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Unread 25 Jan 2007, 17:13   #51
Dante Hicks
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
unless ofcourse your friends' success stays stationary as yours increases.
Well, maybe it's because I'm an arrogant son of a bitch - but I would presume that I could outpace their success, if I cared enough. Not sure what I'm basing this on though.
Quote:
Originally Posted by horn
i don't know if you do pills pig but if you have and you've had a "comedown" before, exactly how easy was it for you to "snap out of it"?
I realise this wasn't directed at me, but it's not actually that hard, given enough practice. When you first experience them they can be a bit overwhelming but this soon passes. Mainly, you start spotting the symptoms and avoiding the behaviours/thought patterns which will make them worse. After the first fifteen times or so I'd say you can almost entirely avoid the worst of it (unless it happens to coincide with a lot of other negative stuff going on, in which case it can be slightly harder). You can take supplements for it too, but I can't be bothered with all that.

As I said in my blog recently, I spent 90% of my weeks last year recovering from E and I doubt I had one "real" comedown the whole year. The nightmares are harder to avoid admittedly, but it's all good!
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Unread 25 Jan 2007, 17:20   #52
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Experience with altered states of mind seems to improve your ability to handle them over time. I've heard this from many people for alcohol and various other narcotics and I know it's true for me personally with alcohol and when I was learning to dive on holidays I was told nitrogen narcosis is fairly similar.
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Unread 25 Jan 2007, 18:02   #53
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by horn
well personally....
i don't have any educational success which is what counts
i don't feel young
i don't enjoy being perpetually single
and freedom is a pretty misleading term :/
You are smart horn. I think you know that, I know that and others know that. I know a chap who got 5 As at A level, a first from LSE and you know what the guy finds it hard to string together a sentance and have a good debate whilst putting his views over.

You can converse. You have an opinion. It isn't from a text book. Just because you don't have a certificate doesn't mean you are not intelligent. Educational Sucess doens't count. I only realise that now that I have the educational sucess. A certificate is a piece of paper, it can be forged, burnt, lost and most importantly eaten.

What counts is whether you are intelligent, not what papers you have.

You are young sunshine. Get used to it. I finished university, I still feel and look young. I reckon by 30 it will start hitting me that I am moving to the next stage of my life (hopefully marriage, kids etc). Why a 19/20/21 year old will feel old is beyond me.

Freedom is a misleading term? Do you have a passport? Do you have any money? If so you can combine the two things and go see the world. Flight to China £400. A month spent in China, a further £400? max? Why not? See the world, meet new people, go to places where people dont judge you from the playground but judge you because of your skin colour and already you are superiour in China


Quote:
i agree. whereas you see that as motivation for getting off your arse and doing stuff like the independent black woman that you are. i feel like crying and sitting around on the internet.
I cry in films and sit around on the net, but thats not my life. Nor will it ever be so. You can work it out. Get in a routine of getting out and living it, not wasting your talent on the internet. Heck if you had confidence the stories you tell, the way you come over you could do what you want.


Quote:
I think it's more about the feeling that no one really cares as opposed to not being able to organise a party. i myself organised something for my 21st though!
I can understand being upset about that, but once again have you never forgot birthdays?

I don't know my parents/sisters birthdays. Nor my two best friends, that doesnt make me a bad friend, just means I have big priorities.
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Unread 25 Jan 2007, 19:05   #54
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Happy Birthday, Deffeh!
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Unread 25 Jan 2007, 19:59   #55
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Re: Drifting towards 21

I'm sure you can get together some money, it's never as hard as you think!
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Unread 25 Jan 2007, 20:01   #56
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by horn
hey hey hey.
this thread is about me now.
Aren't they all?
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 01:37   #57
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Still a year and 8 months left for me
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 02:20   #58
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by horn
well personally....
i don't have any educational success which is what counts
i don't feel young
i don't enjoy being perpetually single
and freedom is a pretty misleading term :/
Hey horn i sent you another Private Message.

It involves you leaving the gym and saying "HI!" to me.

I'm the honorary GD Social Secretary (true story guyz). It'll be fun. Let's do it. I have about 6 hours tomorrow with nothing to do. Help me fill my time by going for a drink with me! Hurrah!

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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 02:39   #59
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Re: Drifting towards 21

I just turned 27.

My grandmother hinted that I should find myself a woman soon. Then she asked if I wasnt getting worried about my lack of steady girlfriend, and I just replied "no, not really".
My father has been asking for grandchildren for a few years now, but Im not in a big rush.
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 09:09   #60
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Re: Drifting towards 21

It's ok, In Britain same sex partnerships are legal. You can also get married, plus you might be able to adopt soon, so don't worry about what your family think. Just do what feels right.
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 09:29   #61
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by pig
If I am unhappy I do something about it. I try and pick myself up and go and expose myself to real life. Life is never as bad as you make it. It's always bad at that moment, hell I thought I was going to explode the last week of writing my disseratation. I wanted to drop out of university. I wanted to **** the last 3 years because I was struggling with it.

