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Unread 31 May 2005, 20:41   #1
Marilyn Manson
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Exclamation So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

For another interview.

Which I'm sure I will fail, again.

I have to get the train down there tommorow and stop over for the night, and then come back on Thursday night. I have essentially no experience of trains, have no tickets booked, and have no hotel booked for the night. It's going to cost me a fortune. Although at least a 5-6 hour journey and a stop over will mean that I can prepare for it.

What a ridiculously shit ordeal for a ****ing interview. I hope I can claw back some of the travel expenses from them.

At least when it's all over, though, I can go back to Teesside and settle back down into a life of loneliness and consumate shitiness, as I evidently deserve.

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Unread 31 May 2005, 20:43   #2
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Good luck
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Unread 31 May 2005, 20:44   #3
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Yeah, good luck boo.

For what kind of job?
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Unread 31 May 2005, 20:45   #4
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Good luck.

If you are going to need to catch a train again soon it may be worth looking into a railcard. It should cost about £18 and saves you 1/3 on all train journeys. Has saved me a fortune. You can also save money by booking your tickets a few days in advance(which isn't much good to you for this journey) and by giving them set times of the train you will catch to get there and back.
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Unread 31 May 2005, 20:45   #5
Marilyn Manson
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Exclamation Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

It's not a job, it's a techer training course.
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Unread 31 May 2005, 20:47   #6
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

hope you get it (do you actually want it?)

anyway, trains arent exactly a "hard" thing to do, just bring a book.
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Unread 31 May 2005, 20:48   #7
Marilyn Manson
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Exclamation Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Do I want it? Is the Pope German? Is Tony Blair a liar? Is Betty Ford a clinic?

Yes, I ****ing want it. Do you think I would travel to a pimple on the arse of nowhere at the other end of the country for kicks?
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Unread 31 May 2005, 20:50   #8
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

lol
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Unread 31 May 2005, 20:50   #9
Deepflow
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

i dunno, maybe you would lose your benefits if you didnt.

you people defy logic in any case, you can't blame me for asking.
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Unread 31 May 2005, 20:55   #10
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Well, I gave you directions the best I could. Also left you my mobile number for urgent help once you get to Chelmsford.

Hotel-wise, there's ****-all hotels in Chelmsford. My best suggestion right now is that you ask at the end of your interview if they know any good/cheap ones.

And good luck, I hope it all goes well.
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Unread 31 May 2005, 20:58   #11
Marilyn Manson
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Exclamation Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Yeah, thanks furball. You were very helpful.

You misunderstand though. I have the interview on Thursday. So I have to find a hotel tommorow night. I don't really care about the quality of the thing. As long as it's got somewhere I can get washed in the morning.
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Unread 31 May 2005, 21:14   #12
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
So I have to find a hotel tommorow night. I don't really care about the quality of the thing. As long as it's got somewhere I can get washed in the morning.
Sleep in a tent and wash in the Chelmer river, you spoiled brat.
In my days, oh I could tell you about my days, during the war and all.
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Unread 31 May 2005, 21:17   #13
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Exclamation Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Yeah, because washing in a river filled with condoms and Essex turds is a great idea immediately before an interview.
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Unread 31 May 2005, 21:28   #14
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
Do I want it? Is the Pope German? Is Tony Blair a liar? Is Betty Ford a clinic?

Yes, I ****ing want it. Do you think I would travel to a pimple on the arse of nowhere at the other end of the country for kicks?
Plus Chelmsford is one of the biggest, chav-infested shit-holes in the south east.

And that's saying something.
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Unread 31 May 2005, 21:33   #15
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

It's not full of chavs when the V Vestival is on.

If you want a free drink I will be near-by visiting my poorly uncle.
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Unread 31 May 2005, 22:32   #16
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Will kill yourself if you fail?

And if so, is that a promise you intend to keep?
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Unread 31 May 2005, 23:08   #17
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Why not stay in London and go out to Chelmsford in the morning?

Anyway, Interviews are all about confidence. They won't remember much of what you say, but they will remember how you say it and your body language. It's all about that.

Good luck MM!
(although I don't know how close I'd want you to helpless children...)
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Unread 1 Jun 2005, 00:15   #18
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Christ MM will be only what, 20mins drive from my home town of Colchester, MM will be close to me!

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Unread 1 Jun 2005, 00:43   #19
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

if you have any trouble finding somewhere to stay, phone Chelmsford TIC (tourist information centre), County Hall, Market Road, Essex 01245 283400 and they should be able to give you some phone numbers of local B&B's
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Unread 1 Jun 2005, 01:03   #20
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phalon
Plus Chelmsford is one of the biggest, chav-infested shit-holes in the south east.

