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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 20:04   #1
Tomkat
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Cooking

There have been a few "cooking" based threads on here before, where people tell us all about these absurdly complicated dishes they like to cook and make out like it's a regular occurrence in their kitchen.

Anyway.

This is a bit of a tangent from that "what do you do well" thread we had a while ago.

Gordon Ramsay inspired me!

If you had to make a dish against a "random" person (ie it could be anyone) for a prize of £1million, what dish would you choose to make (they would have to make the same dish)?

And why? (obviously "best tasting dish" wins)

Cost and amount of ingredients are not an issue.
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Last edited by Tomkat; 17 Jul 2006 at 20:22.
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 20:06   #2
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Re: Cooking

A human liver broiled in it's own juices, covered in seaweed and guinness.
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 21:03   #3
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Re: Cooking

French cut fried potatoes. I am brilliant at cooking French cut fried potatoes.
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 21:06   #4
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Re: Cooking

It would probably have to be...

Roasted Gammon Joint glazed with Honey and Mustard.

It tastes orgasmic, in fact id pass up sex to it.
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 21:08   #5
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Re: Cooking

GAMMON?
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 21:31   #6
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
GAMMON?
You've obviously not had decent gammon like pig (hahahaha the irony) describes. I don't know about passing up sex but it certainly makes an awesome meal.


If I could cook any meal, it would have to be a Braised Lamb Shank in Red Wine, with new potatoes, mange tout and peas. All washed down with a fantastic red wine.

Shame I can't cook it really I can cook a pretty decent steak though.
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 21:33   #7
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by furball
If I could cook any meal, it would have to be a Braised Lamb Shank in Red Wine, with new potatoes, mange tout and peas. All washed down with a fantastic red wine.
But surely that is easy for someone to do just as well as you?

I mean apart from the lamb+wine, the rest is just a case of boiling water and throwing them into it and not being a complete spastic with the timings
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 21:33   #8
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Re: Cooking

i'd probably make a lasagna. i'd probably lose, but it would be less embarassing to lose after serving a good lasagna than, say, an excellent bagel sandwich.
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 21:35   #9
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Re: Cooking

Oh in answer to my own thread.

I have quite a limited number of dishes I can cook well, and none are particularly spectacular. I consider myself quite a good cook, but I concern myself more with substance and taste than trying to come off as some sort of magnificent masterchef.

If I had to cook any dish it'd probably be lasagne. Simply because most people (from my experience) aren't that great at cooking it without the use of premade sauces (both for the mince and for the cheese sauce).

I also think my lasagne is pretty good


Oh snap with acropolis - you wrote your thread as I was writing mine.
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 21:49   #10
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tomkat
But surely that is easy for someone to do just as well as you?

I mean apart from the lamb+wine, the rest is just a case of boiling water and throwing them into it and not being a complete spastic with the timings
If you'd read the last line of my post, you'd have seen that I can't actually cook it. Also, it's not that easy to cook - it's quite easy (I think) to do a passable braised lamb shank but a lot harder to do an amazing one.


My choice of meal there would be a steak of any type - as I'm pretty good at cooking a steak exactly medium-rare, exactly medium-well, etc, no matter how thick the steak is. I'm sure that lots of other people can do it too, but there's really not much I can cook .
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 22:01   #11
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Re: Cooking

all of your lasganes would pale in comparison to mine because you wouldn't put in bacon and chicken livers!!!
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 22:03   #12
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Re: Cooking

Is there nothing in which you DON'T put chicken livers?
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 22:06   #13
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by dda
French cut fried potatoes. I am brilliant at cooking French cut fried potatoes.
Is this your subtle way of telling us you work in mcdonalds and aren't a district attorney?
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 22:09   #14
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by Yahwe
all of your lasganes would pale in comparison to mine because you wouldn't put in bacon and chicken livers!!!
I would put in bacon actually!

But not chicken livers
(gross!)
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 23:06   #15
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Re: Cooking

Coconut duck with vegetabales, fried rice and mango. Its awesome, I swear.
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 23:25   #16
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Re: Cooking

I have a tendancy to add beer to the pan to a good steak whilst cooking it...Some have called me odd but I like it.
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 23:30   #17
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Re: Cooking

I'd probably do cottage pie, purely because even if I loose i'd still get a cottage pie at the end of it .

also: semi-on topic, how does one cook rosti? what ratio's of potatoes to onion are needed? anything else i need to know etc?
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Unread 17 Jul 2006, 23:37   #18
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Re: Cooking

Breakfast Tacos.
-scrambled eggs and onions and Mexican rice in a Taco shell. It's unheard of but it's good with coffee.
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Unread 18 Jul 2006, 00:01   #19
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Re: Cooking

Pasta Surprise.