But you know what, if I believed the crap that my head spouts out, I would of done so. But I did it. Yes it was hard. Yes I didnt get much sleep for about a week. Yes my diet consisted of Marlboro Lights and Coca Cola, however I got through it.

There's no point backing down, take on challenges. Don't get weak and stay strong.

Like I said earlier, no one actually truly gives a f*ck about you, other than yourself.

People said to me, but how Simon, how the hell do you pull? To which I tell them look if I don't back myself, no one else will. It is 100% true. If I don't believe I have the ability to meet young ladies, I certainly won't meet them. Why would anyone date me, when I wouldn't date me.
Sorry to just pick one "random" subject in this discussion, but I've always thought this one to be fairly interesting.
To me stuff like this always seems to be one of those "easier said than done" things, as I don't even have the slightest idea how to start about thinking like that. It always seemed to me that I'm too much limited by the social bounderies that exist around me. I mean I'm too dependant on things I have no control over, other people being the main part of that.
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 09:32   #62
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Re: Drifting towards 21

If only you all were Alpha Males like piglet and I
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 09:48   #63
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sharur
To me stuff like this always seems to be one of those "easier said than done" things, as I don't even have the slightest idea how to start about thinking like that.
From the little I've read on the topic, you can actually gain some benefits from simply positive visualising something, or even just saying something to yourself repeatedly even if at first you don't believe it.

On a vaguely related subject, the BBC have an article today : http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/3335275.stm on luck.

Quote:
I asked a group of volunteers to spend a month carrying out exercises designed to help them think and behave like a lucky person.

These exercises helped them spot chance opportunities, listen to their intuition, expect to be lucky, and be more resilient to bad luck.

One month later, the volunteers returned and described what had happened. The results were dramatic: 80% of people were now happier, more satisfied with their lives and, perhaps most important of all, luckier.
Of course, all this should be taken with a pinch of salt but I doubt there's much to be lost from trying some of these things.
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 10:21   #64
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by pig
You are young sunshine. Get used to it. I finished university, I still feel and look young. I reckon by 30 it will start hitting me that I am moving to the next stage of my life (hopefully marriage, kids etc). Why a 19/20/21 year old will feel old is beyond me.
In my case (maybe it's the same feeling for horn) it's not that I feel old in general, but I feel old in comparison with my accomplishments. Sure, I don't expect other ppl to accomplish things for me, but sometimes you have to make choices that aren't really choices. For example I'd have loved to study law or psychology, yet I didn't want to waste my parents money as I was pretty sure I wouldn't have succeeded in those studies.. so I went to study computer science which was a "sure bet". There's alot of other examples like this, some probably better, but I'm not really that eager to share them on a forum.

Quote:
Originally Posted by pig
Freedom is a misleading term? Do you have a passport? Do you have any money? If so you can combine the two things and go see the world. Flight to China £400. A month spent in China, a further £400? max? Why not? See the world, meet new people, go to places where people dont judge you from the playground but judge you because of your skin colour and already you are superiour in China
This is what I also talked about in my previous post. I'd love to travel like this, and I'm kinda planning to do it, but yet I sometimes have second toughts about it. For one, I'd be traveling alone and "one is the loneliest(sp?) number", right? Secondly, I have a job which makes it harder to really "experience" the freedom, knowing you have to come back at a certain date. Also, (and this may be a pretty stupid reason, so beware) what would my friends think about me when I travel alone? Would they be offended I didn't ask them with me? Would they think it's pathetic? Would they just find it weird? Would they understand at all? And finally, aren't there much better things to throw money against, since afterall money is what makes the world go round (which I also find pretty sad).
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 10:34   #65
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
From the little I've read on the topic, you can actually gain some benefits from simply positive visualising something, or even just saying something to yourself repeatedly even if at first you don't believe it.

On a vaguely related subject, the BBC have an article today : http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/3335275.stm on luck.


Of course, all this should be taken with a pinch of salt but I doubt there's much to be lost from trying some of these things.
Not wanting to be stubborn or anything, but I've done these things and taken them further, I've not only said it to myself repeatedly but to people I know. Now they think I'm an arrogant bastard that has a too high self-esteem, while it's just the opposite. Some people have the ability to lie to others and convince theirselves of their own lies. I fail at the latter.
Though I must say this post makes me looks more "emo" than I really am, it's a bit frightening really as I'm not at all an emo-person. Like I said, I'm an arrogant person with a too high self-esteem.
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 10:43   #66
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Re: Drifting towards 21

I got paid today some mula. It wasn't a vast amount but I know that if I wanted to I could gather it up and tommorrow be on a flight somewhere. I have done random tripsexscursions before. Two years ago I decided about 3 days before I went I would go backpacking around Europe. Last summer I decided the day after the end of my exams I would take my girlfriend to paris. In september I randomly went some friends to prague, just booked and went. I sometimes just go to see friends at the drop of a phone call. It's not difficult, it's about letting go.

