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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 00:03   #1
Blastoderm
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Constantine

If you haven't watched it, please, please, please (I'm begging you) do not watch it.

It is utterly shite.


I liked the character but the movie made my mate sleep for a good 30 mins.


And I got a headache when the film ended.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 00:09   #2
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Re: Constantine

And to offer a contrasting and different opinion.

I liked it.

Whilst I was a tad annoyed at the lack of complete action that the trailer seemed to indicate would fill the film to the brim, the plot was at least half decent, and actually concluded the story well.

As was typical of new comic book conversions, it's been left open enough for the sequel / trilogy that inevitably happens. If you are a DC/ Dark Horse comics fan then its worth checking out.

Plus the trailer for Sin City makes it look amazing.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 00:10   #3
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by idimmu
i thought it was really good. Keanu was better than he was in any of the Matrix films, the story made sense and was concise and actually interesting and intriguing.

i don't see what the problem could have been

Satan, was cool.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 00:10   #4
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Re: Constantine

It's a shit movie. Like the vast majority of these comic book movies
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 00:21   #5
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Re: Constantine

i didn't hear much good about it so far. was there any good movie this year so far? the only one i can think of is Saw (but we are usually behind a few month, so thats probably old)
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 01:04   #6
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Re: Constantine

Do go see House of Flying Daggers.
  • Chinese people are immortal
  • The Chinese Army is ****ing scary
  • Ninja's are cool, even if they're Chinese.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 01:12   #7
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by Leshy
Do go see House of Flying Daggers.
  • Chinese people are immortal
  • The Chinese Army is ****ing scary
  • Ninja's are cool, even if they're Chinese.
This type of movie does not appeal to me.

The famous Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon bored me.

I'm waiting to rent Hero and see if that's going to change my opinion.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 01:25   #8
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Re: Constantine

reeves bored me away from the matrix, so i'm not shocked you disliked something with him in.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 01:45   #9
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Re: Constantine

i literally cannot wait for Sin City. it looks like an absolutely brilliant film. plus its cast is simply astonishing.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 08:17   #10
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by Leshy
Do go see House of Flying Daggers.
  • Chinese people are immortal
  • The Chinese Army is ****ing scary
  • Ninja's are cool, even if they're Chinese.
I agree... 't was a cool movie.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 10:15   #11
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Re: Constantine

Constantine looks pretty shite. My friends invited me to the cinema on Tuesday to see it, but I declined and made a snobby comment about it being rubbish and Keanu Reeves a terrible actor.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 10:24   #12
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by wu_trax
i didn't hear much good about it so far. was there any good movie this year so far? the only one i can think of is Saw (but we are usually behind a few month, so thats probably old)
I didn't really like Saw although I suppose it was better than a lot of other horror stuff.

I've not seen any particularly brilliant movie this year. The last two I bothered watching were - The Machinist which was OK (nothing special) andThe Woodsman (about a paedo) which was a little dull.

The films I'm vaguely looking forward to this year : Sin City, Hitch Hikers and the new Batman film. I will obviously watch the new Star Wars movie so I can have some righteous indignation over how terrible it will be.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 10:47   #13
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Re: Constantine

I thought it was worth watching

My mate thought it was brilliant

My other mate diddnt comment
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 10:52   #14
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Re: Constantine

taken as a film by itself, constantine isnt bad, not great, but its fairly well put together with decent acting (what, keanu cant act?!?!?!) and generally entertaining.


taken as a comic book adaptation its a ****ing travesty of justice and whoever did the script and altered the baseline of the story arc that much (ennis and delano) should have known better
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 10:57   #15
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Re: Constantine

It was ok. But sadly when I see reeves I always think about the Matrix. I can't take him seriously in any other movies.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 10:59   #16
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by Toccata & Fugue
Yeah I haven't read the comic book, but obviously I wil be posting similar sentiments when they screw up Watchman, V for Vendetta et al.

i think that that is always going to be the problem for comic book adaptations, especially the less mainstream and more cult ones
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 11:07   #17
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Re: Constantine

Anything with Keanu can not fail, heathens that say otherwise
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 12:12   #18
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Re: Constantine

Constantine is a terrible film. It's not even funny bad, it's just mediocre bad. Reeves gives a trademarked lifeless performance, the directing was absolutely abysmal, the film had plot holes galore, the script was lazy and hack-like, especially when dealing with FORESHADOWING!!!, some of it was very very silly without appearing to realise this... the list goes on.

The only good thing about it I can think of immediately is "Gabriel".

