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Unread 25 Oct 2007, 20:55   #1
demiGOD
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Man's Benefits of Getting Married
1. The bitch takes ownership of 50% of all your assets
2. Less sex
3. Can't f*ck around anymore.
4. The bitch moves in, uses all utilities, water, electric, etc., and not pay any utility bills come end of the month.
5. All your clothes, socks, pants, etc. get rehung and refolded because she didn't like the way you folded them.
6. You're forced to like her family members.
7. You get into cool arguments like "why is the toilet seat up?", "what are you thinking right now?", "why don't you remember where our first date was? I thought you love me!!!", "can you stop f*cking snoring at night? It's f*cking annoying.." and "so which one is the short stop?"
8. Going to a friend's house for poker is like begging for snow in Los Angeles.
9. The bitch starts gaining weight.
10. Alimony
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Unread 25 Oct 2007, 21:06   #2
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Re: Man's Benefits of Getting Married
Where's the punchline?
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The outraged poets threw sticks and rocks over the side of the bridge. They were all missing Mary and he felt a contented smug feeling wash over him. He would have given them a coy little wave if the roof hadn't collapsed just then. Mary then found himself in the middle of an understandably shocked family's kitchen table. So he gave them the coy little wave and realized it probably would have been more effective if he hadn't been lying on their turkey.
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Unread 25 Oct 2007, 21:13   #3
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Re: Man's Benefits of Getting Married
he is the punchline.
Seriously, you want respect from a partner? - try not referring to them as "bitch" all the time.
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Unread 25 Oct 2007, 22:03   #4
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Re: Man's Benefits of Getting Married
He is just calling a spade a spade, be nice to him
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Unread 25 Oct 2007, 22:28   #5
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Re: Man's Benefits of Getting Married
I look at the first post in this thread, then i summ up my last 6 months as a married man..


Then I cry.
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Unread 26 Oct 2007, 14:56   #6
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Re: Man's Benefits of Getting Married
i am pretty sure that married men live longer, if that is any compensation for the decades of nagging or simply more punishment i am not sure.
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Unread 26 Oct 2007, 15:19   #7
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Re: Man's Benefits of Getting Married
Thus marriage lengthens life. Oh, joyous are the wonders of the abuse of statistics.
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The outraged poets threw sticks and rocks over the side of the bridge. They were all missing Mary and he felt a contented smug feeling wash over him. He would have given them a coy little wave if the roof hadn't collapsed just then. Mary then found himself in the middle of an understandably shocked family's kitchen table. So he gave them the coy little wave and realized it probably would have been more effective if he hadn't been lying on their turkey.
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Unread 26 Oct 2007, 16:06   #8
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Re: Man's Benefits of Getting Married
Quote:
Originally Posted by Phil^
he is the punchline.
Seriously, you want respect from a partner? - try not referring to them as "bitch" all the time.
Don't worry Aryn still loves you.
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Unread 26 Oct 2007, 16:38   #9
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Exclamation Re: Man's Benefits of Getting Married
Well don't get married then you ****ing mongchop.

News just in: now that we don't live in the Middle Ages, there's actually very little point to marriage at all.
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Unread 26 Oct 2007, 16:50   #10
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Re: Man's Benefits of Getting Married
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hebdomad
Don't worry Aryn still loves you.
she probably does...

but you may have missed the memo...
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