|
26 Nov 2004, 20:00
|
#1
|
Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
|
Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
Yes , another week has passed, life has moved on, the England Cricket team has had its test to Zimbabwe thrown into doubt by Mugabe's regime , Prince Harry has gotten very drunk and escaped from his security frequently, The Ukraine teeters on the verge of civil war, and theres yet another "Im a Non-Entity, get me in the Papers". But this week , theres only one thing that truly deserves to be the caption contest
But im the prince of ****ing darkness!
Yes , poor old Ozzy Osbourne. After 12 years of relative peace and quiet in Los Angeles, no sooner has he moved back to the UK than some chav ****er wanders into his mansion and lifts a million quid worth of Jewellery. Sharon's a bit upset, Ozzy had the guy in a headlock before he escaped, whilst naked no less. Grappling with a naked prince of Darkness? Sounds like every Goth Girl's dream, but anyway. Caption away GD!
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
|
|
|
26 Nov 2004, 20:42
|
#2
|
Made of Twigs
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 5,459
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"I told you Simon Cowell would have the last laugh"
__________________
If I hadn't seen such riches, I could live with being poor - James
It's hard to be humble when you're as great as I am - Muhammad Ali
So **** y'all, all of y'all; if y'all don't like me, blow me! - Dr. Dre
|
|
|
26 Nov 2004, 23:42
|
#3
|
It was a Stupid Dream
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Winchester, UK
Posts: 2,077
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"errahh erahffds ashhhdfsa fdskfkas sharon"
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 01:03
|
#4
|
so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Ozzy comforted Sharon when they heard that although both Kelly and Jack had been nominated for 'Ugliest Celebrity Kid' only one of them could win it"
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 01:04
|
#5
|
so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"After being forced to listen to Kelly's latest album Ozzy comforted Sharon"
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 01:08
|
#6
|
so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"They may have robbed me of my jewels but they'll never take my dignity"
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 01:11
|
#7
|
so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"They may have robbed me of my jewels but they'll never take my coherency"
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 01:11
|
#8
|
so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"They may have robbed me of my jewels but they'll never take my jewels"
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 01:13
|
#9
|
so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Sadly Sharon's cancer exited remission and resulted in a hideous tumour growing out the side of her face"
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 01:14
|
#10
|
so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"If you had to wrestle with a naked Ozzy you'd want some kind of pay off too"
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 01:16
|
#11
|
so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"If only someone would steal our kids"
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 01:20
|
#12
|
so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Following the incident Ozzy was so shocked he stopped shaking"
[/paraphrasing Frank Skinner gag]
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 01:26
|
#13
|
so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Ironically no camera footage of the break-in was captured"
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 01:33
|
#14
|
Lucky
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: -
Posts: 3,830
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"sharooon! where's my lance armstrong wristband?"
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 01:39
|
#15
|
so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Coming soon: The X(tra security) Factor"
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 01:59
|
#16
|
so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"I feel unhappy
I feel so sad
I lost the best jewels
That I ever had
They were my womans
She loved them so
But it's too late now
I've let the intruder go
I'm going through changes
I'm going through changes
We shared the sparkle
Me and Shaz each day
In trance together
The jewels held sway
But soon the world
Had its evil way
My house was robbed
Jewels went astray
I'm going through changes
I'm going through changes
It took too long
To realize
That I could hear
Some thievin' guys
Now all my nights
Are filled with fear
Wish I could go back
And change this year
I'm going through changes
I'm going through changes"
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 02:00
|
#17
|
The Arson Specialist
Join Date: May 2002
Location: The Deep Shores of Hell
Posts: 524
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Yeah we've been robbed. So fooking what?"
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dace
i like infernos avatar
|
Please dont laugh at me. I'm not trying to be funny.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 02:00
|
#18
|
so f*cking zen
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Hitting Bottom
Posts: 8,499
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
I would just like to make clear that i made that song up all on my own and didn't copy it from anywhere*
*seriously ... in case people think i lack any semblence of talent (alternative version can be found here)
__________________
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 02:12
|
#19
|
________
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Somwhere I belong
Posts: 4,474
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Should have gone to Specsavers"
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by blink 182
Breathing deeply, walking backwards,
finding strength to call and ask her
Roller coaster favorite ride,
let me kiss you one last time.
|
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 02:13
|
#20
|
________
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Somwhere I belong
Posts: 4,474
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Rememeber Ozzy, you can't swear on live TV"
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by blink 182
Breathing deeply, walking backwards,
finding strength to call and ask her
Roller coaster favorite ride,
let me kiss you one last time.
|
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 05:24
|
#21
|
Banned
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 2,442
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
Dace completes the fatality.
fs there is no angles I could come up with that haven't been done superbly by dace already.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 08:20
|
#22
|
share the <3
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Location: Location:
Posts: 2,709
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
drink! arse! dace! feck! <3 flav
'i don't mind the robbery but the bastard wore a busted t-shirt'
'i wondered what the swimming pool cleaner wanted in the bedroom'
'sharon osbourne denied she invited the naked intruder to inspect her jewels'
'jack's addictions made him desperate'
__________________
Sophie is hotter than you
though ive gone off her now; the way Susanna Reid squirms around on sml is, however, awesome
Last edited by Nusselt; 28 Nov 2004 at 22:54.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 12:46
|
#23
|
Miles Teg
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Dom City
Posts: 5,192
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
there should be a limitation on the number of entries
and
'jack's addictions made him desperate' is too serious tbfh
__________________
Audentes Fortuna Iuvat
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 12:59
|
#24
|
Insanely Insignificant
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Bournemouth
Posts: 1,056
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'Shocked as they were, the Osbournes fail to notice the guy trying to streal Sharon's necklace'
__________________
Very nearly there.