Quote:
Originally Posted by Toccata & Fugue
Yeah I haven't read the comic book, but obviously I wil be posting similar sentiments when they screw up Watchman, V for Vendetta et al.
I'm cautiously optimistic over Watchmen. Greengrass and Hayter have done some good stuff.

But V will be an abomination.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zar
It's a shit movie. Like the vast majority of these comic book movies
Spiderman and Spiderman 2 were good, as were X and X-2. The Hulk was poor, Catwoman was... Catwoman. Exactly 50% of the Batman films so far were excellent. The Superman films are pretty elderly and so don't really count (plus I can't remember a thing about how good they are).

Hellboy was "ok", but it's fairly explicit that Del Toro was going for a "generic action movie" so it would be possible to make a Hellboy 2 that was more in keeping with the feel of the original work.

What else is there, I forget.

[edit]

LXG! From Hell!

They should just stop making Alan Moore works into films.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 12:13   #19
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante Hicks
I didn't really like Saw although I suppose it was better than a lot of other horror stuff.
well, the end didn't make too much sense, but other than that, id say that it was pretty good.

Quote:
I've not seen any particularly brilliant movie this year. The last two I bothered watching were - The Machinist which was OK (nothing special) andThe Woodsman (about a paedo) which was a little dull.

The films I'm vaguely looking forward to this year : Sin City, Hitch Hikers and the new Batman film. I will obviously watch the new Star Wars movie so I can have some righteous indignation over how terrible it will be.
i never even heared of sin city or a new badman movie . yes, star wars is going to be crap like the last two. hitch hikes guide will probably worth watching, but other than that? there is nothing good out and nothing good coming out. War of the worlds maybe, but probably not.
i guess we will end up just like in the music industry, with lots of cheap mainstream massmarket crap that isnt really bad but not really good either.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 12:19   #20
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Re: Constantine

Batman. It's got Christian Bale in it. The screenplay being written by David S. Goyer is a bit of a worry, though. At least it won't be as silly as Batman and Robin.

Quote:
Originally Posted by wu_trax
i guess we will end up just like in the music industry, with lots of cheap mainstream massmarket crap that isnt really bad but not really good either.
"Cheap"? I can't believe you mean this in an "inexpensive" kind of way.

Also, the film industry is pretty much the same as I remember it for... as long as I can remember it. Saying that we've reached the end of an era or that things are changing is usually down to people not remembering how it was a 5, 10 years ago.

You also get very few "top class" films being released in the first few months of the year, because 1. people aren't going to the cinemas so much and 2. by the time the oscars roll round everyone will have forgotten it.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 12:21   #21
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blastoderm
This type of movie does not appeal to me.

The famous Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon bored me.

I'm waiting to rent Hero and see if that's going to change my opinion.
I liked Hero alot more that Crouch Tiger.

Rent it its cool
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 12:37   #22
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri
Batman. It's got Christian Bale in it. The screenplay being written by David S. Goyer is a bit of a worry, though. At least it won't be as silly as Batman and Robin.
typo


Quote:
"Cheap"? I can't believe you mean this in an "inexpensive" kind of way.

Also, the film industry is pretty much the same as I remember it for... as long as I can remember it. Saying that we've reached the end of an era or that things are changing is usually down to people not remembering how it was a 5, 10 years ago.

You also get very few "top class" films being released in the first few months of the year, because 1. people aren't going to the cinemas so much and 2. by the time the oscars roll round everyone will have forgotten it.
no, i don't, more like in terms of storyline and stuff. i can somehow understand that. if i had to pay a few 100 million to produce a movie i wouldn't want to take any more risk than absolutly necessary, but still it sucks and it doesnt result in movies you remember.
and no, it became worse. look at all the sequals and remakes and crap or all those horrible comedies. ten years ago it wasn't this bad (or at least they didn'T release those movies here, i have no idea). i hardly go to cinema at all anymore.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 13:08   #23
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by wu_trax
no, i don't, more like in terms of storyline and stuff. i can somehow understand that. if i had to pay a few 100 million to produce a movie i wouldn't want to take any more risk than absolutly necessary, but still it sucks and it doesnt result in movies you remember.
and no, it became worse. look at all the sequals and remakes and crap or all those horrible comedies. ten years ago it wasn't this bad (or at least they didn'T release those movies here, i have no idea). i hardly go to cinema at all anymore.
Jurassic Park 2 was released 8 years ago, and that's one of the first things that spring to mind with "hideous sequels". Batman Forever (a REALLY hideous sequel) was released 10 years ago. Dumb and Dumber (horrible comedy) was released 11 years ago. Independence Day is 9 years old, if you want an "original franchise".