Chicken in a wok, brown it. Mid brown add crunched garlic and chilly (lazy variants is fine but the chook has to be fresh).

Burn the ass of the chicken but turn it down when it browns. Add onion, pepper, and trimmed beans, cut to your pleasure.

Let it simmer then throw in the mushrooms. Now I don't dig fungi but everybody else seems to, and I'm not cooking this for me.

Meantime get your pasta water on the boil with a bit Sussie Salt and PercyPepper. A knob of salted butter is a must. No marge, just good old butter.

Add your sauce. You should of home made this earlier by grilling 8 tomatoes. Asbestos fingers required to peel them, more garlic, some WS and whatever herbs takes you’re fancy. This has to be left over night but if you are feeling naughty quickly fry some Pancetta or some polish sausage. Add it and let the spice, entice. You can over flavour at this stage but for me, a sprinkiling of good old Italian spice does the job.

Ok, take your sauce; drop it in the wok and cover. Put pasta in (your choice of pasta at this point depends upon your mood I guess).

Ok, pasta is tender, drop in wok, stir along with grated cheddar and grated Mozzerella. Serve with a cheeky Rose.

Just a thought. I love to cook.

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Unread 18 Jul 2006, 00:35   #20
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Re: Cooking

a tuna steak baked in olive oil with Indonesian badjak (a sort of chili sauce) and onions with simple white rice and a vegetable mix cooked in a little bit of garlic.
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Unread 18 Jul 2006, 00:49   #21
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Re: Cooking

i'd probably cook sushi, with all sorts of different fillings. Because i love making it, and there is a bit of a knack to getting the rice right (apparently sushi chefs spend 7 years learniing to cook the rice, but i suspect that is bollocks), so i'd be likely to beat a random person just on the rice cooking alone.

and you can make so many different pretty things.

and because i cooked it yesterday and couldn't think of anything else
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Unread 18 Jul 2006, 10:23   #22
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Re: Cooking

Braised Monkfish on Spinach and Potato Cakes with a white wine sauce.

or Roasted Stuffed Peppers are pretty good anytime.
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Unread 18 Jul 2006, 11:43   #23
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Re: Cooking

pot noodle??
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Unread 18 Jul 2006, 11:49   #24
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Re: Cooking

You can't go wrong with well-made sausage and mash (with onion gravy). Or steak and ale pie.

The classics, people, the classics.
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Unread 18 Jul 2006, 18:05   #25
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Re: Cooking

hey internet ive grown up and i can cook
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Unread 18 Jul 2006, 20:09   #26
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by Toccata & Fugue
Canadian chedder
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Unread 18 Jul 2006, 21:59   #27
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tomkat

Simply because most people (from my experience) aren't that great at cooking it without the use of premade sauces (both for the mince and for the cheese sauce).

.

This statement makes me want to cry. In particular, people who use premade sauces for the mince should burn in hell.

I also make a fairly decent lasagne (with bacon (when I remember to buy it) but no chicken livers). Also, do you actually make a cheese sauce for lasagne?! Strange :\ The secret of my white sauce is a bit of nutmeg ;)

If I had to cook a dish it probably would be lasagne because it's simple and I've made it a million times, yet it would be easy for someone who hadn't made it before to **** it up or make it bland.

Or possibly fajitas without the aid of an 'Old El Paso fajita kit' thankyouverymuch.
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Unread 18 Jul 2006, 22:09   #28
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sarina_Joy
In particular, people who use premade sauces for the mince should burn in hell.
I did think it was getting rather toasty in here
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Unread 18 Jul 2006, 22:38   #29
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sarina_Joy
Or possibly fajitas without the aid of an 'Old El Paso fajita kit' thankyouverymuch.
pestle and mortar ftw!

