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Unread 6 Dec 2007, 03:13   #1
milo
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Dead Canoist story

This is insane. People like this exist! You and your wife pretend to the entire world - including your children and family; that you're dead just so you can claim the insurance money. You then move to Panama, usefully pose for a photograph thats later used as evidence agasint you, have an apparent falling out (did she have an affair over there?) then have your life come crashing down around you.
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Unread 6 Dec 2007, 11:42   #2
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Re: Dead Canoist story

That photograph was a really dumb idea.
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Unread 6 Dec 2007, 12:53   #3
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Exclamation Re: Dead Canoist story

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Originally Posted by milo
This is insane.
This is ... TEESSIDE!
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Unread 6 Dec 2007, 14:24   #4
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Re: Dead Canoist story

I like they way the whole question of where he was for five years was 'I don't know'. I wonder how long it took them to think up that excuse.
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Unread 6 Dec 2007, 16:22   #5
milo
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Re: Dead Canoist story

Ok the sons were in it as well. Coded messages to only use phoneboxes eh? The only way this could get any more bizzare is if one of the sons turn around and say

'i love me mam, no youse don unda stand man...i love me mam...like propa love me mam...shes dead fit like'
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Unread 9 Dec 2007, 00:24   #6
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Re: Dead Canoist story

I love the fact they are called "Mr and Mrs Darwin".

I'm sure its already been said by someone somewhere but i'm almost sure Darwinian theory didnt involve an intelligent design. Much like their plan to commit fraud.

(lol lol lol)

Oh and hi. Im back!
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Unread 9 Dec 2007, 03:51   #7
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Re: Dead Canoist story

reggie perin innit
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Unread 10 Dec 2007, 16:10   #8
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Re: Dead Canoist story

If you got in trouble off the coast of Hartlepool its not uncommon to turn up alive 5 years later with zero recall. Granted you've usually got two heads and webbed feet but still.
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Unread 10 Dec 2007, 18:43   #9
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Re: Dead Canoist story

Quote:
Originally Posted by All Systems Go
I like they way the whole question of where he was for five years was 'I don't know'. I wonder how long it took them to think up that excuse.
Well, true but I'm not sure what else would be any better. Most answers are going to be pretty easy to disprove or be stupidly elaborate and unbelievable. You know the sort of thing, you went to Australia to find out about magic numbers, a giant magnet pulled the plane out of the sky, you then found yourself on a magic island where some dinosaur started attacking you, but it turned out to be jesus....that sort of thing.
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Unread 10 Dec 2007, 18:47   #10
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Re: Dead Canoist story

Well, yeah but they might have thought about that before they decided to do it.

Also, they had 5 years, if they had put some effort into it they could have possibly thought of something plausable.
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Unread 12 Dec 2007, 19:05   #11
Marilyn Manson
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Exclamation Re: Dead Canoist story

Quote:
Originally Posted by All Systems Go
Also, they had 5 years, if they had put some effort into it they could have possibly thought of something plausable.
Effort? wtf? We're talkling about people from Teesside here. The last time we put any effort into anything was when we lynched that monkey during Napoleon's time. Oh yeah. He got lynched that ****er real good.

We are physically and intellectually incapable of putting any effort into anything ever. (Of course I include myself in this) I'm sure they knew that they would be caught from day one. The point was not to avoid detection but to enjoy the limited amount of time living up 'the high life' that was avaliable to them. Teesside people make life up as they go along. I suspect he didn't even decide to fake his own death until he was actually getting into the canoe.
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Unread 12 Dec 2007, 19:23   #12
All Systems Go
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Re: Dead Canoist story

You know, he probably never actually in the canoe.

Maybe they could have their own sit-com. Each week they could try a new get-rich-quick scheme, with hilarious consequences. Episode 1: They Canoe couple try and cheat on Who Wants To be a Millionaire. Special Guests: Chris Tarrant and Charles Ingram.

One further thought occurs, Maddy MacCain was on the front page of the paper for 6 months, surly they would have been better off trying to do they 'I'm not dead' thing when the press were involved in something else.
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Unread 12 Dec 2007, 19:24   #13
Marilyn Manson
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Exclamation Re: Dead Canoist story

I know there was a canoe. Trust me on this.
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