So I am going to America...
 

...for three months. Does anyone have any great advice of things to do/visit/see/steal/have sex with while I'm in new york city, las vegas and los angeles? I've heard good things about all-you-can-eat buffets that are really cheap so you save on money for food (i may be a rich student but that's fairly relative). I should probably be getting a job in an irish bar in new york so here's to perpetuating cliched national stereotypes :up:

Re: So I am going to America...
 

Irish bars are nice. In America, they give you huge salads for like, decoration. Portions are much larger than in the UK. New York isn't bad, but it's extremely hot and busy. July the 4th is amazing, I've never seen anything like it in the UK (ironically) but everyone's really friendly, and it's a huge family event, and everyone's nice and calm and it works, unlike any big event in the UK where everything gets flooded and breaks.

Re: So I am going to America...
 

If i were you i'd go to San Diego (which rocks) rather than LA (which is dirty and tacky) BUT THAT'S JUST ME!

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Are they happy? They seem so scared all the time.

As for sex, Jonny, don't think you will see as many pretties as the movies will have you believe. The last figure I saw for prevalence of overweight amongst Americans was 63% - 20-30% with a BMI over 30, i.e. proper fatties.
But you might get lucky and meet some would-be moviestarlet in L.A and sway her with your Irish charms and perpetual foamy Guiness mustache...

Re: So I am going to America...
 

BTW when you're in Las Vegas you're gonna have to do the whole "Grand Canyon thing" (i went on the plane flying over it as well as a ground tour thingie when i were there).

Re: So I am going to America...
 

I'm just going generally to california dace. There's a lot of people in Santa Barbara we know so I'll probably spend a fair amount of time there.

Here's hoping on the wannabe movie-starlet front though!

Re: So I am going to America...
 

Eating out in general always seemed to be much cheaper whenever I was in the States. I've never been to New York, but I have been to Vegas and Los Angeles. Vegas is a fun place to visit (for people who are 21 or over, that is, because otherwise you'll just get moved on from pretty much everywhere lest your vulnerable soul be corrupted by the sight of slot machines) though I certainly don't think I'd want to live there. Walking down the Strip (the main street) at night is a good thing to do because of all the marvellous lights, and just exploring the casinos during the day time you should find plenty of things to look at and do; New York New York has a rollercoaster on the roof, MGM Grand has a zoo enclosure with a half dozen lions in it on the ground floor and a small theme park in its back garden, and a number of the themed hotels do shows at various points during the day - the Hawaiin-themed hotel that I forget the name off has a volcano show thing that's particularly impressive. There is, surprisingly, plenty of oppurtunity for gambling there. I'd reccomend seeing the Grand Canyon while you're there, you can get these helicopter rides through and around it which are certainly worthwhile though I don't know how much it costs.

Los Angeles didn't strike me as a particularly nice place. The air was dirty, it was very busy and overwhelmingly hot. That said, it wasn't a total loss since I did see OJ Simpson getting himself some breakfast buffet at our hotel. There are plenty of things to do there in the sense that there are plenty of things to do in any major city - shopping and etcetera. I wasn't there for long so I can't think of any particular attractions to visit.

Re: So I am going to America...
 

Maybe you'll even pop by 'Frisco for a short while? I hear you can meet a lot of gentle people there if you wear some flowers in your hair....

And do make sure to tape your encounter with the starlet; you can sell it afterwards and maybe end up with a small profit to go with your AIDS!

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Do not, I repeat do not, take the attitude that you have here to the states. In addition, the places you are going are overcrowded, but the night life is sweet in New york. Please hang out in a group. There are good oppourtunities to meet girls, but you must have money.

Re: So I am going to America...
 

What attitude? Do you mean don't talk to total strangers like I talk to my friends? I'll have to remember that! Also I want a woman not a prostitute :(

Re: So I am going to America...
 

To clear it up, I only had 1 prostitute in my life. It was when I was 17, and I was In Thailand. And I'm serious about the group thing. Actually, I was being dead serious. Many times foreigners hear about the positives, but never the negatives.

Re: So I am going to America...
 

