Thread: My parents
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Unread 22 Oct 2006, 22:47   #19
Dante Hicks
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Re: My parents

"Debt" is one way of describing the relationship one (might) hold with one's parents but I don't feel it's sufficient here (the implications are too calculating). It's more about what's reasonable to expect one person to do. Setting up a standing order to send your parents £200 a month to help pay with bills is one thing, having to quit your job to become a full-time carer is quite another.

Ultimately I'd like to help everyone out to the full extent possible, but under existing (or perhaps any) social arrangements that's impractical for various reasons. An imperfect principle then is to help those nearest or closest to you first and then those in greatest need generally.

As for paying my family bills if they couldn't pay them, sure - why not? But why did these bills arise? Will they be a regular thing? Do I have the income to support this long-term? If someone's outgoings are regularly exceeding their income then obviously there's a problem? Are they receiving the full pension / benefits they should be receiving?

I'd imagine increasingly common would be people selling their home when they reach a certian age (e.g. to pay for their care/medical treatments) or to "unlock the value of your home" sort of thing. While specific practices in this field might be dodgy, I see no problem in principle with it. The idea that you should expect to inherit your parents home when they die seems quite strange and one that may become less common. You may not "owe" your parents anything, but then don't expect them to leave you anything when they die.

Ultimately the treatment of the elderley is a question which will become of the utmost importance. Historically the numbers of old people seems to have been such that they were supportable by either families or welfare states or whatever. It's not clear given that both institutions are in decline (or transformation) how these things will be paid for (especially if increases in life expectancy continue).

Saying "Oh well, they brought it on themselves" (either socially or personally) about your parents/old seems slightly glib. If your parents are 70 years old they would have lived through social changes totally unpredictable in their youth. Perhaps they should have saved more money for retirement, or worked harder in their career so they don't need help from others when they get hold. But for those of us who aren't Nietzschean ubermenschen will probably realise they've made similar errors but would still want help from others from time to time.

Similarly, we're all partially responsible for how society develops but it's not like when in 2040 and you're afraid to leave your home because of the shoot outs between Crack++ dealers or the atmosphere is boiling away that you'll be able to completely to blame for what's happened.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BesigedB
I'm amazed that people are taking this deep insightful question from a first time poster on a usually offbeat board seriously.
Some of the best threads have started from shit first posts (and by even shittier posters). You could probably find some sort of random bot which auto-generated a question of the week for people to discuss (if people were so inclined).
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