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16 Mar 2005, 19:16
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#1
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Woman Sues Plumber
A woman hires the local plumber to come and fit her new shower upstairs. As he is a well known and respected member of the community , she gives him the keys to the house and just tells him to lock up when hes done. The woman goes off to work leaving the plumber to get on with his job. After the first day, she comes home, the work looks as though its going well, but her dog appears a bit quiet. Normally he bounds up to her as she enters the house , today he just wanders up and whines a bit. After a few more days have passed, the same pattern repeats. The work is going well, but each day, the dog appears to be more and more subdued.
As she leaves the dog in the kitchen, she decides to put a small Spy camera in there. The camera detects any motion in the kitchen and records it to her computer upstairs. She comes home that evening, and the dog doesnt even move from its basket. It just looks at her and then puts its head back down. Concerned, she goes upstairs to check on the bathroom. Its almost finished, the plumbing is seamless, and shes very pleased. She logs onto the computer and runs back the spy camera footage for the day. Shes absoloutely shocked to see the plumber walk into the kitchen naked and start shagging her dog. She immediately phones him and complains about his conduct, threatening to sue him for what he has done to her dog.
"Im sorry Miss , im afraid you cant do that"
"Why the hell not, ive got you on camera shagging my dog"
"Yes Miss, but if you check my qualifications, youll find im Corgi registered"
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And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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16 Mar 2005, 21:06
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#2
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cynic
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Bishop Auckland Co. Durham
Posts: 8,809
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
oh dear lord
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lazy
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16 Mar 2005, 21:19
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#3
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I play the double-bass.
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Germany
Posts: 2,198
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
this joke has no international qualitiy.
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The music called Jaazzz..
Charlie Mingus, such nimble fingers
Droppin the bass, all over the place
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16 Mar 2005, 21:36
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#4
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Chief over all Monkeys
Join Date: Apr 2003
Posts: 1,771
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
i had to look up what corgi was before i found this remotely funny
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16 Mar 2005, 21:42
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#5
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-=Murderous Plush Toy=-
Join Date: Nov 2001
Posts: 971
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
if you told this joke in a pub, you'd get bottled :/
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-Lucky #plush
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Does anyone actually play this anymore?
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16 Mar 2005, 22:00
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#6
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I am.
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 6,580
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
dace tells me corgis are too small to enjoy shagging them.
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hi
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16 Mar 2005, 22:04
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#7
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Aardvark is a funny word
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: I'm No Nino Rota
Posts: 5,923
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
Quote:
Originally Posted by Luckeh!!!!
if you told this joke in a pub, you'd get bottled :/
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****ing hell, tough crowd :eek:
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Efficiency, efficiency they say
Get to know the date and tell the time of day
As the crowds begin complaining
How the Beaujolais is raining
Down on darkened meetings on the Champs Élysées
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16 Mar 2005, 22:04
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#8
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Raaaaaaaah!
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 2,296
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
Just because he's a qualified plumper doesn't mean he can do that and it certainly doesn't protect him in eyes of the law, I advise this woman is going to contact her solicitor at once
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Hicks
Mercury & Solace
Always [Fury]
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16 Mar 2005, 22:09
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#9
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Heh, Leeds !
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In The Redfern
Posts: 3,790
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hicks
Just because he's a qualified plumper doesn't mean he can do that and it certainly doesn't protect him in eyes of the law, I advise this woman is going to contact her solicitor at once
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Once the solicitor has finished shagging her labrador.
~Vaio~
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The George Harrison of BlueTuba
Yes, I know he is dead !
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16 Mar 2005, 22:11
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#10
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Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vaio
Once the solicitor has finished shagging her labrador.
~Vaio~
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TBH , with your average solicitors fees (excluding the no win no fee mob) , the solicitor would be shagging her as much as anything else.
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And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
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16 Mar 2005, 22:47
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#11
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wild one
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: River Edge, NJ
Posts: 3,313
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kurashima
TBH , with your average solicitors fees (excluding the no win no fee mob) , the solicitor would be shagging her as much as anything else.
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Thats why women choose Yahwe
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16 Mar 2005, 23:21
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#12
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Old Man O Deh *****s
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In spelelpee land
Posts: 3,516
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
Quote:
You are not authorized to ban users who are not considered normal, registered users
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CURSES !
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Dead_Meat
You dont need to keep beating a dog to get it to stop shitting on the carpet
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17 Mar 2005, 09:39
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#13
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 3,174
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
There are normal users here?
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If one person is in delusion, they're called insane.
If many people are in delusion, it's called a religion.
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17 Mar 2005, 10:53
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#14
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Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
Frankly I think Kura should be sued for using such a shit joke.
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17 Mar 2005, 12:34
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#15
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cynic
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Bishop Auckland Co. Durham
Posts: 8,809
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
personally, i think that her dog is a lab-ra-whore
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lazy
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17 Mar 2005, 12:43
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#16
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Clerk
Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 13,940
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
Doesn't Corgi registration apply mainly to gas fitters, not plumbers?
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17 Mar 2005, 15:02
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#17
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Registered User
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: South Pacific
Posts: 4,911
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
Doesn't Corgi registration apply mainly to gas fitters, not plumbers?
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yeap. she must be doing an "auschwitz" themed shower or something.
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I think it's time we blow this scene, get everybody and the stuff together..........
ok 3..... 2..... 1.. let's jam
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17 Mar 2005, 17:18
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#18
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 3,174
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
the quality of jokes has gone downhill, and i find that rather incredible...
__________________
If one person is in delusion, they're called insane.
If many people are in delusion, it's called a religion.
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17 Mar 2005, 18:14
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#19
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J to the C to the A G E
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Scúnthorpe
Posts: 5,583
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
Aren't gas fitters just plumbers anyway?
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17 Mar 2005, 18:33
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#20
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wild one
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: River Edge, NJ
Posts: 3,313
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Re: Woman Sues Plumber
Quote:
Originally Posted by roadrunner_0
personally, i think that her dog is a lab-ra-whore
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Next time I see you I'm going to punch you in the face.
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