In the wake of recent events
Going out with women.
It's expected for the man to show some gentleman's gestures, and for me it's rather normal - it's the way I've been raised to work things out with dates, and it's the way it usually works best. Do I get branded as a chauv (admitted, if chauvinism is what "radical feminism" isn't, then, I'm definately a chauv no questions there) if I open doors, pay the bill, and walk the lady home? I'd assume I'd get, but on the other hand none of the the (few of them) women I've been out with so far have complained about it, even though it's definately chauvinism. (and the popular opinion seems to be that when it comes down to being a gentleman and nice to women it's actually expected that men behave chauvinistic). |
Re: In the wake of recent events
Women want equality, with added perks.
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Ok. I'll keep on being a gent then. I'll not mention I got the tip off the interweb forums, though.
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That's just silly, though, taking into account that they find the word "woman" insulting.
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Oh God, don't take my word for it.
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In fact, the between the lines message was my wondering on the situation at large, given the posts furball dug up. I'm just a little baffled by the situation, but I think the equality with perks sums it up. It still makes no sense, though, but I guess that's normal with women.
ps. It's quiet at work and I'm a little bored. |
Re: In the wake of recent events
Firstly, it's womyn.
Secondly, I think this irrationality permiates pretty much everyone in society. Even discounting God-mania, pretty much everyone has some belief or other that would absolutly crumble under any kind of careful consideration of the facts. Rationality and intellectual honesty are two aspects of society that desperatly needed and desperatly lacking in modern society. |
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To be honest, I think they're not desperately needed. And if they were, they're not really a positive thing. Imagine, if all those womyn, all of the sudden, started thinking "rationally" and "intellectually honestly". I think that'd just drive them nuts, and the public healthcare is already struggling with the amount of suiciders and other freaks pouring in.
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Re: In the wake of recent events
The people I linked to are radical feminists. Like any radical, they're complete retards who are unrepresentive of the whole.
Women might not look down on you for not opening doors, etc, but it'll get you brownie points. Splitting the bill depends on the person you're with and how things went - if you chose the restaurant then it'd probably be a good idea for you to play, but if she's dragged you to a dingy cafe then it's all in the moment. Some women refuse to let men pay for them, just accept it and count the money you'll be saving. |
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The thing is, furball, how can a radical feminist, if a feminist by definition is defending equality, be so anti-male?
I actually worked for almost an hour now! Ps. If I wanted good company cheap, I'd pick an appointment to the University Health Care psychologists. They're 3,50 per hour, don't bitch, nag, whine, or cringe, always listen, always talk to you back, and at least pretend they're interested. Heehoo. |
Re: In the wake of recent events
A feminist promotes female equality with men. A radical* feminist promotes women over men - and that woman took it to the extreme.
*retarded |
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Just a sidenote, though, I wouldn't suggest going anywhere near one of these radical feminists, or womyn, however you see it. ps. brownie points are always good when it comes to women. |
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Women usually want it both ways but rarely allow men to get it both ways.
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I'm confused. Are you trying to say you're not getting ****ed in the ass enough? |
Re: In the wake of recent events
Paying for the bill with a woman is stupid unless you're better off than her or you'll reap the "rewards". I don't necessarily mean sexual rewards here. I might pay for the meal if my girlfriend has driven over to mine, instead of me having to get a train to hers. Or if I know she'll pay for something else if I pay for the meal (eg: cinema or tickets to something).
Paying for a meal with a woman is the equivalent of buying a drink for a girl in a bar. It's stupid, and it's (in my opinion) close to social prostitution as you're effectively paying the girl for her company. |
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Actually i think he showed an excellent grasp of English (for somebody who doesn't have english as their first language) and used it to good comedy effect.
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Being a gentleman and being a chauvinist are two very different things. That said, the bulk of my knowledge about dating comes from wikipedia. I feel sad. :(
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In fact, that's an interesting way of thinking about it. Never looked at it like that.