Stop trying to please other people, and please yourself. It's not difficult, I do it all the time (I also do please other people). I have learnt to not let people walk over me, and to not give a damn about what people think. Sure I am still worried about my appearance and what people might say if I do certain things, but then again who isn't? But what I won't do is let those feelings decide what I do.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante
From the little I've read on the topic, you can actually gain some benefits from simply positive visualising something, or even just saying something to yourself repeatedly even if at first you don't believe it.

On a vaguely related subject, the BBC have an article today : http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/3335275.stm on luck.
I think there is definatly some truth behind that story.

A friend of mine always thinks "I'm getting ill". Those are common words coming out of his mouth. Sure enough a few days down the line after the headaches and coughs he is ill. Now I know I am not superman, but I rarely get ill. Part of that is down to the way I think. I am not scared of dirt, I am not a clean freak, I dont wince when someone coughs and I feel healthy. I basically tell myself im cant get ill. My friend does the opposite, he is constantly telling me that he is coming down with xyx or xzx. In actual fact I doubt he has much illness, it is just him thinking it.

Positive thinking works (I believe)

Quote:
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If only you all were Alpha Males like piglet and I
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 10:58   #67
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by pig
I believe that is true. I watched a program where ten people were supersticious and tried to think lucky, where as ten people broke the supersticions and thought unlucky. Ten lucky and Ten unlucky, bought 100 scratchcards each. The ten lucky people earned considerably a lot more than the ten unlucky. Sure it might be coincedence. I truly believe that you make your own luck and thinking positively is part of that.
This post makes me resent the fact you're alive.

Quote:
A friend of mine always thinks "I'm getting ill". Those are common words coming out of his mouth. Sure enough a few days down the line after the headaches and coughs he is ill. Now I know I am not superman, but I rarely get ill. Part of that is down to the way I think. I am not scared of dirt, I am not a clean freak, I dont wince when someone coughs and I feel healthy. I basically tell myself im cant get ill. My friend does the opposite, he is constantly telling me that he is coming down with xyx or xzx. In actual fact I doubt he has much illness, it is just him thinking it.
This is a little bit better.

Quote:
For ****s sake can we avoid having this smiley three times in the space of ten posts? What the **** happened to real wit? Sacrificed in order to gain more time to watch Big Brother in I suppose?
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 11:24   #68
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
This post makes me resent the fact you're alive.
It pains me too, it hurt, but it hurt more to delete it.

Quote:
This is a little bit better.
Some smiley would be appropriate at this point in time to show me being happy that you just said that, however I've read all your post...

Quote:
For ****s sake can we avoid having this smiley three times in the space of ten posts? What the **** happened to real wit? Sacrificed in order to gain more time to watch Big Brother in I suppose?
It's 5 times in 10, thanks to your witty post!

I was just responding to TK, we need a hifive emotion, maybe we have one..but it's shit. So the salute is still sticking your arm and hand up, except its just not slapping the hand and hifiving.

I don't watch Big Brother, I wish I did, I missed the whole is it racism vibe.
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 13:47   #69
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by pig
It pains me too, it hurt, but it hurt more to delete it.
For a moment I thought maybe you had deleted your inane comment but I scrolled up and there it was

Quote:
I was just responding to TK, we need a hifive emotion, maybe we have one..but it's shit. So the salute is still sticking your arm and hand up, except its just not slapping the hand and hifiving.
No, we don't and if you're that desperate use o/\o please.
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 13:52   #70
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
For a moment I thought maybe you had deleted your inane comment but I scrolled up and there it was


No, we don't and if you're that desperate use o/\o please.
I could delete it, maybe I will.

I will buy a pint at lunch and decide then. I'm going to have a nice pub lunch in a pub called the station. Cracking pub. So who knows come, 2pm it may be deleted!

Is that ok? o/\o
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 13:53   #71
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by pig
I could delete it, maybe I will.

I will buy a pint at lunch and decide then. I'm going to have a nice pub lunch in a pub called the station. Cracking pub. So who knows come, 2pm it may be deleted!

Is that ok? o/\o
I don't like you.
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 13:57   #72
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Ok Yahwe...
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 13:59   #73
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by pig
Ok Yahwe...
Don't worry, it's just because you're going to the pub before me, nothing intrinsic.
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Unread 26 Jan 2007, 15:37   #74
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
Don't worry, it's just because you're going to the pub before me, nothing intrinsic.
I had a well nice lunch.

