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Unread 16 Jun 2005, 10:44   #51
Appocomaster
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

you could pull the rip cord and then sploot*

*obviously I meant the other meaning
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Unread 16 Jun 2005, 10:47   #52
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Appocomaster
you could pull the rip cord and then sploot*

*obviously I meant the other meaning
I suggest sploot then the rip cord, unless you are jumping tandem
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Unread 16 Jun 2005, 11:03   #53
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Then you'll probably have to start on the plane
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Unread 16 Jun 2005, 12:40   #54
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Actually, there are numerous cases of monoganous animals.Swans, a certain breed of voles, certain mice and a breed of seagull. Why I hear you ask? There are many benefits, mainly to do with rearing young- while the mother is giving birth/nursing young, the father is out getting food. So it means the young are never left unattended and if the forager dies, there is a still a parent around to take care of the young. This much has already been covered by Radical Edward, so why do they stay together? Because generally, if this pairing is succesful enough, the mother realises she has found a good mate and vice versa.


And the other hand, you have lions, with one male getting all the girls, after having proven himself to be the fittest and most pwerful male. Then you have black widow spiders- the female eats the male after sex.


Apparently all of these are succesful strategies, but I kinda have a soft spot for those monogamous animals... :-P
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Unread 16 Jun 2005, 12:43   #55
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Exclamation Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Who wants to be a vole?
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Unread 16 Jun 2005, 13:10   #56
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

I had to look up what a "vole"* was, I was very dissapointed to learn that it was just some kind of mouse


*when searching for Vole on google the first thing I found was this:

A virgin female prairie vole sniffs a male's genital area. ...

Perhaps it's not THAT bad beeing a vole
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Unread 16 Jun 2005, 14:40   #57
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

The problem is that humans need to be at war. And, alone in a relationship with one other person, you have the options of being in a cold or hot war. Hot war leads to lots of arguments and fighting and such, but great sex. But most people in such a relationship opt for cold war, because from somewhere they get the impression that they aren't supposed to be at war at all. And so life goes stale, and each subconsciously undermines the other's happiness. Terrible sex.

The cure for this for most couples is to have kids. Then you both have an enemy besides each other, and form a natural alliance. Being able to have sex between dealing with all that kid's shit suddenly becomes a victory and an accomplishment. It may not be 'fireworks sex', but it's sure a hell of a lot better than cold war "I guess we should be having sex" sex.

Now, a lot of people don't want to have kids simply to have someone to be at war against, but a pet that you both hate will probably do the trick as well.
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Unread 16 Jun 2005, 16:36   #58
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Thermodynamics
Apparently all of these are succesful strategies, but I kinda have a soft spot for those monogamous animals... :-P
I bet you do, you dirty boy
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Unread 16 Jun 2005, 16:47   #59
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Exclamation Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

You know Tom, posting on GD is a lot like making love to a beautiful woman.
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Unread 16 Jun 2005, 16:48   #60
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tomkat
I bet you do, you dirty boy
Don't flatter yourself TomKat- you're not monogamous.
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Unread 16 Jun 2005, 16:50   #61
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
You know Tom, posting on GD is a lot like making love to a beautiful woman.
Yeah- its all down to pressing the right buttons.
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Unread 16 Jun 2005, 16:50   #62
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Exclamation Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

He's homogamous.
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Unread 18 Jun 2005, 08:58   #63
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Chika
Situation: I was with my wife for about 3 and a half years before we got married. During those 3 years sex was great. Multiple postions, outdoors, indoors, in the kitchen, in the bathroom, you name it. Our 1st aniversary is tomorrow. I started thinking about our marriage (sex life mainly) and how we had changed since being married. Atm, on any given day, we just have sex in only one postion, MAYBE 2, and it takes much longer, and its always on the living room couch. My wife has the same body as before, I am attracted to her even more I suppose, but it seems that I feel akward for some reason. Is this normal!!!!!????!11! because its driving me crazy.
Go out on a boat trip. The Japanese harbor is very pretty this time of the year (or is it hurricane season out there?). Or go out camping for the weekend. Para-sail, snorkel, etc. Outdoor trips like these will get you out of that strange routine that we get stuck on when on a long-term relationship.

Or. I hate to advice it, but maybe it's time to have a kid?
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Unread 18 Jun 2005, 11:04   #64
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

you're encouraging chika to... reproduce?
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Unread 18 Jun 2005, 11:44   #65
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by demiGOD
I hate to advice it, but maybe it's time to have a kid?
Because he's got a dull sex-life? A kid'll fix that!

