this ladies and gentlemen is a true tale or betrayal which has offended me greatly, not for the actual slight involved, but for its deeper meaning.
this all began on Saturday afternoon. I recieved a phonecall from a friend with whom I lived with for a couple of years, whilst at university. He asked if I wanted to go and watch the football (FA Cup Final \o/) with him, his girlfriend (whom I also lived with for two years) and his friend from back home (whom I had met on several occasions). I said I would, but I would need a lift home as the buses stop running at a silly time so I would be otherwise stranded. He asked his girlfriend (who was driving) if it woud be ok, she said yes. It was all sorted.
I went to the bus stop shortly before 1pm to get the bus. It eventually turned out that I had memorised the wrong bus time and it didn't arrive until 2pm, so I was pretty much guaranteed to miss kick-off. Being prepared for a long time queuing in the pub I made the sensible move of making myself a large Jack Daniels and coke in a 1/2 litre bottle which used to contain orange juice. I did not drink before I got on the bus, lest the driver should smell it on me and cast me out.
When I finally got on the bus (after waiting for more than an hour) I noticed there was only one other person on the bus. It was one of my old heads of year, a rather strict one at that. It is amazing how even after all these years an old authority figure can instill feelings of terror. All of a sudden, I became very consious of the contents of the bottle and the illegal activity for which I had it prepared. It took me a good 20 minutes before I dared to open the bottle. I'm not sure it was my imagination, but the smell of JD and coke has never been so pungent. Yet remarkably, after a few swigs the tension wained and I almost forgot about the old authoritarian sitting towards the back of the bus.
But I digress. I got off the bus around 3pm and started running up the street to the pub where we had all arranged to mee. I should also note that I invited another friend (whom I have know for about a decade and who is also a Chelsea fan) As I was running up the street I recieved a text saying they had gone to another pub as it was 'closer'. I never found out what that meant as they were in a car and could park in the car park which is literally two minutes from the originally designated pub. I informed them that I was going to the other pub as I was closer to it (which I was) and that when me and my Chelsea-supporting friend have watched a Chelsea cup final together they have never lost (which is true). I told them to meet us there at half-time and they said they would.
About 10 minutes into the second half, I saw them in the pub and waved them over. they waved us over, but we had seats, were right next to the screen and there was loads of room for them to come and stand (which they were already doing). About 2o minutes into vhe game,I recieved a text saying they were going to go to the pub on the other side of the road. I thought they were being very rude so let them go and continued to watch the game.
About 6:30 (after we were victorious!) I gave them a call and recieved no answer. I had recieved no texts and had no missed calls. they had only gone and left me stranded!
Needles to say, I was fuming. the only condition I made for coming out was that they take me home. So, after being ignorant all afternoon they finally added insult to injury by ****ing off and leaving me with no way to go home.
Forvunatly, I was still with my other friend and his girlfriend so we went out and got (even more) pissed. We went to the casino which disappointingly didn't have
any proper poker games (which is probably for the best as I'm truely terrible at poker) and then went home and slept in their living room.
At 12pm the next day (after a fabulous cup of tea) I went to the bus station, only to find that the buses which go to my little village/ghetto do not run on a Sunday, nor did they run to anyhere which was remotely close to where I needed to be.
In the end I had to get the bus from Swansea to Cardiff (which took an hour) at 2pm and then the 3:40pm train from Cardiff to the nearest bus stop and get a lift back home off my sister. In between this mammother journey I reluctantly stopped at the only take-away tea shop I was sure was within walking distance (Starbuck
) and ordered a cup of tea.
I should also mention that I wore my one-a-day contact lenses to Swansea so spent the entire day walking around blind as a bat. Crossing the road really was terrifying. the lady asked if I wanted a medium cup which I did and I got this cup of tea which was far too beig to be considered a medium. Honest to god, it was the most disgusting cup of tea I have ever experianced.
She must have thought I was mad because I had to put the little packets of sugar right up to my face to see what was written on the side. For some reason there were no spoons, only long wooden sticks which meant I had to estimate how much sugar to put in (I ony have sugar when I've been drinking or am ill) and I put a load in and it still tasted foul. I would have been better to tip it all in the bin and fill the cup to the brim with semi-skimmed milk.
As this wasn't bad enough there was this little bitch (no more than nine years of age) who was on the train with her older sister and her mother who was listening to (bad) music on her phone for most of the hour-long train journey. It's not bad enough that she was inconsiderate enough to inflict such terrible music on the (practially) empty train (which is of course, not the point) I also had to listen to her sing. Not just to sing, but to sing the new Avril Lavigne song and the lastest effort by Eminem and his posse. I don't wish to be all preachy and middle-aged but if I said (regardless of context) some of the filth from Eminem and Avril 'I'm the mother-****ing Princess' Lavigne I would have had a slap across the back of the head. But did the mother so much as tell her to watch her language? Did she balls! to make atters worse at one point she started clapping along (wtf!) to the music. In the middle of a train!
I was so tempted just to throw my cup of minging-arse tea all over the little bitch for being such a shit human being. But by this time it had cooled, so would have been a waste. So I just sat there, drinking something that tasted like my own liquified filth and seethed. Having left my friends house at 12pm, I got home at 4:49pm and have yet to hear a word from my deserters who have severely pissed me off. to be honest, I'm not really
that angry, I'm just disappointed. I expected more from these people. Oh well, time to find some new friends.