There wasn't the vogue for remakes of old films (well, not as much; that's something that's been growing over the last few years), but there was still the outpouring of shite.

People always forget the shit they had to wade through. It's one of those constant errors that most happens with films and games.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 13:23   #24
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Re: Constantine

i didn't say there were no sequals, just less than today. today most movies are left open at the end (if it's something new) so that they can make some crappy sequal if they work out.
was Independence Day a remake? or do you just mention it as a crap movie? i dont think it's crap, it's just american.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 14:19   #25
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Re: Constantine

I don't know why anyone would go and see it. I stayed at home this month and watched American Splendor, Goodbye Lenin, Adaptation, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, and Super Size Me, and i'm certain that i didnt miss anything in not going to see another "awesomeoriffic" hollywood blockbuster.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 15:42   #26
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Re: Constantine

I'd also like to recommend House of Flying Daggers. If you can sit through that film without laughing your head off at least once you're a stronger man than I. Right up there with We Were Soldiers in the realism stakes.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 16:04   #27
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Re: Constantine

Damn, i disagree with so many people on this thread i dont know where to start lol

Ill just say what i think anyways

I thought constantine was a good film to see at the cinema, the ending was pretty clever (although people kept telling me it had a great twist, that ending is NOT a twist its just a good solution). The film was pretty much as i expected it though and i enjoyed it and even thought about getting the DVD when it comes out (after i get Bad Santa).

I did think some of the story was forced (like the whole twin sister background story) but the rest was interesting. The films context is definately something i've always been interested in, Angels fighting demons, god vs the devil ect and the film used these ideas well.

Ive not read the comic so i cant pass judgement on how the writers fooked over the source but hey, this is Hollywood and they like to alter things for film, especially if it relates to Britain in someway!

I totally disagree with films being better 10years ago, that is total BS. The only major factor for the "big" films from a decade ago, is that CGI was such a new and exciting turn-on for moviegoers, that it was the catalyst for many big budget films.

I was only young when Independance day came out but the spectacal of an alien invasion was like a wet dream to teenage lads. It may not stand the test of time but i thought that film rocked when i first saw it and thats what counts!
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 18:02   #28
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by wu_trax
i didn't say there were no sequals, just less than today. today most movies are left open at the end (if it's something new) so that they can make some crappy sequal if they work out.
Sequelosity isn't anything new, although the most blatent one I've seen was Underworld, from a couple of years ago.
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 18:03   #29
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by Seth Mace
Ive not read the comic so i cant pass judgement on how the writers fooked over the source but hey, this is Hollywood and they like to alter things for film, especially if it relates to Britain in someway!
The main problem is that EVERYTHING that is in any way right with the film was from the comic. All the changes have been ones to make the film worse.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Seth Mace
I was only young when Independance day came out but the spectacal of an alien invasion was like a wet dream to teenage lads. It may not stand the test of time but i thought that film rocked when i first saw it and thats what counts!
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 18:29   #30
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Re: Constantine

You missed "The Punisher" on your list of comic book -> films, Mark.

I haven't seen it, but it looks pretty cruddy
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Unread 24 Mar 2005, 20:19   #31
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by JonnyBGood
If you can sit through that film without laughing your head off at least once you're a stronger man than I.
Yeah, I'm not.

The part where you-know-who with the you-know-what in the you-know-where gets up from under the you-know-what had us break out in laughter too.
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Unread 25 Mar 2005, 03:02   #32
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tomkat
You missed "The Punisher" on your list of comic book -> films, Mark.

I haven't seen it, but it looks pretty cruddy

Now, see, the thing there is, Punisher is actually complete and utter laughable shite.

spectacularly

off the deep end

from the cliched facial poses to the "sailor henchman" (Kevin Nash) wearing a red an white striped shirt. The entire film from start to finish, is just complete and utter mince, and left open for a sequel.

why oh why oh why.

Even Travolta was utter shit in it.

it tops dungeons and dragons in the shitness category.
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Unread 26 Mar 2005, 12:53   #33
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Re: Constantine

I watched Constantine yesterday, thought it was boring and shit
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Unread 26 Mar 2005, 16:20   #34
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Re: Constantine

Constantine was ok.