"Oh God the crying of our little shit of a child and the smell of baby vomit is really turning me on darling. Maybe it's the valium, or maybe it's not having slept for four months but dammit honey I want you to do me"

Edit: Though the lactation might allow you to more fully explore an adult baby fetish.
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Unread 18 Jun 2005, 11:52   #66
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

War on an new front?


May I suggest you just unite against those animals you are cursed with living beside?


*your neighbours
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Unread 18 Jun 2005, 18:09   #67
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by pablissimo
Because he's got a dull sex-life? A kid'll fix that!
This is a stage of their marriage where they (he) realize that there are (should) be more to their relationship than sex. That's why I suggested for them to go on a trip somewhere or have a child because everyday routines can dull couple's sex life.

Cheating on her can cure this too.
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Unread 18 Jun 2005, 18:31   #68
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Start asphyxiating her. That's kind of kinky. Or have her asphyxiate you! Or both do it! That one mightn't work out that well.
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Unread 19 Jun 2005, 13:00   #69
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by pablissimo
Start asphyxiating her. That's kind of kinky. Or have her asphyxiate you! Or both do it! That one mightn't work out that well.
I saw that in a movie once, I wanked.
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Unread 20 Jun 2005, 07:30   #70
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by pablissimo
Start asphyxiating her.
quick note: remember to stop before she goes all purple and stuff.
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Unread 20 Jun 2005, 13:52   #71
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by demiGOD
This is a stage of their marriage where they (he) realize that there are (should) be more to their relationship than sex. That's why I suggested for them to go on a trip somewhere or have a child because everyday routines can dull couple's sex life.

Cheating on her can cure this too.

We have a kid. Before the kid great after the kid, not so great. Things are actually looking up since out aniversary though. We dropped the little one off at his grandma's house. Actually, I think the problem was that we never really are alone.
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Unread 20 Jun 2005, 16:01   #72
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Question Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Radical Edward
quick note: remember to stop before she goes all purple and stuff.
Why?
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Unread 20 Jun 2005, 16:03   #73
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
Why?
Cement prices are on the up
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Unread 21 Jun 2005, 09:08   #74
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
Why?
because otherwise bubba will be keeping him too busy to have time to post here.

actually, I see your point.
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Unread 21 Jun 2005, 09:10   #75
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by SepH
I had to look up what a "vole"* was, I was very dissapointed to learn that it was just some kind of mouse


*when searching for Vole on google the first thing I found was this:

A virgin female prairie vole sniffs a male's genital area. ...

Perhaps it's not THAT bad beeing a vole
typical internet. you look for something like a vole and the first thing you come across is genitals.
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Unread 21 Jun 2005, 10:18   #76
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by acropolis
stuff.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rammstein
"Sex ist eine Schlacht - Liebe ist Krieg"
Anyways, it's an old way of speech and it's good one. I've been having a steady relationship for a little less than two years now (that's a lot me being a teenie), and for a person like me things get easily very boring. You need inspirations and something new with the sex. It's not likely that a shag on the couch will keep you interested in more than two weeks, as once it becomes a pattern it'll degenerate into dullness (insert a lot of kissing/fondling, insert undressing, insert penis, move it around a bit, pick it out, clean the mess, go eat dinner).

Buy handcuffs. Toys, sexy outfits, whatever.

Try the dark side.
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Unread 21 Jun 2005, 11:51   #77
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

so
you have only been having sex with her on the sofa while watching 24 for a while now
and its starting to get a bit samey and while contemplating this you start wondering what is wrong/what deeper problem it could be a signal of/if you should shag your new secretary with the great tits/etc

how about ..

you seduce your wife while she is cooking your dinner this evening?
tell her that she looks beautiful and how much you appreciate her looking after you so well
and then do rude stuff together with the courgettes?

if you want some spark back
perhaps you could spark things up a bit?




(btw if you are bored now then she was bored 18 months ago)
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Unread 21 Jun 2005, 11:54   #78
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Oh look, madi's back.