All is nothing, without you.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 13:19
|
#25
|
Insanely Insignificant
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Bournemouth
Posts: 1,056
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'News that their sex tapes had also been stolen didn't sit well with the Osbournes'
__________________
Very nearly there.
All is nothing, without you.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 13:28
|
#26
|
Insanely Insignificant
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Bournemouth
Posts: 1,056
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'The combined effect of their hair products makes the Osbournes inseparable'
__________________
Very nearly there.
All is nothing, without you.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 13:29
|
#27
|
Insanely Insignificant
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Bournemouth
Posts: 1,056
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'Ozzy's 'Gabrielle'-attempt to cover his black eye was fooling noone'
__________________
Very nearly there.
All is nothing, without you.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 13:30
|
#28
|
Insanely Insignificant
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Bournemouth
Posts: 1,056
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'The Osbourne's were only to happy to oblige when someone shouted 'Show us your orgasm face!''
__________________
Very nearly there.
All is nothing, without you.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 13:34
|
#29
|
Insanely Insignificant
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Bournemouth
Posts: 1,056
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'Sharon puts on a brave face at the local Special Needs school'
__________________
Very nearly there.
All is nothing, without you.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 13:35
|
#30
|
Insanely Insignificant
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Bournemouth
Posts: 1,056
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'The Osbournes look dismayed as news that Jack got Kelly pregnant surfaces'
__________________
Very nearly there.
All is nothing, without you.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 13:38
|
#31
|
Insanely Insignificant
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Bournemouth
Posts: 1,056
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'Despite revelations about Sharon's three-in-a-bed sessions with Simon and Louis, the Osbournes remain strong'
[\boredom sated]
__________________
Very nearly there.
All is nothing, without you.
|
|
|
27 Nov 2004, 23:33
|
#32
|
I dunno...
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: manchester
Posts: 1,502
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Simon Cowell's wig worked a treat - he finally got a shag off Sharon."
__________________
He shall drink naught but brine, for I'll not show him / Where the quick freshes are.
Last edited by Boogster; 29 Nov 2004 at 06:43.
|
|
|
28 Nov 2004, 04:05
|
#33
|
BlueTuba
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 6,339
|
Is Sharon saying..
"If you show them one more f****** time how you put that burglar in a headlock I'm going to f****** kill you"
__________________
"Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."
|
|
|
28 Nov 2004, 22:59
|
#34
|
share the <3
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Location: Location:
Posts: 2,709
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
'the intruder described as "well built" was heard to screech "you're such a fcking douche bag"
__________________
Sophie is hotter than you
though ive gone off her now; the way Susanna Reid squirms around on sml is, however, awesome
|
|
|
28 Nov 2004, 23:32
|
#35
|
Love's Sweet Exile
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Living on a Stair (Now Sword-less)
Posts: 2,371
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dace
"Ironically no camera footage of the break-in was captured"
|
I'd like to see anything beat this one...
__________________
--SYMM--
Ba Ba Ti Ki Di Do
|
|
|
28 Nov 2004, 23:44
|
#36
|
Gone
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 14,656
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Sharon and Ozzy were deeply, deeply saddened by how shite the picture was for this week's caption competition."
Last edited by Marilyn Manson; 28 Nov 2004 at 23:50.
|
|
|
29 Nov 2004, 10:13
|
#37
|
WANNASEEMYNEWCHAINSAW
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Éire
Posts: 2,738
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Pssst. Sharon. Where's the valium? I'm starting to feel things again..."
__________________
I came, I saw, I shouldn't mix pleasure with carpentry.
|
|
|
29 Nov 2004, 13:40
|
#38
|
Kwaak
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 296
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Ozzy what are you doing? ZZzzzzzzzz "
|
|
|
29 Nov 2004, 13:41
|
#39
|
Kwaak
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 296
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"So then I said: 'what up niggah i'll put a cap in yo ass'"
|
|
|
29 Nov 2004, 13:44
|
#40
|
Kwaak
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 296
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
"Don't think this robbery will get you out of the weekly shag ozzy"
|
|
|
30 Nov 2004, 14:27
|
#41
|
Heh, Leeds !
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: In The Redfern
Posts: 3,790
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
Sharon : Ozzy is my tower of Strength. Not a day goes by when he says something to make me feel special and loved.
Ozzy : What day is it again ?
~Vaio~
__________________
The George Harrison of BlueTuba
Yes, I know he is dead !
|
|
|
1 Dec 2004, 14:49
|
#42
|
Has Soup On His Head
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 10,095
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
Ill sort the voting when i get in from work this evening. I have the mouse from hell here, which goes in more directions than British Airways, all of them being completely random from where you want it to go.
PS : Yeh , its been delayed this week. Thats more down to me being unable to find a good source pic for this weeks contest than any actual problems with the entries.
__________________
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new
It was matter for general remark,
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view
In his zeal to discover the Snark
|
|
|
2 Dec 2004, 19:42
|
#43
|
Banned
Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 2,635
|
Re: Friday Caption Contest : 26/11/04
Do you people realise,
this is not Have I Got New For You?
|
|
|
|
All times are GMT +1. The time now is 03:23.
| |