As for films to go see, when "War of Worlds" comes out, that should be figgin ace! xXx: Another Level looks ok but have no clue how Ice Cube fits into the role - looks like another sequel where Vin Diesel isn't appearing (except Chronicles of Riddick)...!

For all those Kung Fu Haters/Likers, Kung Fu Hussle is coming out whenever - it's a funny film according to the trailer - should be good For those out now, Zatoichi by Takeshi should make you go "" - Hero is a shit film btw.
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Unread 26 Mar 2005, 17:12   #35
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Re: Constantine

Only movies I was impressed-ish with this year so far have been The Woodsman (as said before) and Kinsey. Neither were overly special but well worth watching, unlike Constantine imo, though it wasn't bad it was just too bland and predictable for my liking. Keanu's attempts at being an anti-hero seemed far too fake and forced for my liking (even though I too, am into the whole Angels/Demons thing).

Edit: Why was Gabriel(the angel) a woman by the way? Was it explained during the movie, I must've missed it.
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Unread 26 Mar 2005, 17:19   #36
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Re: Constantine

Gabriel wasn't a woman, Gabriel was androgenous. But played by a woman.
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Unread 26 Mar 2005, 17:45   #37
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Re: Constantine

Androgenous in the movie but I'm fairly sure it's stated in the bible that Gabriel takes form of a man.

(I'm not trying to be pedantic I was just curious of any specific reasons for the change, other than the more angelic presence radiated by Tidla Swinton.)
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Unread 26 Mar 2005, 19:08   #38
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Re: Constantine

Well the bible aint exactly Gods Word now is it now;P

(no offense intended to any1!)
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Unread 26 Mar 2005, 19:40   #39
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Re: Constantine

There have not been any really decent films out for quite a while in my opinion now, if you look at cinema guides, there are loads of films being released every week, but all utter crap. Darkness is quite possibly the WORST film in the entire history of the motion picture, yet people still go and watch this drivel and thats why more drivel gets released.
Seeing as i work in the cinema industry, i know for a fact that only about 1/5 films make a profit, all the rest make a loss, due to production/distribution costs etc. I just do no understand why so much crap is being released nowadays. Although as was also stated previously in this thread, start of the year is crap for films. there are some decent films planned later this year, Sin City, King Kong etc, and a few others which look completely watchable.

oh and constantine was only o.k. but don't come and watch it at my cinema, as the print is ****ed.
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Unread 26 Mar 2005, 19:59   #40
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Re: Constantine

Whilst it failed to fall into the 'omg, i must see that again before i die' category, it was definitely a watchable movie.

This oppinion was probably helped by the fact that i've never read the comics around which it was based.

I've seen far worse movies in my time.
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Unread 26 Mar 2005, 20:15   #41
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by Androme2
Constantine was ok.

As for films to go see, when "War of Worlds" comes out, that should be figgin ace!
Didnt realise there was a re-make coming out?
I liked the original
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Unread 26 Mar 2005, 20:35   #42
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Re: Constantine

it looked okay when i read directed by steven steilberg (spelling), but dropped when i heard it starred tom cruise. i just hope he doesnt go all 'american' in it.
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Unread 26 Mar 2005, 23:28   #43
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Re: Constantine

I liked this movie.

I also liked:
Hellboy
Punisher
X2
Spiderman
Blade Trilogy
Constantine

I didn't like:
Daredevil
The Hulk
Spawn

Spideman2 didn't suck, but it wasn't good either,

I predict Fantastic 4 will blow ass chunks
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Unread 26 Mar 2005, 23:44   #44
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by sniborp
it looked okay when i read directed by steven steilberg (spelling), but dropped when i heard it starred tom cruise. i just hope he doesnt go all 'american' in it.
Don't underestimate Tom Cruise. He may have the reputation of an action film oik, but he's been in some good films.
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Unread 26 Mar 2005, 23:53   #45
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by MrL_JaKiri
Don't underestimate Tom Cruise. He may have the reputation of an action film oik, but he's been in some good films.
Namely Collateral.
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Unread 26 Mar 2005, 23:55   #46
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by s|k
Daredevil
I don't know why I thought that was 'just' ok. Maybe it was the soundtrack. Maybe it was the actors/actress.
Mmmmmm..... Jennifer Garner
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Unread 27 Mar 2005, 00:32   #47
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Re: Constantine

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blastoderm
Namely Collateral.


The ending to that film ruined any goodness it might have had.
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Unread 27 Mar 2005, 02:27   #48
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Re: Constantine

Have you seen all of the War of World trailers? Tom Cruise looks good in them.

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