What you want to remember primarily is that everyone, everyone over there has firearms so the first thing you'll want to do after you land is make sure you're packing heat.

For bars and clubs, you'll be needing a Beretta for general-purpose tasks such as pulling corks and 'distributing' nachos. Just in case a homosexual makes illicit advances upon you, you may consider an M4 assault rifle (with optional silver crucifix in-lay) to lay out your sexuality clearly. For those communist encounters, show them who's boss with a 12-guage concealed under the confederate flag. In the unlikely event of an altercation, having an M1A2 Abrams in reserve will both give you added reassurance and a pimping ride for the inevitable streams of ho's I fully antipate you'll catch herpes from.

Most of all, good luck!

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By God, Chika. You just reached a new low, something I didn't think was possible.
It doesn't even matter if you were being serious. Filthy, pathetic pig.

Re: So I am going to America...
 

Chika is more amusing than Nantoz, both are quite shit though.

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dude, he already lives in ireland.

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How is that pathetic?

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The difference is my shit is make believe, when Nantoz's is quite genuine.

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*sigh* how sad.
I have no wish to bicker with you, it's wearisome.
But it is plain stupid to liken me with Chika. I find the idea of prostitutes far from amusing, and our reps aren't really comparable.

Re: So I am going to America...
 

The entire concept of resorting to whores, aswell as finding it amusing to talk about, is very close to the definition of pathetic.

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The fact that you even referenced the rep system is a tad bit revealing to how lame you are in RL.
I think people took the "you have to have money" thing wrong. I wasn't meaning prostitues, I was meaning a nice girl wants you to take her out. Broke people don't get girls. We are from different worlds and different repstatus* I can see why the mixup.























*just for an ! on how funny a natoz's comment was to me.

Re: So I am going to America...
 

you can ask yourself "why?"

over and over and over and over and over and over again

Re: So I am going to America...
 

People understood you, and then Jonny made a joke. You replied with a comment lacking any vestiges of humour whatsoever..

Re: So I am going to America...
 

i cleared this up in the post below this post of yours i quoted. I won't count it against you.
You really need to get a grip, I wasn't referenceing prostitution, and even if I was, so what dude. Its a forum. rather your right or wrong, you still lose, as noone cares how you feel about anything any.

Re: So I am going to America...
 

Dude, I live only 7 hours drive from Las Vegas, come over to my house so we can have a watermelon eating contest!!!!1

Re: So I am going to America...
 

Ah, lol @ myself for not catching Jonny's joke. You "carried" the situation by posting an equally shyt post though.

Re: So I am going to America...
 

What are you rambling on about?

Re: So I am going to America...
 

You do realise that no matter what point you start from, and no matter what direction you drive in, seven hours is enough to put you in the sea in Ireland. To me seven hours drive is the opposite side of the world. I shall remember to bring a gun pab. Also I don't really get the group thing although I obviously will be hanging around in a group seeing as I'm going with my friends.

Re: So I am going to America...
 

Protip: drive in circles.

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This is what you do, hang around looking conspicious and irish till you see a peaceofficer. Walk to the edge of one of their 'highways' and when the traffic stops cross the road. When you're arrested for jaywalking, make GD proud and go into a rant about the nation of the free not allowing a person to walk where they want to walk.

Re: So I am going to America...
 

This applies to any part of the world. Unless you're talking to a clown. In which case the polite thing to do is to laugh.
This is stupid. Talk about politics all you want.

I wouldn't know (though I've been to both). As a music affectionado I'd recommend you go see a show at the Whiskey A Go-Go in LA. I'd also recommend checking out the DNA Lounge in SF if you get a chance, but that's mainly because I want to go there :(

Yeah, have a good time. And remember, anyone fit is that way be elective surgery, because you can only get shit for food in America :rolleyes:

Re: So I am going to America...
 

I never talk to anyone about my political beliefs in case they try and have me committed :(

Re: So I am going to America...
 

LA does indeed suck.

the best bit in it is universal city. no joke.

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To me 7 hours means that I can get up in the morning at my house and meet my friend in Las Vegas by the end of the day. Friends I have in Florida and Hawai'i I can't say that about. :\

Re: So I am going to America...
 