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Its quite distressing. I feel like a man-whore. I've yet to decide whether i enjoy this feeling or not. |
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I'm not sure what furball's c&p had to do with my post. Are you saying we should buy girls drinks to get them to talk to us?
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No, what I am saying, is, that the part about
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I'm drunk, and puzzled. |
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Khehe. How about. A whiskey without rocks, down on the first one, goodbye miss'. |
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Offering to buy someone a drink is an excellent ice breaker I find.
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This is equally true of paying for a date, which was the original point of the thing (rather than your aside - for which the c&p is even more relevant) in that you pay AFTER the meal. If a date goes badly, split the bill; if a date goes well, pay! It's a nice gesture, it's chivalrous, and the chances are you're getting paid more anyway. |
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This might be specific to that sort of circumstances though - most girls who go clubbing seem to be in the student category and therefore permanently broke. Since I've had many a clubbing night made worse by lack of funds, if it's during the seven day period each month that I have money, I'll tend to be sympathetic. As someone else mentioned, it's a good ice-breaker - for whatever reason it's seen as socially acceptable to buy a stranger a drink and as a non-smoker, I don't have many excuses for "going in cold". If the girl doesn't want to talk to you then it's pretty easy to say "Oh, sorry my friend's gone to get me one" or "No, I'm fine thanks" or a million other things. If she says no, and doesn't offer any more dialogue it's pretty clear what the response is. But if you go in with some "line" or even genuine conversation it's slightly more difficult to extricate yourself from the ensuing train wreck. And it's not like you're paying for her dying brother to get a heart transplant - it's a fivers worth of drink - I don't imagine most women (even the ones I can talk to) can be bribed for that. And if they can, I'm not really sure I want to go any further before seeing a comprehensive STD workup. Conversely though, generosity would seem a reasonable character trait to desire in a partner and/or friends. I'm not saying that you should look for a partner who will buy you presents every day, but life is a lot easier if you're surrounded by people who aren't entirely self-serving and shit. Unless it's done in an explicitly calculating manner getting the drinks in (when you can afford it) is one way of showing that you're not entirely self-serving. People being unnecessarily miserly is one of the most unpleasant character traits there is. The sort of people who argue for twenty minutes about why their share of the restaurant bill should be three quid less because they didn't have x ("it's not the money...it's the principle..!"). |
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Buying a drink for somebody you never met is a bit much I think, I mean as an opener ofcourse. But if you've been talking to her a while about random stuff, offering something to drink is alot better in my opinion.
For example I loved this one situation where a friend of mine asked a girl if she wanted something to drink as an opening line. She said "yeah, a vodka redbull please." He should've just left her standing there, but he was horny I guess and went with it. He actually had to ask another friend and me if he could borrow some change to pay for it.. he ended up standing next to her, trying to talk but she kept responding really dry he said and he buggered off after a while. Anyway, I'm wondering about this situation I'm in now. I'm kinda steady-dating this girl atm and so far I've offered to pay (she had her wallet in her hand for the movies etc) and paid for everything (movie, drinks and game of pool) because she's a student and I work already. But I wonder if she'll now think that I'll just keep paying for everything from now on, or if it's normal that I pay for everything. It's the first girl I've dated since I started working and she lives in a small studio for which her parents pay, she also gets a small allowance from her parents. She's planning to take up some weekend work though but I doubt it's for the near future. |
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It was last autumn, or early winter to be specific, that I had been dating this girl for a few weeks, and she suggested going out to see a movie. Having not had better things to do, I went out to see some random film with her. Earlier on, I had paid for some small stuff like drinks and pool, while she had paid some herself but never the other way around. Anyways, while we were picking up the tickets she said roughly "You'll pay, right?". I walked her home from afterwards, turned away from the kiss, and said said her the classical "you're a nice girl, but not quite it, maybe we could be friends". Quote:
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*Pop anthropology is fun! |
Re: In the wake of recent events
I think I'm just going to have to be content with your note regarding equality with perks. (Beating the concept equality out of the word equality).
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