And that's saying something.
Quote:
Originally Posted by part of my PM to Marilyn Manson
Chelmsford is a nice town, although a little high on the chav-o-meter. You can get almost anything you want, and it's close to London.
That's my home town you're talking about shame it's so true

Quote:
Originally Posted by Androme2
It's not full of chavs when the V Vestival is on.

If you want a free drink I will be near-by visiting my poorly uncle.
You going to the V Festival this year? I have a weekend camping ticket

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
Yeah, thanks furball. You were very helpful.

You misunderstand though. I have the interview on Thursday. So I have to find a hotel tommorow night. I don't really care about the quality of the thing. As long as it's got somewhere I can get washed in the morning.
You're very welcome. My best advice is to do as rr said and phone up the tourist information office, they should be able to sort you out fine.
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Unread 1 Jun 2005, 01:11   #21
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Exclamation Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Thanks everybody.
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Unread 1 Jun 2005, 10:07   #22
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

My uncle has a large gaff if it's needed.
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Unread 1 Jun 2005, 10:58   #23
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Good luck with your interview. Good luck in Chelmsford.
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Unread 1 Jun 2005, 11:43   #24
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Androme seems rather eager to see MM...
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Unread 1 Jun 2005, 12:12   #25
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

I want to take out one of his kidneys.
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Unread 1 Jun 2005, 12:26   #26
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Quote:
Originally Posted by Androme2
I want to take out one of his kidneys.
Using only your penis and a tub of vaseline?
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Unread 1 Jun 2005, 14:09   #27
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Real men dont use lubricant!
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Unread 1 Jun 2005, 14:52   #28
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

They don't expect you to know that much about teaching.

They want you to be "eager".

Basically, remember all of those teacher adverts you've seen (use your head, teach), and take your prompts from there. "I want to make a difference", "I want to be able to go home in the evening and think I've done something constructive with my life", "I remember my best teachers and I want to support children's education the way they did".

You know.

Corny. Cheesy. They lap it up.

You can become a cynic about it later, apparently. I'm still in the "eager" stage, because I had to do interviews and stuff for actual jobs recently. Plus, I'm not disillusioned yet
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Unread 1 Jun 2005, 16:24   #29
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

You forgot "I want to have sex with 14-16 year old school girls."
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Unread 1 Jun 2005, 16:42   #30
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Quote:
Originally Posted by LHC
You forgot "I want to have sex with 14-16 year old school boys."
Fixed.
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Unread 2 Jun 2005, 20:40   #31
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Exclamation Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

That went kind of well.

I only really 'stumbled' about once during a rather long interview, but I quickly picked up the pace. Most of the questions asked were not that general, but were fairly specific, so I didn't really say anything that 'cheesy'. I made the interviewer smirk once because of some wise-ass comment. We got on well. I didn't use the word "bitch", or anything innapropriate, like I have been known to do at previous interviews. I kept my cool.

I think that my performance was probably helped by the fact that I was being interviewed by a single bloke, instead of a pair of lesbians who were obviously sleeping with each other, as I was at York.

Although I am expecting not to get it, thus to avoid disapointment.

Chelmsford is ace btw. I only really saw one properly chav gang, and they were outside McDonalds. Chemlsford also has the best grease bar in the world. Still, some decent architecture wouldn't go amiss. Everything I saw aside from a "cathedral" looked like it had been built in 1984 in a hurry.
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Unread 2 Jun 2005, 20:43   #32
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

mariiiii <3


nice to hear things went pretty well
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Unread 2 Jun 2005, 20:48   #33
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
I only really saw one properly chav gang, and they were outside McDonalds.
That comes with the franchise.
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Unread 2 Jun 2005, 20:54   #34
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Exclamation Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Oh, and a girl who looked like she had had whiskers painted on her face asked if I would go into an off-license and buy a litre bottle of cider. I don't know why she picked me. I was just walking back to the B+B and she ran across the road and asked me. She looked about eleven.

My instinct was to refuse, but I eventually went along. She gave me the money, I bought the stuff and then went back to where she was hiding. I expected I would get a shag out of it, or at least a kiss, but she just said heartfelt thanks and walked off.

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Unread 2 Jun 2005, 20:59   #35
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

The joys of underage drinking.

All i ever get is some chavy bint going 'oi bruv av u got a nugget so i can by some fags like'.

Which i always reply with 'Young lady if you can prove you are over the age of 16 i shall certainly give you a pound'. Ok thats a lie, i always say 'nah - im skint'.
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Unread 2 Jun 2005, 21:08   #36
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Exclamation Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Oh, and may I say that railway food (Or, at least, GNER food.) is the worst ****ing food in the entire world?

I don't know how they come up with their menus. I don't want a ham and pickle sandwich in a honey coating. I don't want a salmon salad in a honey coating which tastes like effluent. I don't want three gingersnaps in chocolate coating costing £3. I don't want a semi-warm can of Stella which isn't even served in a pint class. I don't want a tiny bottle of Chilean red costing £6. I don't want a tube of smarties. (I mean really, is this taking the piss or what?) I don't want a tub of soup which has all the appearence, texture, taste and appeal of fluid diahorea.