It's weird in Birmingham everyone seems to be getting drunk on a Friday.

The pubs while are generally busy during the week get packed on Fridays and everyone has a drink and a meal. I had a well nice panini and a couple pints of carling.

Now I feel all humble, and might have a nap.
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Unread 27 Jan 2007, 01:22   #75
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by pig
I had a well nice lunch.
I don't like you.
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Unread 27 Jan 2007, 01:24   #76
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Well I like you, so you will just have to meet me halfway, or rather when sitting next to me, because of my size it will probably be a bit closer. But you know what I mean.
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Unread 27 Jan 2007, 01:26   #77
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Re: Drifting towards 21

it was i who stole your cigarettes fatty
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Unread 27 Jan 2007, 01:55   #78
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Re: Drifting towards 21

I know, but I won't hold it against you.
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Unread 27 Jan 2007, 03:17   #79
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Re: Drifting towards 21

[quote=All Systems Go]Seeing as everyone has a birthday, I'd put the number at about 100. Give or take 0.
considering a birthday as a day with one or more births, i would say that the number of given days in a year that will have births, out of 100, is around 60.


Quote:
that's an immediate issue which can be resolved straight away. If I then had to apologise to this person on the same day every year for the rest of their lives I probably wouldn't bother.

I'm in regular contact with my friends whose birthday I would know. the odds of everyone forgetting about it is quite slim so there's generally no problem. With people I don't see regularly or very often at all the need/desire to contect them on their birthday diminishes and to send a message may bring them some happiness but not getting into contact will not bring them unhappiness.
When the resolveness of a social construct´s imposition becomes a burden too large to withstand? Apologies and calling people on birthday is the same thing, the difference is, as you stated, that one is easier to accomplish than another.






Quote:
It depends on the situation. Not having sex with family members is not merely sociological in nature as having a child together increases of deformed children.
there is no right and wrong in matters of evolution, depending on the evolutionary cenario, its better to have inbred generations.

Source



Quote:
Who are you to say that if the son and the mother ran away together and had a relationship that they would not eventually throw of the socially instilled negative feelings and have a good time.
An idiot




Quote:
Neglecting the accuracy of this statement for a moment I would like to point out that we are not animals and can join forces to fight for social change.
Oh! Isnt this a goal for everyone to achieve some day?


Quote:

Justify this statement with one shred of evidence.
No!



Quote:
I resent the idea of the normalfamily as being particulaly unhealthy and needlessly superiorat best, and prejudiced and bigotted at worst.
I reserve the right to use statistics as a mean to comprehend normality



Quote:
So people are incapable of change and councelling is just a waste of time? thanks for clearing that up!
Thats a whole different thing from sitting on my computer screen and ranting about Birthdays in an internet forum


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Unread 27 Jan 2007, 05:08   #80
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by s|k
I turned 30 a week or so ago. Life gets better, but then I was pretty happy at 21. Being a Marine, getting drunk, running around, Hawai'i, Okinawa, beaches, girls, clubs. It was good. I dunno, maybe it's the UK weather.

Or the us president, i doubt 21 year old soilders are quite as happy today, btw why haven't you been recalled? i thought they kept you on reserve or somesuch for a period after discharge?
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Unread 27 Jan 2007, 11:54   #81
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by pig
I know
No you didn't. You were totally perplexed, I think you even blamed me for stealing your cancer sticks. The best bit was when you started borrowing other peoples' cigarettes just to control your cravings.
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Unread 28 Jan 2007, 02:27   #82
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Re: Drifting towards 21

From July those nasty smokers will have to smoke outside the restaurants and bars, and after a night out my clothes will smell as fresh as the day I bought them!
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Unread 28 Jan 2007, 02:33   #83
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Actually largely you find you reek of other people's body odour
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Unread 28 Jan 2007, 02:53   #84
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Re: Drifting towards 21

I didn't find that at all in Jersey when I was there. They implemented the law on January 1st.

Maybe my nose had packed up after all the gimlets I consumed.

I suppose the body odour thing is an issue in packed nightclubs and things - pubs/bars shouldn't smell that badly of BO though, surely?

Let's hijack this thread to discuss the smoking "ban"!
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Unread 28 Jan 2007, 03:01   #85
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Sorry, I just read "night out" there. Nightclubs and to a lesser extent bars and pubs, depending on what sort of place it is, largely smell like shit. After a good few beers it all sort of melts away though
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Unread 28 Jan 2007, 03:49   #86
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Re: Drifting towards 21

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tomkat
From July those nasty smokers will have to smoke outside the restaurants and bars, and after a night out my clothes will smell as fresh as the day I bought them!
ahhhhhhhhhh

I too remember 1976
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Unread 28 Jan 2007, 04:52   #87
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Re: Drifting towards 21

I'm looking forward to the smoking ban, will certainly be interesting!
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