In 7 hours driving time i can end up near scotland, in wales, in france, germany and all the assorted pointless nations bordering between them. TBH if i can't get there in 2 hours max it isn't worth it.

Re: So I am going to America...
 

I can understand. When I lived in Hawai'i, I thought a 30 minute drive was 'far'. Now it takes me over 30 minutes just to get to work everyday.

Re: So I am going to America...
 

I totally understand the distance thing.

Where I live, 5 minutes is all it takes to get from one side of town to the other. 7 hours would land you somewhere is the middle of the desert with nothing to stare at except rocks, red sand and the occasional spinnifex bush. It's a 12 hour drive with no stops to get to the next major town/city.

Re: So I am going to America...
 

See (read) all of you in a few months!

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;(

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No Johnny! NO, NO!

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that is WHY it was a penal colony ffs !!!!

Re: So I am going to America...
 

If you like driving you should rent a car and drive across America. :)

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just cos i dont think anyone else has yet jonny, have a good holiday you lucky lucky bastard

Re: So I am going to America...
 

Let's all talk about him and laugh while he's gone, he'll never notice! ;|

Re: So I am going to America...
 

not only that but consider that 7 hours of driving in the uk/europe will cover a signifcantly larger distance as we are allowed to drive at normal speeds, rather than the snail pace that they force the americans to drive at

Re: So I am going to America...
 

I'm too late to wish Jonny good luck, aren't I? :(

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Re: So I am going to America...
 

-just in case you log on when you're out here..
I live in Los Angeles.

Go to Miyagi's and Dublin's on Sunset Blvd. Both clubs are melting pots of blondes, brunettes, Hispanics and Asians, as soon as they learn that you're Irish, you will get laid. On Hollywood Blvd, go to this club called Ivar - lots of hot Persian girls. Also visit Manhattan, Malibu, Santa Monica, Seal and Huntington Beaches if you're into surfer bars and clubs.

Specifically Santa Monica, 3rd St. Promenade and the Pier, are good places to hang out at. 6-Flags Magic Mountain, Universal Studios and Knotts Berry Farm are outstanding parks. Magic Mountain has rides that will give you a heart attack. Don't go to Disneyland.

There are a bunch of small clubs and Irish bars in the south Los Angeles area like Cerritos and Long Beach. Pretty much anywhere in LA, if you open your mouth and start talking to these dumb Los Angeles girls with your "interesting" Irish accent and you will get laid.

There is a cool club in Woodland Hills (about 40 minutes away from Santa Barbara) called Yankee Doodles, every thursday night is ladies night, and you will get laid.

In Orange County and San Diego, go to the Block of Orange and hang out at Dave and Busters. Newport Beach is Blonde Heaven. Downtown San Diego has some of the coolest small bars, clubs, and malls. I ****ed one of the hottest Mexicans I've ever met in Imperial Beach in San Diego.

In Las Vegas, stay at Ceasar's Palace and visit this club in that hotel called Pure, and you will bang the hottest ****ing Asians you will ever see in your life. Also like Dace said, get a helicopter ride from the Las Vegas strip to the Grand Canyon. Stay at the Grand Canyon for at least 3 days and ride a cable car all the way to the bottom and camp out for a night, if you're into that.

NYC has Bar Code, and a bunch of clubs and Irish bars right in the middle of Time Square. Also visit Ground-0, it's kinda depressing though, it's up to you. Ride the ferry from Manhattan to Staten Island then back at night and take awesome pictures of Manhattan and the Statue of Liberty from the ferry.

Re: So I am going to America...
 

The top speed limit in my state is 70 mph which I believe is the same as in UK/Ireland, so I'm not sure what you're on about. :confused:

Re: So I am going to America...
 

He's probably thinking about Autobahn (and the eqivalent in other continental European countries), where there is no speed limit whatsoever.

Re: So I am going to America...
 

Get a pickup truck and a pipe and drive through all the cornfields in the midwest until you have a huge flotilla of police cars behind you, and then we can see you on The World's Wildest Irish Car Cases, and then go down to the Bible Belt and tell them all that they've got shit on their lips and set fire to Kansas and all that.