To put some spark back into our lives \o/
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Unread 21 Jun 2005, 15:29   #79
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by madi

you seduce your wife while she is cooking your dinner this evening?
tell her that she looks beautiful and how much you appreciate her looking after you so well
and then do rude stuff together with the courgettes?
they call them zucchini

you can't do rude things with something that sounds like a japanese children's toy.

its just not proper.
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Unread 21 Jun 2005, 15:52   #80
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Yahwe
they call them zucchini

you can't do rude things with something that sounds like a japanese children's toy.

its just not proper.
Google zucchini (or click here) and look at the third picture. Wierd.
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Unread 21 Jun 2005, 16:29   #81
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Exclamation Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Now thinking about Madi and courgettes yo
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Unread 23 Jun 2005, 02:12   #82
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

why madi ?
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Unread 23 Jun 2005, 04:39   #83
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Yahwe
they call them zucchini

you can't do rude things with something that sounds like a japanese children's toy.

its just not proper.
What about Hello Kitty stuff. It is a children's toy. It is made by Japaneese but yet it has such an erotic sound to it. Must I take it all back to the store?
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Unread 23 Jun 2005, 04:43   #84
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by dda
What about Hello Kitty stuff. It is a children's toy. It is made by Japaneese but yet it has such an erotic sound to it. Must I take it all back to the store?
i think the first question has to be

"why did you buy it?"
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Unread 23 Jun 2005, 05:06   #85
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Exclamation Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by NEWSBOT3
why madi ?
She mentioned them.

'Nature is a language, can't you read?'
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Unread 23 Jun 2005, 08:32   #86
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
She mentioned them.

'Nature is a language, can't you read?'
I may have been in a state on inebriation with an effect of such.
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Unread 23 Jun 2005, 16:35   #87
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
She mentioned them.

'Nature is a language, can't you read?'
just ask me i won't say no, how could i
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Unread 24 Jun 2005, 19:28   #88
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Chika

Marriages have highs, lows and plateaus. The trick is not to panic. The sex may change but that isn't necessarily a bad thing. Concentrate on the relationship. Concentrate on sex as a communication of feeling. Don't concentrate on yourself.

Btw, have you taken any of the advice given in this thread? Have you tried any of the suggestions? If so, who is her divorce attorney?
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Unread 24 Jun 2005, 20:36   #89
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Question Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Did anyone say **** her up the ass yet?
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Unread 24 Jun 2005, 20:55   #90
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

I'm surprised I managed to go to asphyxiation without having seen anal suggested, I guess I just assumed and ramped things up.

Shit. Now I look like a monster. An erotic monster, granted.
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Unread 24 Jun 2005, 22:08   #91
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by pablissimo
I'm surprised I managed to go to asphyxiation without having seen anal suggested, I guess I just assumed and ramped things up.

Shit. Now I look like a monster. An erotic monster, granted.
Oh. I thought you had suggested ass-fixiation. So thought it was already suggested.
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Unread 24 Jun 2005, 22:14   #92
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
Did anyone say **** her up the ass yet?
Maybe we assumed that since they were married they already did?
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Unread 24 Jun 2005, 22:57   #93
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by sniborp
Maybe we assumed that since they were married they already did?
someone check with rr on this.
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Unread 25 Jun 2005, 00:06   #94
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Exclamation Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by sniborp
Maybe we assumed that since they were married they already did?
Assumption is the mother of all ****-ups.
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Unread 25 Jun 2005, 00:11   #95
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furball has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.furball has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.furball has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.furball has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.furball has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.furball has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.furball has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.furball has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.furball has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.furball has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.furball has ascended to a higher existance and no longer needs rep points to prove the size of his e-penis.
Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
Assumption is the mother of all ****-ups.
no, you're wrong.


when you assume, you make an ass out of u and me.



see?
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Unread 25 Jun 2005, 00:13   #96
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Exclamation Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

I hope a pensioner shoves a knitting needle up your anus when you go to bed tonight.
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Unread 25 Jun 2005, 10:13   #97
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

We should use the word 'pierce' more in conversations like this.
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Unread 26 Jun 2005, 21:23   #98
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
Assumption is the mother of all ****-ups.
I thought it was presumption?






Oh never mind.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blink 182
Breathing deeply, walking backwards,
finding strength to call and ask her
Roller coaster favorite ride,
let me kiss you one last time.
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Unread 26 Jun 2005, 23:36   #99
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by pablissimo
We should use the word 'pierce' more in conversations like this.


On an almost completely unrelated note, its exactly a year since I gor my labret pierced.
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Unread 26 Jun 2005, 23:48   #100
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Re: Making love [thread mainly for people with wife or steady girlfriend]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Thermodynamics
On an almost completely unrelated note, its exactly a year since I gor my labret pierced.
I had to google for 'labret'

(Click here if you are uneducated at these things, like me )
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