What I want is a pile of chips and a bacon bun with a pint of Carling. I want something which will put my hunger at bay for more than two minutes.

Who consumes all this shit?!
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Unread 2 Jun 2005, 21:18   #37
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Exclamation Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

The soup was actually called 'primal soup', btw, (Honestly, I swear; someone at GNER HQ is laughing right now.) and it was served with some complimentary bread, which was presumably complimentary on the grounds that no ****er in their right mind would actually pay money for bread which had been baked to a recipe which was inspired by vomit.

Last edited by Marilyn Manson; 2 Jun 2005 at 21:25.
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Unread 2 Jun 2005, 21:22   #38
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
Oh, and a girl who looked like she had had whiskers painted on her face asked if I would go into an off-license and buy a litre bottle of cider. I don't know why she picked me. I was just walking back to the B+B and she ran across the road and asked me. She looked about eleven.

My instinct was to refuse, but I eventually went along. She gave me the money, I bought the stuff and then went back to where she was hiding. I expected I would get a shag out of it, or at least a kiss, but she just said heartfelt thanks and walked off.

Two young girls asked me to buy them drinks a while ago. I had just got off a train from some godforsaken land (Westmorland, I think), hadn't shaved in about a week, and generally looked like a cross between a drug dealer and a tramp. I just laughed at them and asked if they seriously thought the off-licence would believe I wanted two cases of Archers Aqua.
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Quote:
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He was crowned in York Cathedral as 'Expert in the West' by Pope Urban III in 1186.
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Unread 2 Jun 2005, 21:43   #39
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
That went kind of well.

I only really 'stumbled' about once during a rather long interview, but I quickly picked up the pace. Most of the questions asked were not that general, but were fairly specific, so I didn't really say anything that 'cheesy'. I made the interviewer smirk once because of some wise-ass comment. We got on well. I didn't use the word "bitch", or anything innapropriate, like I have been known to do at previous interviews. I kept my cool.

I think that my performance was probably helped by the fact that I was being interviewed by a single bloke, instead of a pair of lesbians who were obviously sleeping with each other, as I was at York.

Although I am expecting not to get it, thus to avoid disapointment.

Chelmsford is ace btw. I only really saw one properly chav gang, and they were outside McDonalds. Chemlsford also has the best grease bar in the world. Still, some decent architecture wouldn't go amiss. Everything I saw aside from a "cathedral" looked like it had been built in 1984 in a hurry.
I'm delighted that things went well. Where did you stay?

It's also nice to see that Phalon was indeed talking out of his arse regarding the chav population. Perhaps he got Chelmsford and Basildon/Southend confused . Chelmsford's architecture is nothing stunning, I agree - but everything else it offers makes up for it

Where was this grease bar? I expect I've been there at some point...
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Unread 2 Jun 2005, 21:50   #40
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
Oh, and may I say that railway food (Or, at least, GNER food.) is the worst ****ing food in the entire world?

I don't know how they come up with their menus. I don't want a ham and pickle sandwich in a honey coating. I don't want a salmon salad in a honey coating which tastes like effluent. I don't want three gingersnaps in chocolate coating costing £3. I don't want a semi-warm can of Stella which isn't even served in a pint class. I don't want a tiny bottle of Chilean red costing £6. I don't want a tube of smarties. (I mean really, is this taking the piss or what?) I don't want a tub of soup which has all the appearence, texture, taste and appeal of fluid diahorea.

What I want is a pile of chips and a bacon bun with a pint of Carling. I want something which will put my hunger at bay for more than two minutes.

Who consumes all this shit?!
The Norwegian Nation Railroad Service (NSB) has for years proved their ingenuity by offering sandwiches with cheese that is both dry and sweaty. I'm quite sure that breaks some laws of physics.
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Unread 2 Jun 2005, 22:01   #41
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

My sister has asked me to buy alcohol for her and her friends tomorrow night :/

And I hope you did ok, Andrew. Just keep checking the GTTR site, it'll be up there before you hear about it...
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Unread 2 Jun 2005, 23:03   #42
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Exclamation Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Quote:
Originally Posted by furball
Where did you stay?
A B+B. In fact, it was really just a rather large suburban house owned by a middle-aged couple. Was very nice. Only about ten minutes walk from campus, as well. £25 a night, which was very reasonable, all things considered.

I found it by scanning a map on a board outside the tourist office. I got there about 5:15, so I missed the actual office itself by a mere fifteen minutes. I just looked for somewhere cheap. Most places charged £50-£70 per night, or something equally larcenous, so they were a bargain by comparison. I expected that they would be a farmhouse halfway between Chelmsford and Great Yarmouth, but by some miracle they were located almost just outside the high street. A fact which was confirmed for me through the help of two large middle aged women who were a sort of cross between Les Dawson and Pam Ayres.