an yo should teast mi jurk chuckken man
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Unread 18 Jul 2006, 22:39   #30
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by Yahwe
ftw!
You just did that to irritate me didn't you?
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Unread 18 Jul 2006, 23:38   #31
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Re: Cooking

if i want nice food sainsburys always has a good selection
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Unread 19 Jul 2006, 11:35   #32
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by Toccata & Fugue
As long Canadian chedder is there with me I'll be fine. Best cheese there is (in the supermarket, I'm sure there are wonderful fresh cheeses but who has the time)
People with taste.
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Unread 19 Jul 2006, 19:35   #33
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Re: Cooking

i bet you prefer botswanan brie and chinese champagne ...
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Unread 19 Jul 2006, 19:43   #34
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by lokken
Is this your subtle way of telling us you work in mcdonalds and aren't a district attorney?
McDonalds went to hell the day they stopped using real potatoes for their fries.
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Unread 19 Jul 2006, 23:58   #35
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Re: Cooking

It's these sorts of threads that make me realise my culniary skills are lacking.
For example, I have never cooked a joint in my life; not one single chicken have I roasted, and not a ham have I pressure-cooked. This is mainly because there's not much point doing it for one when I'm at uni, so basically I'll be ****ed when I eventually have to do such things.

I tend to do more "adjustable" meals such as curries, special fried rice (I do this quite well if I say so myself), stirfry, omlettes etc. In other words standard student type fare.
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Unread 20 Jul 2006, 15:18   #36
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Re: Cooking

Fruit De Mer
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Unread 20 Jul 2006, 16:41   #37
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by meglamaniac
I tend to do more "adjustable" meals such as curries, special fried rice (I do this quite well if I say so myself), stirfry, omlettes etc. In other words standard student type fare.
That doesn't mean you're not a good cook though. There's a world of difference between what sounds good and what tastes good. In fact, in my experience there's next to no correlation between how good a cook somebody is, and how good a cook they sound like when talking about food.

I think most people who 'just make food' often end up being better at it than people doing meals with specific names. I mean, some people just *get* seasoning and what fits together. On the other hand people who follow big recipes and buy fancy ingredients often end up with merely edible food.
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Unread 20 Jul 2006, 17:46   #38
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Re: Cooking

i would probably do chilli actually, as its something thats very subjective to taste


or sausages with an onion gravy and mash with some wholegrain mustard is also very tasty
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Unread 20 Jul 2006, 17:52   #39
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by roadrunner_0
i would probably do chilli actually, as its something thats very subjective to taste


or sausages with an onion gravy and mash with some wholegrain mustard is also very tasty
Put some mustard in the gravy for great justice \o/
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Unread 20 Jul 2006, 22:54   #40
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Re: Cooking

it depends, as i tend to put worcestershire sauce in my gravy anyway
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Unread 21 Jul 2006, 14:54   #41
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Re: Cooking

That too. And some ale or red wine, depends what kind of sausage you're using.

****, right I'm going shopping.
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Unread 21 Jul 2006, 22:33   #42
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Re: Cooking

for bangers and mash, i thoroughly reccomend walls' 'with a hint of black pepper' ones


avoid toulouse sausage like the plague unless you want to be left alone the next day


(also, i have a cast iron mortar and pestle thats really nice to use)
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Unread 23 Jul 2006, 01:42   #43
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Re: Cooking

At around midday today, I shall start cooking around 150 sunday roasts in addition to the standard menu that we serve.

So, excuse me if I don't participate in this thread - I hate cooking!
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Unread 23 Jul 2006, 02:07   #44
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by skiddy
At around midday today, I shall start cooking around 150 sunday roasts in addition to the standard menu that we serve.

So, excuse me if I don't participate in this thread - I hate cooking!
err... i thought you worked with computers?
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Unread 23 Jul 2006, 10:45   #45
skiddy
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Re: Cooking

I do.
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Unread 23 Jul 2006, 14:52   #46
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Re: Cooking

so what the **** are you doing cooking for that amount of people?
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Unread 23 Jul 2006, 15:11   #47
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Re: Cooking

Computers have to eat too!
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Unread 23 Jul 2006, 15:24   #48
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Re: Cooking

im pretty sure that if you gave a computer a sunday lunch it would just sit there and not eat it
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Unread 23 Jul 2006, 15:32   #49
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by roadrunner_0
im pretty sure that if you gave a computer a sunday lunch it would just sit there and not eat it
Yours is just faddy
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Unread 23 Jul 2006, 17:59   #50
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Re: Cooking

Quote:
Originally Posted by roadrunner_0
so what the **** are you doing cooking for that amount of people?
homeless shelter?
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