangers/risks. I would sit home every day chewing nails, and that's not something i want to!
But, im not a fool. I don't take risks for the fun of it (or at least not much). I don't want to die, i don't welcome pain.
__________________
"Freedom, morality, and the human dignity of the individual consists precisely in this; that he makes waffles not because he is forced to do so, but because he freely conceives it, wants it, and loves it."
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4 Aug 2003, 18:32
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#9
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fascinated by bridges!
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Norwegiensis
Posts: 919
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Very very nice.
Perhaps someone should organize a national movement against fear.
I think this is a serious problem actually. Fear isn't all that far away from angst, and every other day you hear about people doing three glasses of prozac every day to keep the angst at bay.
I like to think that I lead a rather fearless existance, though not foolhardy of course. I don't feel that it's likely that anyone will break into our house, so the door is unlocked all day long except at night.
But then again I have very few experiences that have sort of 'put fear into my brain' such as the article suggests happens. Remember someone stole my bike when I was 11 or something, but that's it.
Along with Deffeh I await some kind of response from W. This should be easy pray for him.
Matrim
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Holy smoke.
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4 Aug 2003, 18:37
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#10
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IRC Lackey
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Somewhere in the dark and nasty regions...
Posts: 1,471
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Re: Re: hrm
Quote:
Originally posted by -CP-
Now we have EU regulations on what sand to use in kindergardens etc, but kids still get hurt, and some even die.. It is horrible but it happens, and I am not sure that all the precautions, and all kinds of rules and regulations can stop it..
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Hmm. When i was really quite young, my mum told me that plastic bags could kill me. I had a stupid fear that plastic bags were going to jump on me and suffocate me until i was about 12...
No wonder i'm near paranoid about everything now i think about it
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-Mushroom.
"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it."
George Bernard Shaw
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4 Aug 2003, 18:39
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#11
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fascinated by bridges!
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Norwegiensis
Posts: 919
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Re: Re: Re: hrm
Quote:
Originally posted by Mushroom
Hmm. When i was really quite young, my mum told me that plastic bags could kill me. I had a stupid fear that plastic bags were going to jump on me and suffocate me until i was about 12...
No wonder i'm near paranoid about everything now i think about it
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Heh, I'm still worried about putting one of them on top of my head come to think of it.
Matrim
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Holy smoke.
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4 Aug 2003, 18:57
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#12
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: The Restaurant at the end of the Universe
Posts: 558
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I must have been twelve when I first started playing with matches and lighters and stuff.
Funny, the way in which we are programmed to (instinctively) avoid injury.
It sometimes makes me wonder in what other ways I'm coded to perform.
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4 Aug 2003, 19:02
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#13
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Gubbish
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: #FoW
Posts: 2,323
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Define fear.
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Gubble gubble gubble gubble
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4 Aug 2003, 19:17
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#14
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fascinated by bridges!
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Norwegiensis
Posts: 919
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Quote:
Originally posted by W
Define fear.
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Thanks.
Matrim
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Holy smoke.
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4 Aug 2003, 19:23
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#15
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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I think most fear can be conquered by rationality to an extent (and other methods but with reason as it's source).
We are burdened by our parents quite a bit - I remember my mother telling me never to eat Opal Fruits from the ground (even when they were rapped) because "Evil people could have bought them and injected them with drugs!" which strikes me as mildly ridiculous.
The most important fears would seem to be of other people. It certainly seems to fuel ethnic conflicts, social breakdown, etc. In pretty much every ethnic conflict the main actors will _always_ be motivated by fear. e.g. the Israeli's have to strike at the Arabs as hard as they can because do you want the Jews to be wiped off the earth? or If we don't expel the Croats from our town who knows what will happen to our Serb women, etc.
Modern urban fear I always will equate with increased inequality (among other things). An interesting survey I will always remember was reprinted in the BMA Journal once (apologies for length of quote):
Quote:
“The survey asked respondents in each state whether ‘Most people can be trusted – or would most try to take advantage of you if they get the chance?’ The percentage of citizens who thought that people try to take advantage (suggesting low levels of civic trust) was highly correlated with the degree of income inequality in each state…Similarly, density of associational life, as gauged by per capita membership of groups (church groups, sports groups, fraternal organisations, labour unions, and so on) was correlated with income inequality.”
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4 Aug 2003, 19:28
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#16
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Why is * censored?
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Liverpool
Posts: 95
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Quote:
Originally posted by Snurx
So i just enjoy life to the fullest every day (or try at least), knowing that if i died tommorrow, i would look back and be happy.
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Does that include the time spent on this forum?
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_________________
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4 Aug 2003, 19:41
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#17
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etc.
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Taken.
Posts: 1,602
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For months I thought it was normal for a 10 year old to wet the bed.
I AM NOT AFRAID ANYMORE!
*horse 'ney' in the background*
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10/20/04 <Dinoman> babies are like a online game... u wery soon get lack of sleep... and u try give em diffrent skills... it allso kills ur social life
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4 Aug 2003, 20:02
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#18
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Dirte
Join Date: Apr 2002
Posts: 5,573
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Quote:
Originally posted by Gario
Does that include the time spent on this forum?
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Yes, actually, it does.
I'm spending less and less time here, but that's beacause i have much to do these days. But, when i have time to kill, i would much rather be here chatting whit people then be downstairs, watching some stupid program on the telly.
Besides, i usually do lots of other stuff while posting here. Just sitting on the forums would be rather boring, don't you think?
__________________
"Freedom, morality, and the human dignity of the individual consists precisely in this; that he makes waffles not because he is forced to do so, but because he freely conceives it, wants it, and loves it."
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4 Aug 2003, 21:53
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#19
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Ball
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 4,410
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dante Hicks
We are burdened by our parents quite a bit - I remember my mother telling me never to eat Opal Fruits from the ground (even when they were rapped) because "Evil people could have bought them and injected them with drugs!" which strikes me as mildly ridiculous.
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Ok, so now you're older you're free to eat every sweet you see lying on the streets of London?
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4 Aug 2003, 21:57
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#20
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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Quote:
Originally posted by queball
Ok, so now you're older you're free to eat every sweet you see lying on the streets of London?
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Sweets in their wrappers, yes. Although ocassionally, I can save up to buy my own.
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