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Originally Posted by furball
It's also nice to see that Phalon was indeed talking out of his arse regarding the chav population.
There are more chavs in most villages in the NE than the total amount I saw during my stay in Chelmsford. You haven't seen proper chavdom until you've visited Teesside and County Durham.

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Originally Posted by furball
Where was this grease bar? I expect I've been there at some point...
Just near the railway station. I can't remember the exact name, indeed, I'm not even sure if it had a proper name, but I remember it's signs, which generally read CHIPS! BURGERS! SAVALOYS! GREASE! FAT! UNHEALTHY FOODS OF EVERY DESCRIPTION!, if memory serves. It also seemed to be staffed entirely by Turks/Arabs.
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Unread 2 Jun 2005, 23:46   #43
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

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Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
Just near the railway station. I can't remember the exact name, indeed, I'm not even sure if it had a proper name, but I remember it's signs, which generally read CHIPS! BURGERS! SAVALOYS! GREASE! FAT! UNHEALTHY FOODS OF EVERY DESCRIPTION!, if memory serves. It also seemed to be staffed entirely by Turks/Arabs.
I'm laughing my arse of.
By your first post I thought you meant a Grease theme bar, with a jukebox with only music from the film, Travolta Burgers, etc.
And people* says idiocy can't be amusing.













*Supposedly they say this. Atleast people claim they do.
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Unread 3 Jun 2005, 00:13   #44
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

i find you amusing.
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Unread 3 Jun 2005, 00:32   #45
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Exclamation Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

I saw a shop called 'James Dace and Son', btw.

That made me smile.
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Unread 3 Jun 2005, 00:39   #46
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

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Originally Posted by Nantoz
The Norwegian Nation Railroad Service (NSB) has for years proved their ingenuity by offering sandwiches with cheese that is both dry and sweaty. I'm quite sure that breaks some laws of physics.
Not to mention the Lasagne done by microwave or something for 95NOK or 8£.
The food on the trains is *horrible*.
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Unread 3 Jun 2005, 02:47   #47
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson (the grease bar)
Just near the railway station. I can't remember the exact name, indeed, I'm not even sure if it had a proper name, but I remember it's signs, which generally read CHIPS! BURGERS! SAVALOYS! GREASE! FAT! UNHEALTHY FOODS OF EVERY DESCRIPTION!, if memory serves. It also seemed to be staffed entirely by Turks/Arabs.
Ah, I know exactly where you mean. You turned right out of the front of the railway station I expect. Up that road you have most of Chelmsford's chippies, serving filth to the local youth most nights of the week.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nantoz
I'm laughing my arse of.
By your first post I thought you meant a Grease theme bar, with a jukebox with only music from the film, Travolta Burgers, etc.
I thought the same was trying to think through all the dodgy nightclubs in Chelmsford.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marilyn Manson
I saw a shop called 'James Dace and Son', btw.

That made me smile.
I never ever thought of that before. And now every time I walk past it, I will think of Dace. Damn you. (it's actually a great little music shop)
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Unread 3 Jun 2005, 02:50   #48
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

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Originally Posted by furball
Ah, I know exactly where you mean. You turned right out of the front of the railway station I expect. Up that road you have most of Chelmsford's chippies, serving filth to the local youth most nights of the week.
I thought the same was trying to think through all the dodgy nightclubs in Chelmsford.

I never ever thought of that before. And now every time I walk past it, I will think of Dace. Damn you. (it's actually a great little music shop)
i've only ever been to chelmsford mags.

so i've only ever turned left at the station exit.

i still couldn't find anywhere to take luncheon.

but it is a sweet little town.
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Unread 3 Jun 2005, 02:56   #49
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

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Originally Posted by Yahwe
i've only ever been to chelmsford mags.

so i've only ever turned left at the station exit.

i still couldn't find anywhere to take luncheon.

but it is a sweet little town.
Agreed, Chelmsford doesn't have many competent eateries when you don't know where to look. Most sandwich shops are tucked away in small alleys, while restaurants are few and far between.

What did you think of the magistrates' court? I suppose that you haven't been to the Crown Court, otherwise you would have mentioned it. I did work experience at both, so know both fairly well; however, they represent the limit of my experience in that regard, aside from a short visit to the Royal Courts of Justice.
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Unread 3 Jun 2005, 03:00   #50
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Re: So tommorow I'm going to Chelmsford

i never got to the crown in chelmsford (though i know the resident judge). the mags is pleasent as an environment.

far better than basildon, grays or southend for sheer prettiness.

i was just surprised that such a charming town has so few places to eat. basildon which is much less charming has lots. grays of course has none.
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